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OK wait so I am confused. Like if you are sitting at the dinner table:
"Please pass the salt MARY"
"Thank you MARY"
"I'm going to the men's room MARY"
"I would like dessert how about you MARY?
"Can I come in for a nightcap MARY?"
"Thanks for the nice evening MARY"
I mean I don't get it. Like, "Hey Mary how are you?". Then how many more times do you need him to say your name in that conversation or through out the evening? Or even "Hi beautiful how was your day?" You feel disrespected because he didn't say "Hi Mary"?
Oh no...I can see where this is going if we follow to its natural conclusion.
"May I have a kiss MARY?"
"May I..... you MARY?"
Thanx for your answer. When I make friends if we start to see each other often they use my name . Maybe its my fault that I expect too much too soon but I just didn't wanted this to become a bigger issue. Now i'm so confused and don't know what to do. I know I'm not perfect but also can't hide what I feel.
I think really, we're all confused.
Could you post say a likely conversation, like what you would say, and then what he'd say? I think we're all mixed up.
To me, if he's calling you out from a group of people, than it's appropriate to use your name, and not appropriate to yell "YO" and expect to get your attention.
But I'm having a hard time understanding the 'hurt' if it's just the 2 of you, and he's not saying your name all the time. It's just the 2 of you...you know who he's talking to...
Could you post say a likely conversation, like what you would say, and then what he'd say? I think we're all mixed up.
To me, if he's calling you out from a group of people, than it's appropriate to use your name, and not appropriate to yell "YO" and expect to get your attention.
But I'm having a hard time understanding the 'hurt' if it's just the 2 of you, and he's not saying your name all the time. It's just the 2 of you...you know who he's talking to...
I don't know. I'm confused here. lol
I mean ... MAYBE she's just wanting more intimacy, and his using her name would be an indicator of that.
Could you post say a likely conversation, like what you would say, and then what he'd say? I think we're all mixed up.
To me, if he's calling you out from a group of people, than it's appropriate to use your name, and not appropriate to yell "YO" and expect to get your attention.
But I'm having a hard time understanding the 'hurt' if it's just the 2 of you, and he's not saying your name all the time. It's just the 2 of you...you know who he's talking to...
I don't know. I'm confused here. lol
I understand your confusion. So simple example:
I say: Hi John
He: Hi
ME: Do you wanna eat something?
He: No, I'm not hungry
Me: Ok, I get it....
I have been married 15 years...my husband never calls me by my name. He just starts talking to me. I know who I am.
Mae
sooo, how does that make you feel? Are you planning to go to a counselor to talk about it? Was he always like that or did it slowly become a bad habit that turned into the big issue OP wants to avoid?
sooo, how does that make you feel? Are you planning to go to a counselor to talk about it? Was he always like that or did it slowly become a bad habit that turned into the big issue OP wants to avoid?
Seriously? Is that what you got out of my post? I don't care that he does not call me by my name. I know when he his talking to me...and I him. She has known the guy 3 WEEKS. What guy wants to be lectured about silly stuff? She is certainly quick to be "disrespected". ��
If the OP dislikes him not using her name..she needs to move along.
Probably once per conversation would be enough, don't you think? Do you really think the OP is asking for something extreme? I don't believe you do. This is just a typical C-D response of taking things to extremes.
Probably something like, "Hi, Jane" at the beginning of a conversation at the gym, say, would be enough. Vs. simply walking up to her and saying "Hey" every time. Maybe she doesn't like being called "Hey". If that's a thing with her, it's an effortless adjustment to make. She's not asking him to part the Red Sea for her. It's not unreasonable.
Apparently, if you read further on this is EXACTLY what she wants.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Firewithin
So, that's the thing. Instead of using my name he'll be like:
"Please pass the salt"
"Thank you "
"I'm going to the men's room "
"I would like dessert how about you ?
"Can I come in for a nightcap ?"
"Thanks for the nice evening "
He's just talking like that, never using my name. I find that really weird too since I will talk to people the way you mention in your example.
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you MARY?"
