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You know, at first I was eyerolling pretty hard about not being able to work or eat and being super depressed over his sick cat (and I say this as the former owner of a cat who lived a long life but had health problems toward the end). It sounded like a ridiculous blow-off. But then, after thinking more about his various texts and odd behavior, I started thinking this guy may suffer from clinical depression. It would explain a lot, including the pulling away and long periods of silence and being "sick." Regardless, it is better to move forward and stop prolonging things. Depressed or just flaky, it's clear that you are not going to have a quality relationship with this person.
It's a lose-lose, if the guy is emotionally unstable...it's a dealbreaker.
She won't. She's hanging on every text, analyzing every moment just begging for an excuse to answer him.
If OP wants to be second place to a cat, then by all means, keep right on texting. She'll be back here posting after the cat has a miracle recovery and he uses her again.
Can I just say” hope you and your cat get better soon” does that work?
I think that’s a good idea, and I wouldn’t plan on answering any future texts you might receive. Like others have said, this guy is not relationship material.
She won't. She's hanging on every text, analyzing every moment just begging for an excuse to answer him.
If OP wants to be second place to a cat, then by all means, keep right on texting. She'll be back here posting after the cat has a miracle recovery and he uses her again.
Don't you hate it when someone uses some kind of sickness as an excuse to flake on you. If it's not the sickness of the person in question, it's their pet. There's just something messed up about that. But, they are just putting bad karma on themselves by doing that.
Crying wolf.
Thank you... it is very lame to use excuses like that. And I like your saying that crying wolf will put on bad karma on themselves.
I think you should reply - telling him you're sorry about his cat, and that you won't bother him, and that he should contact you when he's feeling better.
There's been a lot of strange stuff with this guy, but my gut feeling is that he's sincere.
Thank you redplum for your positivity and support throughout the whole turbulence... I do believe there’s some truth in what he said.. and he does say odd thing sometimes... I just want to wish him the best
He may be sincere, but he also closed with: "I need to focus on me and my cat".
That is, point blank, a way of saying that he does not wish to continue this relationship. This is not ambiguous. Nobody ever ends a message with "I need to focus on XYZ" without it meaning "There is no future to this relationship".
But you already decided he's too flaky to have a relationship with, right? So this should be no problem. Now at least you know for sure. You have closure, and that's great. Wish him the best if you want to, but leave it at that, and move on.
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