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On the surface, sure, it seems like that's it. But what you're really doing is fending off any potential interaction AND absolving yourself of any responsibility for relationships.
No one asked you to tell us time and time and time again how ugly you are. You just keep coming here and repeating it, like it's a compulsion. Reading back through your posts, which is very easy to do with a laptop and CD's "search" function, it's like you think that literally is all there is to say about you.
Multiple people have offered examples over the years of truly ugly guys who manage to "get women" because they have a personality or outlook that attracts, but you don't really care. You don't appear to be at all interested in change. You seem very comfortable in this little "ugly guy" space you've created.
Of course, you aren't REALLY comfortable, deep down. But you pretend you are.
I mean, reading back over those posts, would you want to spend ANY time with a person who would write that kind of stuff about themselves? I wouldn't.
At some point you are gonna have to take a risk and let go of this idea that your looks are what's keeping you from love.
There's some on here that just have some massive self-esteem issues going on. The only way to get past that is to do something about it. I hesitate to even try to tell them that though because they fixate on the "woe is me" so much they refuse to hear anything but that. I know, I've been there, but a key difference is I also don't go around thinking I'm some hideous quasimodo. I just grew up in an area where I stuck out like a sore thumb and that got to me over time.
But you know what I did that these guys refuse to do for themselves? I got the hell over it!! Especially when it came to women. I just started talking to them and you know what, you win some, you lose some, but if you never try you don't get anywhere regardless. But they have to want it, and they don't. As you so succinctly pointed out, you can read it with every post they make. It's a true self-fulfilling prophecy because even when they have a chance to get a woman's interest they find a way to sabotage themselves just so they can reinforce their already negative opinion of themselves. And that kind of mindset you just cannot reason with.
I wish those guys the best, but until *they* want to change themselves, it won't make a difference what they're told. They won't look beyond their box of misery that they're so comfortable in.
I am not afraid to talk to men... there are just some men ( who approach me) that I don't want to talk to.
If they want to take it as a sign that I am afraid to talk to them.... it's all good. A win for them and a win for me.
I am not afraid to talk to men... there are just some men ( who approach me) that I don't want to talk to.
If they want to take it as a sign that I am afraid to talk to them.... it's all good. A win for them and a win for me.
If they weren't so scary, you'd probably want to talk to them.
There's some on here that just have some massive self-esteem issues going on. The only way to get past that is to do something about it. I hesitate to even try to tell them that though because they fixate on the "woe is me" so much they refuse to hear anything but that. I know, I've been there, but a key difference is I also don't go around thinking I'm some hideous quasimodo. I just grew up in an area where I stuck out like a sore thumb and that got to me over time.
Over the years we've seen this particular compulsion a lot. It's like, 5-6 different guys. Some come back again and again under different usernames, but some have kept the same handle for awhile.
Like WMs said, they post nothing but self-flagellating posts. They contribute little else. I came to the conclusion some time ago that there is some form of perverse pleasure in this. They humiliate and debase themselves before us, and get off on the response. Some have admitted this compulsion.
They don't want help at all. It's odd but maybe it helps them somehow.
Over the years we've seen this particular compulsion a lot. It's like, 5-6 different guys. Some come back again and again under different usernames, but some have kept the same handle for awhile.
Like WMs said, they post nothing but self-flagellating posts. They contribute little else. I came to the conclusion some time ago that there is some form of perverse pleasure in this. They humiliate and debase themselves before us, and get off on the response. Some have admitted this compulsion.
They don't want help at all. It's odd but maybe it helps them somehow.
I think they get a kick out of clapping each other's backs in commiseration. It's empowering to know someone else out there is -just -like -them.
I have seen a lot of threads on forums about women marrying men they're not physically attracted to but settled for because they liked their personalities and ended up getting divorced.
I imagine that happens a decent amount. It is something I'd be worried about
You have to get a date first before you can start talking about marriage.
Over the years we've seen this particular compulsion a lot. It's like, 5-6 different guys. Some come back again and again under different usernames, but some have kept the same handle for awhile.
Like WMs said, they post nothing but self-flagellating posts. They contribute little else. I came to the conclusion some time ago that there is some form of perverse pleasure in this. They humiliate and debase themselves before us, and get off on the response. Some have admitted this compulsion.
They don't want help at all. It's odd but maybe it helps them somehow.
Quoted for truth.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Foggy HalfNelson
There's some on here that just have some massive self-esteem issues going on. The only way to get past that is to do something about it. I hesitate to even try to tell them that though because they fixate on the "woe is me" so much they refuse to hear anything but that. I know, I've been there, but a key difference is I also don't go around thinking I'm some hideous quasimodo. I just grew up in an area where I stuck out like a sore thumb and that got to me over time.
But you know what I did that these guys refuse to do for themselves? I got the hell over it!! Especially when it came to women. I just started talking to them and you know what, you win some, you lose some, but if you never try you don't get anywhere regardless. But they have to want it, and they don't. As you so succinctly pointed out, you can read it with every post they make. It's a true self-fulfilling prophecy because even when they have a chance to get a woman's interest they find a way to sabotage themselves just so they can reinforce their already negative opinion of themselves. And that kind of mindset you just cannot reason with.
I wish those guys the best, but until *they* want to change themselves, it won't make a difference what they're told. They won't look beyond their box of misery that they're so comfortable in.
I don't know how to answer your question, but i suggest that if you find her attractive, talk to her.
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