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I have not dated in years as I have been busy raising a child and going to grad school following a divorce. In addition, I moved around a lot.
My friend encouraged me to join a dating site and I did. I met a man and we have been talking and texting for quite a few months. We reside in different states from one another.
This man will be in town this week and is speaking at two conferences (maybe a third too) and it was implied that I would spend the weekend with him. Now he told me that he does not take dates to his conferences because they have gotten mad at him because he is unable to pay attention to the date. I am outgoing so I doubt this would bother me. Whatever.
I asked when we can get together and he said, "I was thinking Saturday for lunch." I am irritated because I was under the impression we were closer than that.
In his defense, I mentioned that I had only ever "been with" six men due to being in long term relationships and that I am nervous to jump in the sack (basically). He said well let's take it slow if you are conflicted, and then when you come to visit me we can go to dinner, talk, laugh and have fun. We can get to know each other better.
I have asked two close male friends and they both said to go to lunch with him. One stated something fishy is going on and the other suggested he wants to take it slow.
I feel hurt and confused because I have become a Saturday lunch girl instead of the the event date and evening lady. I have been told I look very young (I am 46) and that I am beautiful by many people including teenagers. He has only seen my pictures and says the same. He is about ten years my senior and looks 20 years my senior, but I really like him.
Should I go to lunch with him? Another issue is my son has a sports tournament on Saturday at 11:30 AM so it would need to be a late lunch. Also, I don't want to drive the 56 miles to meet him around his hotel. If he is going to make me the Saturday lunch girl he can drive and meet in the middle.
Any insight from men and women would be much appreciated!
Lunch is perfect. That way it is not awkward if you find there is no connection when you first meet. And there is a good chance there won't be. Texting isn't the same. Planning a whole weekend with someone you've never met just sounds insane to me.
I just drove 40 miles to meet a man for lunch Monday. It was fine.
Lunch is perfect. That way it is not awkward if you find there is no connection when you first meet. And there is a good chance there won't be. Texting isn't the same. Planning a whole weekend with someone you've never met just sounds insane to me.
I just drove 40 miles to meet a man for lunch Monday. It was fine.
Exactly, that's why I asked if they ever met in person. If they didn't, I can't see spending a weekend together. Nothing wrong with meeting in person for the first time and having lunch.
Lunch is perfect. That way it is not awkward if you find there is no connection when you first meet. And there is a good chance there won't be. Texting isn't the same. Planning a whole weekend with someone you've never met just sounds insane to me.
I just drove 40 miles to meet a man for lunch Monday. It was fine.
Thank you! We just feel closer than this, but I am demanding!
How'd your date go?
Exactly, that's why I asked if they ever met in person. If they didn't, I can't see spending a weekend together. Nothing wrong with meeting in person for the first time and having lunch.
Thank you...we do talk a lot, so I figure at least dinner. I guess I am so new to this that I have unrealistic expectations.
Thank you...we do talk a lot, so I figure at least dinner. I guess I am so new to this that I have unrealistic expectations.
I think it's normal to feel that but do keep it realistic I've had great conversations with people then in person all the chemistry was gone. Sometimes it just happens.
For me, the best thing is to not have expectations. Let things happen naturally. See how lunch goes then take it from there. Maybe lunch will turn into dinner
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I've had great conversations with people then in person all the chemistry was gone. Sometimes it just happens.
