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Listen domestic violence is complicated and the best way to help is contact authorities who can look into it. If he is a drug dealer they find may another charge to lock him away.
But if you try and act on your good intentions by getting involved, having her come to your place, you are jeopardizing your and her safety.
Often victims of DV deny it and return to their abuser. If you call the cops you will do all you can do and truly show that you are being a good friend.
You can also text her the name of a local DV shelter so she has somewhere in case he attacks her tonight. And remind her there is always the local emergency room.
Listen domestic violence is complicated and the best way to help is contact authorities who can look into it. IF he is a drug dealer they may another charge to lock him away.
But if you try and act on your good intentions you are jeopardizing your and her safety.
Often victims of DV deny it and return to their abuser. If you call the cops you will do all you can do and truly show that you are being a good friend.
I don’t know how I’m risking my safety right now unless I show up to her house like an armed guard lol
But I hear you about calling the cops you’re right
Calling the cops can be dangerous as well if nothing comes of it.
They’res a chance this guy is just saying this with no intentions of doing anything.
Not normal.
And you said you saw bruises.
Stop making excuses. Its a hard thing to do. If he hits her because the cops were call, I guarantee he's already hit her.
Just how you are making all these reasons not to call is exactly what she is doing, except its 10x worse in her case due to the psychological impact of it being someone she was dating.
No, they always want you to call just in case. It sounds like there is a credible threat here.
Your approach to this is so odd. Why did you even start this thread if you're convinced it's no big deal?
Just looking at all angles in a situation like this and wondering if I should get involved at all especially with a potentially dangerous Nutjob like this..
But I know calling the cops is the right thing to do
Please be very careful here, JBT1980. If the guy is as potentially dangerous as your friend has let on he may be, he may well cause you harm if you get in his way. People like him do not think or act like people like you.
Please think very carefully about this before you inject yourself into it to help her. She is refusing to tell her family, yet told you. Why do you think that is?
Honestly, I think your intentions are very honorable, but I do not think you are equipped to handle this problem for or with her. I have known people like the guy she speaks of, and they are extremely dangerous because they have no respect or fear of authority or law enforcement.
I would encourage her to call a domestic violence shelter in her area or the domestic violence hotline. They can talk to her about what guys like that can and will do and talk to her about ways to make herself safe. I think she needs to hear all of that.
Keep yourself safe.
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