Ex BF contacts me after 4 months & ignores my response (date, guy)

[kadmoore]

Hello,
I am very confused and slightly upset at the situation with my ex. He broke up with me about 4 months ago because we weren't compatible enough and have different goals. I agreed and started to move on. All of a sudden he reaches out to me and says :
" Hello. I wanted to give it some time before contacting you after we broke up. I just had a thought about you & wanted to know how you were doing. How is school & how are your summer intership plans going ? ( we are both in university , 24 and 25 years old ) Also we never said anything about staying friends.

I was shocked to hear from him, but rresponded to his message about 6-7 hours later. Very casually and answered his specific questions. Didn't add anything more. I ended by asking how he was doing.

It's been about 3 days and he never responded. I don't understand and it's really got me frazzled. I feel like he was messing with my head. I can't help to wonder what his point was. Why did he text me only to ignore me ? Does he regret reaching out ? Is he playing games ? If he genuinely wanted to know how I was why would he ignore me ?

Any advice, thoughts or perspective on the situation would be appreciated.

Thank you.

[zentropa]

Maybe he just wanted to know how you were doing, because you ended on a friendly note it seems. He might reply after awhile. He just didn't want to engage in a long text conversation. I get that.

Do you want him back? It seems so since you got so emotional and "upset" about a fairly benign text.

If he knew you would react like that I'm sure he would have not bothered.

[Gretchen963]

He probably just wanted to touch base with you and see how you were. I wouldn't read anything more into his simple text.

[DontH8Me]

This is a good example of why I am in the camp of "when it's over, it's over." I would have ignored the text.

[rego00123]

He is stringing you along

For what reason, only he will know for sure.
Things probabaly are not going so hot for him in his personal life and he jumped at the only person he knew would listen. (Aka: reverting to what he knows is comfortable)

The only advice I could give you is to not buy all in to his advancements in contact and keep things cordial if you really have no intentions for or with him.

[beachie123]

i had something similar happen this week. a little different, but i met a guy at a party in december. we went out on one date in january. i haven't heard from him since, until this past saturday, three days ago at around 2 pm. he used my name in the text, so it wasn't sent to me by accident. he just basically said hi and how are you? (more words than that, but that was the gist). i responded same day about an hour later. all i said was i am good and asked how he is doing. he didn't respond until the next day, again around 2 pm, telling me that he is busy next few weeks and that he was napping. i jokingly asked him how he can be texting if he is napping.

then...nothing...

it's been two days and i haven't heard from him again. what the heck? he reached out to me and then leaves me hanging. i don't get it. i won't answer him anymore because i really don't need the flakiness and/or any drama in my life. but it was just weird.

[ContraPagan]

Should've had him in No Contact from the time of the break-up. Block his number and him on all social media if you are serious about moving on, or else he will just keep trying to drag you back.

[reneeh63]

Yeah...he really "gotcha" - forget him. It doesn't matter what his motivations are. You are done with him so stop any contact - who cares that he initiated? Why would you feel obligated - because he certainly doesn't!

[tidaldream]

...unless his new significant other deleted your reply.

[LowonLuck]

At least you got a message... I sometimes would get a "hey". I respond "hey" and it is met with silence. Maybe he is just checking to make sure my phone works...