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Go ahead. Do any of the suggested and alienate her completely.
How about just a "welcome back" and answer her question about your time with your family ( whatever that was about)
You want to question her about anything more personal, make another date and do so in person.
Whatare you waiting a few hours for? Just to 'tit for tat' or show her how disinterested you are?
Go ahead. Do any of the suggested and alienate her completely.
How about just a "welcome back" and answer her question about your time with your family ( whatever that was about)
You want to question her about anything more personal, make another date and do so in person.
Whatare you waiting a few hours for? Just to show her how disinterested you are?
I'll be honest, and this is just how I'd feel about it, personally: If I'd slept with the person, and I felt I might alienate him (in the OP's case, her) just by wanting more than a pal type "hey, how ya doing" type of text after a long pause, then...we're not meant to be. He (she) isn't into it, and I'm moving on.
The OP's already done plenty of tiptoeing and wondering and even posting about this. That hasn't made her draw any closer to him so far, KWIM? In person, over text, doesn't seem to matter, she's putting her head on his shoulder on occasion and otherwise being "meh."
I'll be honest, and this is just how I'd feel about it, personally: If I'd slept with the person, and I felt I might alienate him (in the OP's case, her) just by wanting more than a pal type "hey, how ya doing" type of text after a long pause, then...we're not meant to be. He (she) isn't into it, and I'm moving on.
The OP's already done plenty of tiptoeing and wondering and even posting about this. That hasn't made her draw any closer to him so far, KWIM? In person, over text, doesn't seem to matter, she's putting her head on his shoulder on occasion and otherwise being "meh."
Don't recall suggesting he tip toe.
Quite the opposite. But almost every other thread about discussing more personal things say "in person" Why should this be different?
There's also more often that not, no disagreement about someone wanting to take it slow.
Now,she should be kicked to the curb for doing so?
Don't recall suggesting he tip toe.
Quite the opposite. But almost every other thread about discussing more personal things say "in person" Why should this be different?
There's also more often that not, no disagreement about someone wanting to take it slow.
Now,she should be kicked to the curb for doing so?
"Should" she be...well, I was saying what I would do. OP has already been tiptoeing. There are several threads about this already.
Sure, he can discuss this in person. The fact that he hasn't already, including with the head on the shoulder but pulling away thing, is part of that tiptoeing.
And as I said, obviously, she's not responding either way. Not the way OP wants her to.
I didn't say automatically kick her to the curb. I said I'd do one of TWO things. One was: directly asking her. And my point was: if after the sleeping and the whole thing, just asking this question will "alienate" her, then he was already on thin ice and she was just looking for a reason to go...IMO. Not all by itself but in conjunction with the hot-and-cold stuff, excuses, and so on.
I'll be honest, and this is just how I'd feel about it, personally: If I'd slept with the person, and I felt I might alienate him (in the OP's case, her) just by wanting more than a pal type "hey, how ya doing" type of text after a long pause, then...we're not meant to be. He (she) isn't into it, and I'm moving on.
The OP's already done plenty of tiptoeing and wondering and even posting about this. That hasn't made her draw any closer to him so far, KWIM? In person, over text, doesn't seem to matter, she's putting her head on his shoulder on occasion and otherwise being "meh."
You nailed it JerZ. It doesn't matter what he does, because for the time being she's calling the shots. All the OP can do is decide if he's fine with her calling the shots and making the decisions. He's trying to decide what's reasonable and what's unreasonable. I don't think it's about her being busy, she may like the OP, but not enough to stop seeking others. They're also not exclusive, but that doesn't exclude how the OP feels. If I was the OP, I'd just dial it back and take it casual with her, while seeing others. It very well may or may not work out, but you don't want to have all your eggs in one basket when you're seeing someone and they're just "meh" about you. You will undoubtedly be the one that gets hurt, because you're overinvested compared to the other party. Been there, done that, got the t-shirt.
Having sex does not automatically equate to exclusivity. That tired narrative needs to be retired. It discourages people from having an actual conversation. "We've had sex, now you're my bf/gf."
Part of me wants to text her getting some degree of closure.
Part of me wants to just confront her since I've been to her place too but that's obsessive lol. I'm just allowing myself to get the angry emotions out of me here.
When someone shows you who they are....believe them.
Having sex does not automatically equate to exclusivity. That tired narrative needs to be retired. It discourages people from having an actual conversation. "We've had sex, now you're my bf/gf."
Yeah no.
It doesn't, but to me (this is just me), if I've had sex with the person and I still can't ask them how they feel about me, something's wrong.
That's not necessarily asking for exclusivity, though.
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It doesn't, but to me (this is just me), if I've had sex with the person and I still can't ask them how they feel about me, something's wrong.
.
If you'll go back and read, the whole thing was about a text...about asking her about such things in response to her TEXT.
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One was: directly asking her. 
