Have we really forgotten how to talk to people? (dating, women, single)

[ellybelly83]

I have been back on OLD for a couple of weeks now, and EVERY single conversation has ended when the guy either wanting to talk about his junk/sex or other fetishes. Out of around 15 matches, 8 didn't pass go, 2 were one sided conversations and the other 5 were only interested in discussing their body parts.

I'm not sure what about my personality says tell me whats between your legs, but i honestly don't care. I know I'm only two weeks in and my sample is small but its enough to make me consider buying a puppy instead.

Everyone i spoke to tells me that this is just how dating is these days, most guys just want to hook up so they jump straight to the sex talk, if the girl doesn't reciprocate they swipe left. Is this really true?

[BirdieBelle]

I think it's a natural side effect of communicating with a screen between the two of you.

[timberline742]

You're just choosing to communicate with lower quality people. Nothing more, nothing less.

[Atlguy39]

Wow, so this is my competition? Shame I don't live in a more desirable city for dating. I'd quickly move to the front of the line if I did.

[Ruth4Truth]

OP, I don't know why you think it's just you. Have you not seen the recent threads by college women, and others, bemoaning the fact that all the first dates sooner or later come down to expectations of sex? That's nothing new.

[Fifty Seven]

This is the flip side of the "what consenting adults do behind closed doors is none of my business" mindset. Once enough people start doing certain things behind closed doors it becomes an expectation. These guys are acting like this because it's worked for them before. You can thank the women/girls who came before you and responded to this approach by sleeping with the guy.

[timberline742]

Originally Posted by Pogue Mahone

This is the flip side of the "what consenting adults do behind closed doors is none of my business" mindset. Once enough people start doing certain things behind closed doors it becomes an expectation. These guys are acting like this because it's worked for them before. You can thank the women/girls who came before you and responded to this approach by sleeping with the guy.

If a woman wants to sleep with a guy, there is nothing wrong with that. From my experience, its the woman that usually takes the lead on this in a first date situation. At least that's been my experience since I turned 40.

[Steve Tamale]

Two weeks and 15 samples? That's quite a low number of guys to make a bold statement like that - most guys I know that have something going for themselves would never post a profile on Match.com or other similar sites.....However - that's not to say there are not good men on dating sites - just saying that 15 is a very small number - take your time and be patient. Question: If you did get a puppy - what kind do you want?

[katharsis]

And people wonder why we old fogeys think the "olden days" were better in a LOT of ways! (Not all ways, of course, but a lot.)

[Auraliea]

You can look at it and generalize.

Or

You can look at it as a screening process. You know ALL guys are not the same. You're just frustrated and lack patience. Those guys are making it easy to weed themselves out. If a relationship is what you want, this is the kind of stuff you have to weed through.