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We both spend most of the day on the computer. He wakes up first, goes downstairs and reads the paper. He comes back upstairs when he is done (where the office is) and turns on his computer. Then he may go back downstairs to the library to read for a bit. He may run errands if he needs to. Has lunch. Then he heads back upstairs and plays Civilization on the computer until he goes downstairs to cook dinner. That is when he turns off his computer.
I wake up, go downstairs to read the paper. Then I may do some work in the kitchen before heading up to the office. I spend most of the day on the computer visiting this message board, FB, and a few other places. I also sell on eBay. I do creative things on the computer (with the photos I have taken and in the middle of writing a book). I also play games. Yup-I multitask. In fact, at this moment, I have 9 windows open. I get lunch and bring it up here and then go down to eat dinner and only then do I turn off the computer.
Even though we are both on the computer, we are in the same room.
My hubby used to spend 20hrs (literally because he wasnt working) daily on the computer gaming... He did it before marriage but not as badly. I hated it but he wasnt going to change. I essentially became a single mom. When our marriage took a turn for the worse ( not related to the gaming).... I looked at him and said " In our divorce, im going to leave you with the 1 thing you love more than me, your precious computer". When we were going through that period, he FINALLY woke up and got better.
The gaming has almost stopped now. He will get on for an hour, maybe 3 IF nothing else is going on and everything else is done.
We both spend most of the day on the computer. He wakes up first, goes downstairs and reads the paper. He comes back upstairs when he is done (where the office is) and turns on his computer. Then he may go back downstairs to the library to read for a bit. He may run errands if he needs to. Has lunch. Then he heads back upstairs and plays Civilization on the computer until he goes downstairs to cook dinner. That is when he turns off his computer.
I wake up, go downstairs to read the paper. Then I may do some work in the kitchen before heading up to the office. I spend most of the day on the computer visiting this message board, FB, and a few other places. I also sell on eBay. I do creative things on the computer (with the photos I have taken and in the middle of writing a book). I also play games. Yup-I multitask. In fact, at this moment, I have 9 windows open. I get lunch and bring it up here and then go down to eat dinner and only then do I turn off the computer.
Even though we are both on the computer, we are in the same room.
Cat
sounds like living together but not much interaction? How do you earn your money?
I could not live like that. But to each their own.
I hardly touch my computer at home. I prefer the outdoors/books/tv/doing stuff together.
Compromise. On certain days he ignores the computer and spends time with you. Couples time.
I think this is on the right track. Why not try to pick up a controller and spend some time gaming with him? In exchange he spends some time watching tv or talking to you?
This really doesn't seem that hard, yet it vexes a few couples I know. I'm a gamer, and my wife isn't. That said, she tends to watch tv shows and movies I don't watch, but if there's something we both like we'll watch it together.
sounds like living together but not much interaction? How do you earn your money?
I could not live like that. But to each their own.
I hardly touch my computer at home. I prefer the outdoors/books/tv/doing stuff together.
We are both retired and we do A LOT of interacting. This is our days when we are home. And the eBay business is both of ours-even though I do all the computer stuff with that, he is the shipping department as well as the finance department. But, we travel. Last month we got back from our annual extended trip to Puerto Rico. When the weather gets nicer, we will take out our camper van visit other places. We also entertain a lot.
He has no interest in sex. Doesn't even want oral or even a massage. He was like this with ex wife also. He has always been the same with gaming (and drinking)....always some sort of gaming either on his phone
or on the computer.
My husband is also a gamer and is 44. Has always been a gamer. It started to bother me as well. I have to say though, my husband is a hard worker and does a lot around the house. He usually games at night, but sometimes during the day on the weekend and that's what makes me mad. His gaming is what got me hooked on CD! When he's gaming I'm on here. However, we have talked and he has significantly reduced his time gaming.
Now.....my husband has NEVER turned down sex! That would really bother me and I'm not sure we could be truly happy if he had no interest in that! OP, you either need to get into couples counseling or take a good look at the big picture and see if you can live with this type of relationship long term. HUGS!
You chose an apple but wanted it to change into a pear.
Wrong!
Move on if you can't handle it.
Quote:
Originally Posted by jojo775
He has no interest in sex. Doesn't even want oral or even a massage. He was like this with ex wife also. He has always been the same with gaming (and drinking)....always some sort of gaming either on his phone
or on the computer.
I agree w/ funymann. YOU knew how he was, but chose to still continue dating & even (yikes!) marry him, so this is YOUR fault & now you're complaining to us now, looking for answers. Like they say, "a leopard doesn't change his spots!" PLUS, you knew that he already was like this w/ an ex-wife on top of it?!
How can you think he will miraculously change?! And don't tell me because you thought you were so gorgeous, sexy, special, & irresistible that you thought once he married you, that all that gaming would fly out the window.
Your situation's no different from...
...a woman thinking a womanizer will change. The next woman always thinks he won't cheat on her, even though he did on all the women before her. Aye, aye, aye!
...a woman thinking a druggie will change.
...a woman thinking a gambler will change.
...a woman thinking an alcoholic will change.
Stop me when you get the picture.
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This is our days when we are home. And the eBay business is both of ours-even though I do all the computer stuff with that, he is the shipping department as well as the finance department. But, we travel. Last month we got back from our annual extended trip to Puerto Rico. When the weather gets nicer, we will take out our camper van visit other places. We also entertain a lot. 
