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Old 07-06-2018, 03:05 AM
 
3 posts, read 832 times
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So basically my friend and his sister came to my house saying they needed to talk to me about my girlfriend. So they began to tell me all the things she’s done like sending nudes to other guys and stuff like that but they never showed me any evidence and this was all stuff they heard. So after they left I told my girlfriend to come over so we can talk and we’ve been together for a year and 7 months and I’ve never had a issue or any previous problem with cheating and I’ve been cheated on before so I know the signs and none are or were present. So she tells me that if she was doing all those things then there should be evidence. There was no messages no pictures or screenshots none of that so we talked about it for 4 hours and we’re still together. Did I make the right decision?
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Old 07-06-2018, 05:19 AM
 
Location: Florida
18,298 posts, read 18,560,123 times
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3rd hand gossip? No, you don't take it as truth.
But, question. What is prompting other people to be gossiping about what your girlfriend is doing?
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Old 07-06-2018, 05:20 AM
 
3,118 posts, read 1,731,704 times
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Where there is smoke, there is fire. There's still no proof from what you've said that there is actually smoke.
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Old 07-06-2018, 06:01 AM
 
2,962 posts, read 2,875,781 times
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Does your friend and sister get along with your girlfriend? There could be some immature motivation to break you up. However, I'd be aware that the accusations might be true, but don't dwell on it. If there's no evidence there, I'd think about why someone would make a claim like that. And if there is evidence, then prepared to face the truth.

From there, it gets difficult. Did she do this before you met? Did she continue to do it after you met? How long ago did this happen? There's a lot of factors.

In this day and age, with everything being saved in perpetuity, I'd be surprised evidence would ultimately not find its way to you. If you see nothing, then there's likely nothing.
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Old 07-06-2018, 06:11 AM
 
Location: USA
13,482 posts, read 7,331,651 times
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I would not have confronted her until I saw proof personally. Now you just seem insecure to her. Not a good way to be in a relationship. If there is proof, just end it quickly, and move on.
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Old 07-06-2018, 10:12 PM
 
Location: Auckland, New Zealand
5,513 posts, read 2,596,808 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Pilot1 View Post
I would not have confronted her until I saw proof personally. Now you just seem insecure to her. Not a good way to be in a relationship. If there is proof, just end it quickly, and move on.
Yeah. Never let on you have been alerted until you have total proof.

Now you need to investigate your friend and his sister.
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Old 07-08-2018, 12:44 PM
 
Location: Central Florida
124 posts, read 37,622 times
Reputation: 686
My friend told me my fiancée was cheating. Turned out she was right and is now my ex fiancée. Friend told me that my girlfriend was having sex with another of our friends, he was right and she became my ex girlfriend. In my opinion it depends on the source of the information. In my case it was two trusted friends and I felt their sorrow for me when they told me. Where there is smoke and all that. The problem some have is that they do not want to believe it because not believing it is better than the consequences of the truth.

I worked with a married women who had a steady boyfriend and went through most of the guys at work just to feel that she could. I declined even though she was insistent. I asked about her husband as it is difficult to hide something like she was doing. All she said is that he choses to look the other way rather than know for sure and have to get a divorce. This wife would tell her husband that she was going away to a conference that did not exists so she could spend a full week with her boyfriend. All her husband had to do is call the hotel and ask for her or call work. He just waited for her to call him. I used to spend months overseas and my wife never once checked to verify that I was where I said I was. She always waited for me to call. Even though nothing ever happened, my wife was fond of saying that what the eyes do not see, the heart cannot feel. I think many of us know wives and husbands who are cheating and cannot figure out why their spouse does not know.

Last edited by vinnyfl; 07-08-2018 at 12:57 PM..
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Old 07-08-2018, 01:12 PM
 
15,871 posts, read 13,450,218 times
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Who are these other people talking to your friend and sister? Surely they are friends with your girlfriend too...and in a position to know things you do not.
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Old 07-08-2018, 01:30 PM
 
8,225 posts, read 6,564,451 times
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Pretty easy to find out for yourself if the information you have been presented with by third parties is accurate...it just takes a little investigation on your behalf.
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Old 07-08-2018, 01:40 PM
 
3 posts, read 832 times
Reputation: 10
Default Response

Quote:
Originally Posted by vinnyfl View Post
My friend told me my fiancée was cheating. Turned out she was right and is now my ex fiancée. Friend told me that my girlfriend was having sex with another of our friends, he was right and she became my ex girlfriend. In my opinion it depends on the source of the information. In my case it was two trusted friends and I felt their sorrow for me when they told me. Where there is smoke and all that. The problem some have is that they do not want to believe it because not believing it is better than the consequences of the truth.

I worked with a married women who had a steady boyfriend and went through most of the guys at work just to feel that she could. I declined even though she was insistent. I asked about her husband as it is difficult to hide something like she was doing. All she said is that he choses to look the other way rather than know for sure and have to get a divorce. This wife would tell her husband that she was going away to a conference that did not exists so she could spend a full week with her boyfriend. All her husband had to do is call the hotel and ask for her or call work. He just waited for her to call him. I used to spend months overseas and my wife never once checked to verify that I was where I said I was. She always waited for me to call. Even though nothing ever happened, my wife was fond of saying that what the eyes do not see, the heart cannot feel. I think many of us know wives and husbands who are cheating and cannot figure out why their spouse does not know.
That’s the thing she’s never seemed suspicious. She always wants to see me, hangout all the time, go places, puts us on social media. There’s no hiding us or telling me she doesn’t want to hangout or anything. We have each other’s location. She’s always where she says she is, but my closest friend is telling otherwise but it doesn’t make any sense. Like I’ve said I’ve been cheated on and there were signs and the person admitted, but in this case there are none and she says she never has and she’s never given me a reason to not trust her, but I don’t know cause if she’s lying then I don’t have any problem ending the relationship, but I need solid proof.
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