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If you grew up in a relatively healthy family, you can remember how everyone contributed to keeping things going.
I remember that and miss it dearly. The people who helped make it happen for me are all gone now, and the idea of rebuilding with a new person, an unknown quantity, is too much of a leap into the dark for me even to consider.
I agree, but there is a reason why men feel that sex is a give get situation. it's because women tend to be more guarded about when sex happens. you don't really have to set the mood with most guys.
Women are less likely to want sex when stressed about other things, for a man stressed about other things the sex makes him LESS stressed about those other things.
The fact that women reject more sex than men get offered is why we feel that women value sex less than we do.
Sex is often used as a "tool" to give or withhold, or manipulate with, to get what one wants out of their spouse.
A weapon to punish, or reward, or both.
Men usually don't care if their wives were mad at them, they still want sex. However, women often will use sex as weapon to get what they want or to reiterate when they're angry.
Sex is often used as a "tool" to give or withhold, or manipulate with, to get what one wants out of their spouse.
A weapon to punish, or reward, or both.
Men usually don't care if their wives were mad at them, they still want sex. However, women often will use sex as weapon to get what they want or to reiterate when they're angry.
Too funny! I said before, that I have absolutely no interest in sex; my libido is nonexistent. Which means my hypothetical wife would have no leverage over me. Any sex would be strictly a goodwill gesture on my part, for her sake. And if she were to withhold sex from me, I'd be glad and relieved not to do it. My response to her would be "Challenge accepted!" Of course, she'd lose the challenge.
OP has made the argument for men who don't want to get married out of fear they will get less sex after they marry, and it may stop altogether. Yes, men expect a regular supply of sex after they get married, and will be unhappy if it diminishes.
Same for women. Women expect a regular supply of sex after they get married, and will be unhappy if it diminishes.
Women know this, and this works both ways. So it's not unheard of for women to try to lock down a "good" man with sex. However, there's sex and there's sex. The former is the passionate, chandelier-swinging sex women have with desirable men; the latter is apathetic, duty-like sex women have with the rest, but like the stability of a relationships with them.
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Oh, and sex? I currently have no libido to speak of, so it's a moot point.
I'm interested in how you learned about these two kinds of sex.
I haven't found passionate sex to be mutually exclusive with relationship stability.
However, there's sex and there's sex. The former is the passionate, chandelier-swinging sex women have with desirable men; the latter is apathetic, duty-like sex women have with the rest, but like the stability of a relationships with them.
So where does the long term couple who desire each other sit?
My husband and I are not the only couple who still swing from the chandelier when we feel like it, after decades of being teammates in life. I also slept with him on the first date, because we both wanted to, and it was fun. Stability and satisfying sex are not mutually exclusive.
Same for women. Women expect a regular supply of sex after they get married, and will be unhappy if it diminishes.
Then why does sex slow down after marriage?
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Like the pun in the thread title! 
