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So you think it's a possibility? He met somebody.else or had a fling or what?? Cause my gut instinct is SCREAMING this and I know it's ridiculous for me to be assuming things. Its probably just my insecurity.why did he blow our conversation off tonight when he was at a restaurant??? Was he alone???
Of course it's a possibility.
He also could be busy, he could be eating, he could be sick, he could be in transit, or he could be glad to be away from your smothering neediness.
I had very mixed feelings about my boyfriend going backpacking (I was very apprehensive about the whole thing as I felt that he was under-prepared and had been very impulsive about booking the trip). Quite honestly, I really didn't want him to go, I was so worried about missing him and I'm also unemployed at the moment so it is not the best time for him to leave me by myself. However, I let my boyfriend go as I wanted him to do something for himself and I would never want to get in the way of him doing something that he really wants to do. It was very difficult to say goodbye on the day that he was leaving, I was in tears for the whole day and also a few times during the days leading up to him leaving for his flight.
I'm really not asking for much. I just want to be reassured and to at least know that he is thinking of me and that he is having a good time. Instead, I feel like I don't exist, I feel like he's completely forgotten about me. Maybe he is having a great time and he is busy doing and seeing lots of things, but still did I never really mean anything to him then??
As he's on holiday... I'm sure that he has plenty of spare time when he could at least send me a message or make some effort to communicate with me (what about downtime in the hostels he's staying at, what about when he's in bed or sitting down at a cafe, bar or restaurant?) I don't want to disrupt his holiday and I'm not even asking him to message me every day or to even get into any detail about what he is doing as I want him to have his freedom and I don't want him to feel like I'm tieing him down or demanding things, however at the very least I would like at least like to know that he still thinks of me... I would be more than pleased if he just sent me a short and simple message every couple of days... it could be a simple "love you" or he could just wish me a nice day. Anything would be better than nothing.
He knows that I've been quite down recently (before he left) and that I can get anxious and worry about things. On top of that I'm unemployed and I've been job hunting for the past two months, I've been having a really rough time. He knows that I didn't want him to go, but I let him because I knew that he deserved to do something for himself and I knew that he would regret it if he didn't go. Why would he do something as drastic as going backpacking alone around Asia and leave me hanging like this? Leave me feeling so insecure and upset.
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Originally Posted by palmtrees099
But he HASNT made any effort to reassure me. If he wanted to do such a big drastic thing like to backpacking alone in Asia for a month... then he needs to reassure me by keeping in touch. He needs to be mature and communicate with me. How can he feel he has the right to do something like this for himself and then not keep in touch with me? Is that okay??? Ihonestly don't feel like I really trust him as he's not keeping in touch and often just ignoring my messages or disappearing from conversations. I want him to have a good time and enjoy the moment of course, I've already mentioned that in my original post, why is he just not making any effort to keep in touch with me? He could take 30 seconds to message me once every 3 days and that would be enough. He could message me from his bed, at a cafe, bar or restaurant, when he's on a bus or public transport, I'm sure he has PLENTY of downtime and it's like he just can't even think of me. Trust me he's probably the one having a good time...hell be Meeting lots of new people, seeing and experiencing new things, travelling from place to place.... I'm the one upset and missing him at home so why couldn't he consider me in even the smallest way?????
You are a total mess. That's why he isn't contacting you. Yes, it is inconsiderate not to check in, BUT, you sound very annoying and if I was him I wouldn't contact you at all. You are too much drama and he probably had to get out. A good guy who is in a healthy relationship would probably check in with you regularly. HOWEVER, you are so dramatic, I don't blame him for minimizing contact. I am surprised he hasn't dumped you yet. I am getting mentally exhausted just by reading your dramatic posts.
You want him to have his freedom but he can't do anything. Sooo....??
You are unemployed so this is not a good time for him to leave? ... Because ...?
You don't want to tie him down but you do tie him down...???
You are a total mess. That's why he isn't contacting you. Yes, it is inconsiderate not to check in, BUT, you sound very annoying and if I was him I wouldn't contact you at all. You are too much drama and he probably had to get out. A good guy who is in a healthy relationship would probably check in with you regularly. HOWEVER, you are so dramatic, I don't blame him for minimizing contact. I am surprised he hasn't dumped you yet. I am getting mentally exhausted just by reading your dramatic posts.
You want him to have his freedom but he can't do anything. Sooo....??
You are unemployed so this is not a good time for him to leave? ... Because ...?
You don't want to tie him down but you do tie him down...???
He can't eat a meal and go out on the town in a foreign country for four hours without you freaking out and keeping track of how long it's been since he contacted you.
No that is not the reason he went...he went for the scenery culture and experience
Whatever hes doing, you have no control over it. So just relax! watch a movie or go out with friends - keep yourself busy while hes away. No need to get all insecure at this point.
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