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Looking at it from the husband's point of view, the OP has flown at least several more times since the bad incident and had no problems. So it may be understandable that he's upset, thinking that she now just doesnt want to be with his family. Compunded by what are apparently other problems in the marriage, his attitude may not be unreasonable.
OP: I may have misread, but I thought that I read that you often have these feelings, like maybe on the edge and stressed out in general. Is that the case? Maybe this is just making it all a little worse with the added stress of school? I can't help but wonder if your husband is more of a problem here than it initially appears. He might be doing you a favor if he divorced you. You shouldn't be made as an adult to do things that you aren't comfortable doing.
If you are really interested in going, could you travel by bus or train to your destination and just meet your husband there?
I don't agree with just drugging yourself out of your mind to go along with what your husband is wanting if you aren't really comfortable doing it. I sense a one-sided relationship here, I'm guessing if the whole story was known, that would surface quickly. You are just as important as your husband in your relationship. If threatened with divorce or he has had it with you, as in the last straw, cut him loose and move on with your life where you won't have to have the stress of a threat of a divorce if you aren't able to accommodate the wishes of your husband.
Anxiety and an unsupportive spouse is a very destructive combo, and can worsen anxiety. Food for thought.
Also, any therapy or medication route you go should be done for your own easement of symptoms, and quality of life increase for yourself. Not to appease a ticked off spouse. Psych meds in particular are a very personal decision, and not something you do for somebody else's convenience.
To me, focusing on the divorce comment is a distraction. The whole question of "am I a bad person for cancelling out 2 days before a major trip" is annoying. I hate it when people (and it's usually women, sorry to say) frame things this way. If you say, "Oh no, you're not a bad person for doing that", then it gives them free reign to make irresponsible and inconsiderate decisions.
I agree with the idea of going to a doctor, explaining the situation and get a few Xanax pills for the trip. If you had said no to the flight originally, it wouldn't be so bad. But good lord, your poor husband made all these plans and you back out NOW?
Also, the fact that you are bringing the final exam up shows that the anxiety might just be an excuse to cancel a trip you didn't really want to go on anyway. Whenever someone gives multiple excuses for something, I think they probably just don't want to do this. These are excuses, not reasons.
OP: I may have misread, but I thought that I read that you often have these feelings, like maybe on the edge and stressed out in general. Is that the case? Maybe this is just making it all a little worse with the added stress of school? I can't help but wonder if your husband is more of a problem here than it initially appears. He might be doing you a favor if he divorced you. You shouldn't be made as an adult to do things that you aren't comfortable doing.
If you are really interested in going, could you travel by bus or train to your destination and just meet your husband there?
I don't agree with just drugging yourself out of your mind to go along with what your husband is wanting if you aren't really comfortable doing it. I sense a one-sided relationship here, I'm guessing if the whole story was known, that would surface quickly. You are just as important as your husband in your relationship. If threatened with divorce or he has had it with you, as in the last straw, cut him loose and move on with your life where you won't have to have the stress of a threat of a divorce if you aren't able to accommodate the wishes of your husband.
I have looked into trains and buses. Trains are too expensive now as it's too close to the data. But a bus is more ok, however it would be at least 36 HOURS. Greyhound. My husband says it is not safe for a woman to travel alone on a Greyhound.
Take a Xanax and get on the plane with your husband.
My gosh, the emotional energy you're putting into this.
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