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So just talking to her like a normal conversation tells her nothing of interest.
A wink,touch of the shoulder/back,following and remembering what she said seems more doable.
Let's not get ahead of ourselves. It's hard enough for me to even be in a place where I think people would be receptive to conversation.
But, to address your points:
Isn't following and remembering what she said part of normal conversation?
While I don't have the same beliefs as some of the anti-feminist types I've seen around here lately, I do wonder if touching--even if it's just the shoulder--might not be a good idea.
I'm sure winking is fine for most. In my case, though, since I can't see most subtle visual cues, I wouldn't want to use them on others.
It could also mean that you've observed some other trait, say a behavior (interacting well with other people, rescuing a kitten, helping an old lady across the street, beating up a bunch of bad guys, busting a sick move on the dance floor, shredding a mean riff on the guitar, telling your favorite team to "never bunt, hit dingers", whatever) that you find interesting.
Especially to the "I'm too ugly crowd", it's not just about your looks.
You're right.
The guy who used to be my next door neighbor is a musician. Just locally at one or two bars nearby. When I first moved here, I'd hear him singing inside his house and playing his guitar. He doesn't have good looks at all. He looks almost exactly like Frank Zappa. And unless women are attracted to Frank Zappa, most women probably aren't gonna be physically attracted to this guy. When I first saw him, I remember thinking ''God, he looks like what Frank Zappa looked like''. And everybody I've told this to, who knows what Zappa looked like, agrees with me. I remember my best friend came over for the first time and saw him before he walked in and was like ''You got Frank Zappa living next door!''. And a lot of people told him he looked like Zappa.
Anyway, he was mid to late 30's at that time and his live-in girlfriend was like 21-22 when I first moved here. And while I don't think she was that attractive, she certainly wasn't unattractive. She was certainly better looking than him. And aside from his musical skills, he really had nothing going for him. His mom owned the house next door and he was living there with this girl and a couple of kids, who were from a different woman/women. I even saw a couple of them come to pick up and drop off the kids and they weren't bad looking either. His only job was as a bartender. I doubt he even made any money off that music gig, at all. I went over there and checked out his guitars one day. I told him I could play pretty good. I'm better at playing than he is, but he can sing and I really can't. I told him that I could play a certain solo, which he doubted and he had me play it, so I did. I kind of showed him up, in front of his girlfriend, who was also shocked that I could play it. He asked for it!
I agree but I figured this is how it would go..We get along amazingly but I'm not attractive enough for her more then likely.. oh well
Come on, man. This has been going on for like 6 months now? At least? I think you pretty much ruined your chances at some point in the last 6 months, when you went around with her and didn't tell her you liked her like that. You never bothered asking her out, you never tried to make a move. She probably knew you liked her. If you would have went for it sometime in the last 6 months, preferably the sooner the better, you might have had a chance with her.
And now you're getting her stuff for Valentine's Day? Come on, dude. The time to let your feelings known was back in August, when you first talked about her on here. Just saying....
Come on, man. This has been going on for like 6 months now? At least? I think you pretty much ruined your chances at some point in the last 6 months, when you went around with her and didn't tell her you liked her like that. You never bothered asking her out, you never tried to make a move. She probably knew you liked her. If you would have went for it sometime in the last 6 months, preferably the sooner the better, you might have had a chance with her.
And now you're getting her stuff for Valentine's Day? Come on, dude. The time to let your feelings known was back in August, when you first talked about her on here. Just saying....
Ehh even then she showed a lot of signs of pulling away and not being interested...from waking up the next morning and keeping her distance physically from me..showing me her dating profile, always mentioning how great a friends we are etc ..Plus our situation is not your average one seeing as how she was married to a friend so she had to know that's why I wasn't overly aggressive from the beginning.
I knew she probably wasn't into me I just had to get it off my chest..
Let's not get ahead of ourselves. It's hard enough for me to even be in a place where I think people would be receptive to conversation.
But, to address your points:
Isn't following and remembering what she said part of normal conversation?
While I don't have the same beliefs as some of the anti-feminist types I've seen around here lately, I do wonder if touching--even if it's just the shoulder--might not be a good idea.
I'm sure winking is fine for most. In my case, though, since I can't see most subtle visual cues, I wouldn't want to use them on others.
1.You would be surprised at how many guys (people don't really listen to each other,too much me me)
2. People do it,we touch,it's natural for humans.I love touching a guys back.
3.You can't see winking?
Come on, man. This has been going on for like 6 months now? At least? I think you pretty much ruined your chances at some point in the last 6 months, when you went around with her and didn't tell her you liked her like that. You never bothered asking her out, you never tried to make a move. She probably knew you liked her. If you would have went for it sometime in the last 6 months, preferably the sooner the better, you might have had a chance with her.
And now you're getting her stuff for Valentine's Day? Come on, dude. The time to let your feelings known was back in August, when you first talked about her on here. Just saying....
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