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So i have been married for 5 years. I always trusted my husband and never thought he could betray me or disrespect me in amy way shape or form. He's my entire universe. We have 2 kids together.
Last week I stumbled upon 10 plus pictures of a woman his phone while sorting through pics. I checked dates and he started this in September so obviously i don't check his phone or else i would have noticed. I saw the images were from instagram. So i looked at his instagram account. I found he had commented flatterimg things to her. I found he had liked over 50 photos of her since September which is when he started following her. I asked who she was and he said it was a former coworker. He made no private contact with her through messages or texts throughout this time. Some of the photos were sexual, for example one of her sitting on the bathroom sink with her tongue showing in a sexual way and legs wide open. One was her crotch area in pink panties. He commented and liked both of these too. He didnt give any other women attention at all or anyone else om instahram in all this time just her. I think all of our mutual friends saw this and i am embaressed. I asked why he had her pics saved and he said he just like the pictures and it meant nothing. Should i be worried or even upset. Could he be lying to me or himself? It still hurts me but i don't know how to feel about all of this. I'm afraid to overreact and make something out of nothing. Is this consideted disrespectful?
Yes you should be concerned. Your husband is looking at another woman...someone whom he actually knows, for some sort of gratification. Does he also give you the same kind of attention/affirmation he gave the other woman?
Yes you should be concerned. Your husband is looking at another woman...someone whom he actually knows, for some sort of gratification. Does he also give you the same kind of attention/affirmation he gave the other woman?
No not like this and not public anyways. He hasn't commented on a picture of me in 3 years. I am not going to lie i was crazy jealous but i don't want to be psycho. He was upset with the fact i went tgrough his phone. I wasn't intemding on snooping when i was using his phone. He was in the same room as me when i was using it. He's now going above and beyond to give me a lot of attention right now but not then. He deleted his social media accounts bit it still happened 😢
I would be very concerned. I think he'll just hide his extra-curricular activities better from here on out.
Sure, guys are visual and all that, but this is someone he knows and he took the effort to like and comment on explicitly sexual pictures. He basically knows she's a little ho bag and is letting him know he thinks she's hot. Very disrespectful to you and your relationship. He can look all he wants, but expressing approval and interest is another matter.
He deleted his social media accounts bit it still happened 😢
Well, that's a bit of an overreaction, but at least he's trying. But he has to understand that he can be active on social media without being disrespectful to you.
What he did was not cool. It's not about attention. It's about respect. I would have a sit-down with him now, and let him know how it felt to see that he had liked and saved a photo of some woman's crotch. A woman he used to work with!
You can assure him that you don't WANT to snoop or worry about what he's doing. You married him (and he married you) under the assumption that you would forsake all others. So talk about what you both expect from the other.
Besides, most men know that you can look online all day but don't be dumb enough to "like" and definitely don't "save."
No not like this and not public anyways. He hasn't commented on a picture of me in 3 years. I am not going to lie i was crazy jealous but i don't want to be psycho. He was upset with the fact i went tgrough his phone. I wasn't intemding on snooping when i was using his phone. He was in the same room as me when i was using it. He's now going above and beyond to give me a lot of attention right now but not then. He deleted his social media accounts bit it still happened 😢
I think you are right with your concern. And I think you caught it just in time. Doesn't seem to me like they shacked up but he was clearly playing with fire.
Since he gives you a lot of attention now and even deleted his account, he seems sincerely sorry IMO.
If he would have gotten above and beyond to give you grief about snooping and keeps the account up, that would be way more concerning.
Were these photos sent to him privately from her? or are these pics simply posted on pinterest or instagram for friends to see? There is a huge difference.
Although he's going above and beyond to make it up to me. I recently realized it took him messing up to buy me flowers in all our years together. He never bought me any type of jewelry even fake or even gifts msybe 4 gifts tops and he has not expressed an interest in me on social media in 3 years. So it's hard to look past how much attention he gave this woman and saving her pictures too to top ot all off amd tgem to lie to me about the extent he went. He's not with her and she got validation from him for 5 months. I don't know if he's no longer interested in me and just wants to stay for all other reasons besides he's in love with me or finds me attractive and sexy.
Problem here is he had no activity on instagram except for him liking her pics and commenting on them too. It was very easy to see his activity. His lifetime activity was 5 pictures he posted 2 years ago and not a single status update or any likes for anyone else ever. I don't hsbe an instahram account but i have FB and he kept his avtivity very minimal on FB but still loved 5 pics and commenyef on them.
He really needs to put his feeling towards her in perspective but he avoids it like the plague. His response for his behavior is "i didn't notice i was doing it and i felt nothing, she was just a hoe i liked to look at!" Does this sound logical or truthful. Am i looking for something that's not there when i ask what it is tgat made him go do far? To me it looked like an obsession
he liked some pics that are posted on a public site for 100s or 1000s to see. Its not as if he was having an emotional affair with that woman and they were exchanging nakid pics or sexting. I think you are blowing it way out of proportion and if I had to guess, this isnt about this at all. Reminds me of my ex going through my spam email folder and finding some escort ad I have never seen. As if im responsible for what someone spams me with.
Were these photos sent to him privately from her? or are these pics simply posted on pinterest or instagram for friends to see? There is a huge difference.
No she never gave him the time of day. What if she had reciprocated? He askoed fpr her numbrr on her last day working with him. He lied about that too but later admitted the truth to me. If she was nothing like he says then why lie?
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