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Old 12-18-2018, 10:21 AM
 
10,341 posts, read 5,842,316 times
Reputation: 17884

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Quote:
Originally Posted by MillennialUrbanist View Post
A woman who managed to settle down with a naturally desirable man won't be "not happy", because such a man's company is its own reward, bringing "happiness" by default.
This is what I was responding to, and then gave you an example of why you’re wrong. BUT then you decide to change your opinion to be the opposite of that and go back-and-forth until you can somehow FEEL right.

Where is it that you’re getting these experiences and opinions from? Mine are learned and earned. From being married and then single, and then successfully dating, and having LTRs and STRs, enough experiences to share my opinions and LEARN from those.

... and you?
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Old 12-18-2018, 10:36 AM
 
Location: Florida
23,162 posts, read 26,118,923 times
Reputation: 27898
Low on Luck, in all seriousness, have you considered interviewing for a decent, responsible housemate who would negotiate a fair rent in exchange for specified duties around the place?
You don't really seem to want a genuine loving, shared relationship so why not try for what you do keep telling us you want.....help with the maintenance and a dependable amount of financial assistance.
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Old 12-18-2018, 10:39 AM
 
Location: Rural Wisconsin
19,649 posts, read 9,192,474 times
Reputation: 38048
Quote:
Originally Posted by old_cold View Post
Low on Luck, in all seriousness, have you considered interviewing for a decent, responsible housemate who would negotiate a fair rent in exchange for specified duties around the place?
You don't really seem to want a genuine loving, shared relationship so why not try for what you do keep telling us you want.....help with the maintenance and a dependable amount of financial assistance.
I think that is a GREAT idea. All business, nothing personal, no hurt feelings.
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Old 12-19-2018, 12:28 PM
 
649 posts, read 568,161 times
Reputation: 1847
It's been my experience that men need to feel needed in a relationship in some way whether it's just to maintain the yard, to be a shoulder to cry on or to provide financial security. All men (all people really) need to feel needed by their parner even in some small way.

If everyone you date is telling you the same thing than maybe it's time to start looking at your behavior and figure out why your relationships aren't working. We tend to pick the same partners over and over again without realizing it.

I gotta say I find it strange that you would prioritize your pets over your partner. Of course your pets are important but if I were dating a man and his cat came before me I can't say I would be all that understanding (and I really love cats.)

Maybe you're just not ready to be in a relationship right now and that's ok. It's ok to focus on yourself and your kids.

And there's nothing wrong with not cooking but you have to understand that most men do appreciate a home cooked meal now and again and if you have a serious relationship again compermise can be the key to this minor issue (you cook 2 nights, he cooks 2 nights, go out 1 night, and wing it the other 2 nights.) It's not that complicated. Good luck.
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Old 12-20-2018, 12:42 PM
 
Location: Phoenix, AZ
20,326 posts, read 14,547,380 times
Reputation: 39258
Hmm...

A man who will value and appreciate very highly every scrap of emotional validation or maintenance you give him.
A man who will worship the ground you walk on.
A man who will desire to be trained in your preferences, so that he can do things as you wish to have them done.
A man who won't really mind being put down or treated with a certain degree of contempt, or perhaps...who enjoys being debased, even humiliated?
A man who will give you control of all of his choices and all of his money and resources.

I might know a type who would suit. But you'd need to buy some leather and a flogger or two. Juuuust sayin'.

I almost wish I were kidding.
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Old 12-27-2018, 12:28 PM
 
Location: Minnesota
561 posts, read 322,394 times
Reputation: 1732
Quote:
Originally Posted by old_cold View Post
Low on Luck, in all seriousness, have you considered interviewing for a decent, responsible housemate who would negotiate a fair rent in exchange for specified duties around the place?
You don't really seem to want a genuine loving, shared relationship so why not try for what you do keep telling us you want.....help with the maintenance and a dependable amount of financial assistance.
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Old 12-27-2018, 02:40 PM
 
8,170 posts, read 6,018,431 times
Reputation: 5963
Quote:
Originally Posted by Sonic_Spork View Post
Hmm...

A man who will value and appreciate very highly every scrap of emotional validation or maintenance you give him.
A man who will worship the ground you walk on.
A man who will desire to be trained in your preferences, so that he can do things as you wish to have them done.
A man who won't really mind being put down or treated with a certain degree of contempt, or perhaps...who enjoys being debased, even humiliated?
A man who will give you control of all of his choices and all of his money and resources.

I might know a type who would suit. But you'd need to buy some leather and a flogger or two. Juuuust sayin'.

I almost wish I were kidding.
That sounds like a dream man...
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Old 12-27-2018, 02:43 PM
 
Location: Middle of the valley
48,436 posts, read 34,627,532 times
Reputation: 73585
Quote:
Originally Posted by LowonLuck View Post
That sounds like a dream man...

We know, and we also know that this is your problem. A happy marriage is probably not in your future.
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