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You need to locate where you will have options. Your current location will set you up for disappointment and discourage you, which will impact your confidence, which is not good when it comes to dating.
So advise.. get out and relocate.. focus on yourself.. and actively pursue women.
Yep. Actively searching for work elsewhere. Going to meetup groups in the interim (going to a hiking one, a meditation one, an older singles one (I've been the youngest one there every time, but they're the only "local" (ie, within 50 miles) group that actually meets...), and an assertiveness one, even if I end up spending two hours a day on the road as a result.
either this is an epidemic in this generation, much more common for guys to be entering their 20's and 30's as virgins or never had a girlfriend before, one guy I spoke to, he says that a large portion of guys have died virgins throughout history, it's just that this type of information is more visible now due to the internet and social media, I feel there is definetley some truth to that.
For the Japanese, it is somewhat common.
In the United States, I can't say if it has become more common because I simply don't know enough, but I would surmise based upon what I know that this is true. It is more difficult for the average man to get laid now because there's such a huge surplus of men and women can really drive a hard bargain.
There's a huge underclass of men not getting laid. Many of them are staying home, avoiding social contact, playing video games, and watching pornography.
Given the huge oversupply of men, men really need to raise their game to compete. Video games, porn, and social reclusiveness is the exact opposite of what needs to happen. Guys need to lift weights/play sports, and develop their social skills to be able to get what's out there.
I think the reason that the unsuccessful men in dating retreat to video games and porn is because they have already did what you said multiple times and is hasn't worked. It makes you happier to do what you enjoy instead of failing over and over and you can't have winners without losers.
I would agree with that to an extent. But if you aren't getting it done with attracting women, you've got to double down in the gym in building a phenomenal physique and then work on your in-person approaching.
I agree with you to an extent but when is enough enough?
I think any guy needs to expend the amount of energy necessary in order to have success in attracting and having sex with women. It's just that important. It's a biological need.
Salt Lake City seems like it'd be a bad place to date for non-Mormons. Oversupply of men + not belonging to the dominant culture + subpar nightlife options = Mostly Awful. In a place like SLC, I think someone would need a good social circle to date in SLC, but if you aren't Mormon it might be hard to establish the social circle.
I think dating in Salt Lake City would probably be pretty easy for Mormons. You'd pair off early and start having kids.
Salt Lake City seems like it'd be a bad place to date for non-Mormons. Oversupply of men + not belonging to the dominant culture + subpar nightlife options = Mostly Awful. In a place like SLC, I think someone would need a good social circle to date in SLC, but if you aren't Mormon it might be hard to establish the social circle.
I think dating in Salt Lake City would probably be pretty easy for Mormons. You'd pair off early and start having kids.
I think you're wrong. Salt Lake City is only 50% Mormon, and not all of them are practicing. The nightlife here is better than you might expect.
I would agree with that to an extent. But if you aren't getting it done with attracting women, you've got to double down in the gym in building a phenomenal physique and then work on your in-person approaching.
Just saying, my problems go way beyond not being super fit.
I actually was (spending about 3 hours a day at the gym 4x a week + hiking on weekends) about 7 years ago.
I'm not at that point nowadays (more like 1 hour a day 3x a week + hiking on weekends) but I'm still in pretty good shape.
Quote:
Originally Posted by RJ312
Salt Lake City seems like it'd be a bad place to date for non-Mormons. Oversupply of men + not belonging to the dominant culture + subpar nightlife options = Mostly Awful. In a place like SLC, I think someone would need a good social circle to date in SLC, but if you aren't Mormon it might be hard to establish the social circle.
Though as for some who
A) Tires early
B) Doesn't drink.
C) Has to commute an hour each way to go to SLC
What are my options for "night life"?
I'm crashing by 10:30 or so, so I'd have to be wrapping up whatever it is by 9:30.
37, M, introverted, not religious, and in a 90% LDS college town. I also don’t drink, which isn’t very popular with the non-LDS crowd. I also have aspergers, which is never good for one’s prospects. On the plus side, I at least own a house and earn over 100k.
Salt Lake City is about an hour away, but I’ve gotten no replies and few messages on dating sites from anyone there (two so far, one much older than me, one with kids)
According to this site, the demographics in SLC are also pretty bleak for a single man my age, with there being 140 single men per 100 single women in the 25-40 range.
I’m kind of clueless as to where to even start. I was (still am) depressed in my 20s and was rejected by everyone who I was interested in, basically gave up looking for much of my 30s to focus on my career (which coincided with the move to Utah). I’m starting to look again, but it feels like I’m just spinning my wheels.
Probably the first step would be to move to somewhere else, but considering the cost of living vs salary, it feels like anywhere I go will be a big step down from what I have now. I’m also an outdoors type, and obvious picks such as Denver have similar (but not as bad) demographics problems. They also seem big into the beer scene and between an alcoholic brother and uncle, and not being able to sleep if I drink at all, that’s not the kind of thing that I’m looking for.
I joined a singles group which I’m about to start going to regularly, but the members are roughly 2/3 male. It’s also an hour away.
I’m kind of clueless about how to even start beyond what I’m already doing, especially at my age. Any advice?
Start a conversation with "hi I'm _____ and I make over 100k a year. Some women will run for the hills but others will have their interest peaked. If you can prove your income and status with fancy business card and or your linked in profile you might catch a good fish. Not all women are looking for a man who makes great money but many are so that could work.
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