Women 30+ how much of a deal breaker would it be if a guy you met had a vasectomy? (attracted, dance)
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Tabula would have been a deal breaker for me for wanting children at such a late age. I once dated a 40 year old that was still itchin for kids because she didn't have any. Her break up with me was the same reason she had a break up with her previous 45 year old boyfriend.
I knew of a 50 year old that had a 25 year old daughter, and a 6 year old son. (She had her son mid-40s). Dunno what some women's obsession with having kids at such a late age.
Why does it even matter? Their business, their life, their choice. If dudes can father children, without the stigma, "late in life," women can, if they want to and are able.
And y'all need to brush up on current research and data. There are risks associated with being APA. Similar to the risks of being "AMA," and these are increased risks, not absolute risks. Even with elevated risks, most women, even those 35+, go on to have babies with a healthy set of chromosomes. There are more babies with trisomies born to younger mothers because there are more younger mothers having babies. However, their risks are not eliminated for being younger. They're simply lower than the "AMA" demographic.
This is a personal observation only and I'm quite sure that there will be a screaming hoard of women who will disagree eith me, but......
Before I met my present husband I had a rather promiscuous lifestyle and my opinion is that men who have been snipped lose more than just the ability to have kids. While its true that I did not engage in any "before and after" studies on the topic, it was bad enough that I swore I would NEVER have another intimate relationship with a man who had been fixed. Ergo, it would definitely be a deal breaker for me.
Can you elaborate on that while keeping it still PG-13?
Um, just wanna say, I've been with a few guys who had vasectomies, including my ex (for like 10+ years after he had his done) and it doesn't affect function or libido in the slightest.
Antidepressants will have more effect on a guy's sexual ability, as will alcohol, MJ, blood pressure, etc.
This is a personal observation only and I'm quite sure that there will be a screaming hoard of women who will disagree eith me, but......
Before I met my present husband I had a rather promiscuous lifestyle and my opinion is that men who have been snipped lose more than just the ability to have kids. While its true that I did not engage in any "before and after" studies on the topic, it was bad enough that I swore I would NEVER have another intimate relationship with a man who had been fixed. Ergo, it would definitely be a deal breaker for me.
This sounds beyond ridiculous to me. Please provide some medical background information please. I couldn't imagine how from a medical perspective sniping that one tiny small tube can cause such horrors in a woman's sexual experience with a man.
This sounds beyond ridiculous to me. Please provide some medical background information please. I couldn't imagine how from a medical perspective sniping that one tiny small tube can cause such horrors in a woman's sexual experience with a man.
I agree, Chowhound.
Vasectomies can be successfully reversed if a guy changes his mind.
Just a tidbit to keep in mind.
For the record I am 32 and happily married, but not wanting kids had a vasectomy. I know that is quite unusual for a man my age but I am curious, for women that are or around my age if you met an otherwise great guy you liked that had had one would you consider it a deal breaker, full stop?
I had my vasectomy done at 36 but at 22 I had already decided that I did not want anymore children
That's interesting that you waited so long, is there a reason?
I didn't meet my spouse till I was 35 and he was 40.
We got married on my 37th birthday, and I was a couple of weeks pregnant with our oldest by my 38th birthday/our 1st anniversary. We really didn't wait very long at all. We just happened to meet older.
Last edited by TabulaRasa; 09-21-2018 at 09:38 PM..
Tabula would have been a deal breaker for me for wanting children at such a late age. I once dated a 40 year old that was still itchin for kids because she didn't have any. Her break up with me was the same reason she had a break up with her previous 45 year old boyfriend.
I knew of a 50 year old that had a 25 year old daughter, and a 6 year old son. (She had her son mid-40s). Dunno what some women's obsession with having kids at such a late age.
My husband was in the same boat as me.
We were both people who ultimately wanted to be parents and always had, but neither of us had been in relationships with anybody who were really good candidates for coparenting, until we met one another and got serious.
We knew it was not a given that we could even have biological kids, and we discussed early on that if fertility was a closed door, we would foster/adopt versus go the fertility treatment route. Turned out, fertility was absolutely not a concern. Both pregnancies, we conceived within two cycles of trying to conceive. Happily, our path was smooth. Door is still open for fostering.
Would I have stayed with somebody with incompatible thoughts on children? Of course not. Nor would my spouse.
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