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I would like to share this very awkward moment of my life. I'm a 19 year-old college girl and my brother is 23 yrs old. He's been dating his gf for 2 months now and they get along fine. His gf has already been introduced more than twice. However, there is one problem. Not sure if to call it a problem or not.
I've known his gf several years back in school. I have to admit my friends and I weren't quite friendly to her from 4th to 6th grade. Do you think she can still be hurt 7 years later?
We greeted each other after all these years and she seemed ok with talking to me. I forgot about her till my bf mentioned her name. Is there a point where the subject will come up? Today for example we were sitting on the table (all of us) and suddenly the my brother mentioned that it's a coincidence she went to my same grade school and never met. She said it was a coincidence and then winked at me with a smile.
She is probably wary of you. She may not respect as much because of the past. Maybe if she brings it up, or you talk about a related subject you can bring it up and apologize. That will mean a lot to her. I was bullied, and if I were dating the bullies brother, then I'd be a little self-conscious around them (the bully). Although, I'd realize that we are all adults and people change. An apology would be nice.
If she winked at you and smiled, she obviously remembers. Maybe she's over it. I'd wait for a good moment, when things seem cool between you, and I'd say something like, "I'm glad you're dating my brother. You're such a cool girl. I was such a jerk when we were in school. I'm sorry about that."
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Today for example we were sitting on the table (all of us) and suddenly the my brother mentioned that it's a coincidence she went to my same grade school and never met. She said it was a coincidence and then winked at me with a smile.
Why in the world didn't you just say that, yes, you did know each other in school?
I know you can't answer for her but at least it sounds like she was willing to just let the subject die
Just seems like a mountain/mole hill thing.
I was a bullied child. One of my favorite moments from my 20-year high school reunion was looking into the face of a guy who did a lot worse than just bully me, and just smiling broadly at him. He was completely unnerved and couldn't meet my eyes. I think he could feel that I found him ridiculous - he's now a bloated and pasty guy with a ginormous diamond earring in his ear that would have made P-Diddy jealous. and he was about a decade too early for a midlife crisis, so I'm not sure what that was about. I was literally biting back a laugh when I saw him. I kind of walked away feeling rejuvenated. Yeah, there was a certain amount of schadenfreude to see him looking kind of pathetic.
Ya know, I don't think much about the people who bullied me - they don't signify. I've gone on to have a pretty successful and happy life. If you were just mean and not particularly destructive, she probably finds you somewhat amusing. HOwever, you're still young enough for it to be kinda fresh for her. Clear the air by apologizing. And maybe consider what flaws in your character allowed you to become a bully and then work on those.
Why in the world didn't you just say that, yes, you did know each other in school?
I know you can't answer for her but at least it sounds like she was willing to just let the subject die
Just seems like a mountain/mole hill thing.
It didn't feel like the right moment. Several family members were at the table and it would have been a very awkward conversation. I was embarrassed to be honest and still am.
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