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Thanks for your thoughts and a well written response. I think there is a lot of truth to what you're saying ...
There may be a lot of truth about HIS situation in what he was saying, but there is too much projection going on in his post to take his advice to heart.
It sounds like your family is actually made of decent people, compared to that poster's hot mess express, and you recognize that your GF really has a problem.
As far as your touting the MGTOW crap, well, if that's really the way you want to go, then .
There may be a lot of truth about HIS situation in what he was saying, but there is too much projection going on in his post to take his advice to heart.
It sounds like your family is actually made of decent people, compared to that poster's hot mess express, and you recognize that your GF really has a problem.
As far as your touting the MGTOW crap, well, if that's really the way you want to go, then .
That would be quite a loss to women of this world. I'm not sure im ready for such a big step that would hurt so many.
I think my family is mostly decent, ive never really had issues with them, had decent childhood, no drugs or addictions or abuse or anything like that. We mostly get along and love each other and that why its natural for me to want my GF (whose family is in another country) become part of my family, as we start our own life as married couple etc etc. WHile this last part is not a necessity by any stretch, I still need all these people in my life simultenously, that's why I asked for my GF to be cordial and polite at least. We sometimes dotn see my family for months at a time, how hard can it be to be decent to someone for a couple hours, few times a year?
That would be quite a loss to women of this world. I'm not sure im ready for such a big step that would hurt so many.
Eh?
You forgot the sarcasm emoji?
It's time to step up and handle this. You can't stay on the sidelines forever. It sounds like you said what needed to be said; now it's time to follow through. If you want to wait till she spoils Memorial Day, I guess that's a risk you want to take.
I talked with my GF yesterday and it didn't go too well. I basically told her that I don't want a future or kids or anything with someone who will go out of their way to be petty and nasty towards my family not to mention disrespectful towards me. The first part sucks but is likely manageable, but the second part is a deal breaker. If she has no respect for me as demonstrated, this relationship has no chance. I guess my mom was on the phone with her for 40 minutes and I don't think that went very well either.
I'm glad you confronted her. Good job. :thumbsup:
So when you berated her, she called YOUR MOTHER? For what? To b**** her out?
Doesn't she have any people of her own to ask for advice?
That not true, Ive dated all types of women over the years and this type of pettiness keeps re-surfacing over an dover. Never seen a real man do anything close to it. Maybe MGTOW really is the best way to go for a sensible man?
And here we go, the real point of the thread....
Go on your own way, OP. I assure you, no one will miss you.
Shouting matches? Running out of parties to cheers? Trash talking your family members to other family members?
If she's anywhere close to your age, she's not going to change. No matter how many conversations you have. You've tried that in the past, and she went right on doing what she's doing.
Adding children to this mess would be horrible for them.
Quote:
Originally Posted by ReturnOfTheMack2017
That not true, Ive dated all types of women over the years and this type of pettiness keeps re-surfacing over an dover. Never seen a real man do anything close to it.
My husband is right in the middle of a crazy high-school-ish drama fest started by a 55 year old man. He's dealing with it by getting the heck out of it, which is the only serious way to deal with drama kings. Any engagement just escalates it. Like the saying about wrestling with pigs - you get covered in mud and the pig loves it.
Status:
"I don't understand. But I don't care, so it works out."
(set 2 days ago)
35,588 posts, read 17,927,273 times
Reputation: 50621
ReturnoftheMack - I think this is good that it's coming to a head. I don't know what all the history is, but MAN, that's bad at a party that your girlfriend started telling a friend of your sister's that your sister is gossiping about them. And then to say negative things publicly about your dad. The truth of what she did at the party is so much worse than I had imagined.
Did your mom call her to make peace or get some kind of clarity? Did she call your mom? How did that start?
I think you should take your mom and your girlfriend out to lunch, you host, and say I love you two so much let's see if we can come up with some ground rules to make this relationship work. Don't invite everyone so your GF feels ganged up on. Just your mom and your GF.
And start the conversation with, "what can I do to help your relationship work"?
Best wishes. A LOT of men are in your situation, and they just sit there and let the women shred each other because hey, it's not about them. You're the one with the power here, actually, because your family loves you and your girlfriend love you.
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