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I have been seeing this guy for about a month now but we have been talking on and off for about 9 months. He was there for me through my rough patch with my ex and was very concerned and cared about my well-being. Every time we see each other it's after work and we stay together for 5 or 6 hours before he heads home. We keep in contact every day and I am getting really good vibes that he likes me. He does things like hold the door open for me, he pays for my dinner, when we eat at my house he helps me cook and does all the dishes, he takes his boots off before coming into my house without being asked or feeling pressured to, he loves playing with my dog, he talks to me about his day at work, his family, and his friends, he has told his friends about me, etc. When we are together all we do is laugh and his smile just lights up my whole day. His eyes smile when he smiles, it's amazing and gets me every time. He is a very respectful guy, which is something I am not used to. We greet with a hug and depart with a hug. And, the hugs have gotten better and tighter. If you have read my other threads, I can tell you that he is opening up more and getting more comfortable each time we see each other, we've been cooking at my house now!
My question is: why hasn't he made a move yet? I'm not talking about sex...I'm talking about just simply cuddling on the couch while watching a movie. I have dropped tons of hints, I even get really close to him on the couch but he doesn't pull me in closer. I have even flat out texted him that I am wanting cuddles more than ever lately, to which he replied "awww i'm sorry" yet still no cuddles. I know he is a cuddly guy because before we met he would always mention cuddling and that he's a big teddy bear. I'm not sure what else to do...
I'm not sure.
I would say it could be miscommunication but you explicitly texted him what you wanted -- so I don't think it's that. Also the suggestion of asking him on a date seems unnecessary if you're already cooking meals and spending hours in each other's homes. Only thing I can suggest is be a bit more patient. He may be the type who if he sees something too good to be true his instinct may be to recoil.
@OP, he certainly seems to like you. Maybe he's afraid of getting attached too quickly if the relationship becomes more intimate.
I know he has been hurt really bad in his past relationships. And since his last relationship, he has dated a few girls who lied to him and hurt him so it's possible that he is afraid of getting hurt again. But, at the same time, he knows what I've been through and quite honestly, i'm afraid of getting hurt again as well. Time will tell but I just don't know if I should take the initiative or let him do it when he is ready.
Jeez the most obvious answer right in post #2 and it gets completely ignored. OP, if you want this guy in an intimate way, make the first move already. If you really want to make this guy's day, make it a really bold first move.
I know he has been hurt really bad in his past relationships. And since his last relationship, he has dated a few girls who lied to him and hurt him so it's possible that he is afraid of getting hurt again. But, at the same time, he knows what I've been through and quite honestly, i'm afraid of getting hurt again as well. Time will tell but I just don't know if I should take the initiative or let him do it when he is ready.
If I were in your shoes, I'd try to initiate it with him by saying "Can I cuddle with you?" (Or just doing it)
If he's not ready for it then, let him initiate it when he's ready.
Gee, it sounds like a normal good progress. If I were you, I would say right out something like "hey, I am attracted to you and I would like our relationship to go further - how do you feel about this?"
It sounds to me like you are both discovering that you really like each other. Discovering this before getting physical seems to me like a good recipe for a good relationship.
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