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OP, we need more information about these rumored "dates".
I disagree. OP is not asking us to analyze if the 2 “dates” would actually be considered dates. Even if they were real dates, she’s not interested in continuing to “date” him. The question is how to tell him that she’s not interested in dating him.
OP - you’re just going to have to be frank with him “Please stop telling people we’re dating. We are not dating and I’m not interested in a relationship other than friendship.”
It is probably going to sting a little bit but he’ll get over it soon enough. And it will likely change your friendship because he’s been pursuing you and now he’s going to turn his attention elsewhere. That’s just how it is. But you need to tell him sooner rather than later.
OP, we need more information about these rumored "dates".
Quote:
Originally Posted by HokieFan
I disagree. OP is not asking us to analyze if the 2 “dates” would actually be considered dates. Even if they were real dates, she’s not interested in continuing to “date” him. The question is how to tell him that she’s not interested in dating him.
The OP said "I haven’t done anything to lead him on", so it absolutely does matter what went down on those dates.
And knowing the background info will make it easier to offer her solid advice.
It should also be pointed out that she's well aware of what she needs to do. She wants to know how to do it without hurting him or having it affect their friendship. (Frankly, I'm not sure if that's possible.)
Tia, you need to let him know at your earliest convenience. Lotsa nut jobs out there in the real world and he might be one of them possessive types of he's latched onto you so quickly. Speak your mind and voice yourself.
How do you know he tells his parents and everyone you’re “dating”?
If he does this in front of you, correct him, politely: “We’re just friends.”
I didn’t read anywhere that he asked if you two were exclusive, that’s really presumptuous. It might be simple enough to just not go on any more dates with him, until he figures it out —or comes right out and asks you. Then be honest and tell him: “I didn’t consider us to be dating, sorry.”
this guy from my work started talking to me (mostly over text) a couple months ago & we’ve been on 2 “dates” & now he thinks we’re in a committed relationship. I haven’t done anything to lead him on, but I assume I’ve been a bit too nice to the point where he thinks I like him back. I’m fine w/being friends but I do not want a relationship w/him. I know that he tells people (including his parents) that we’re dating & I feel like **** knowing that I don’t have the same feelings for him. I’m not sure how to politely tell him that we’re not dating/committed/etc. w/out hurting him & I really don’t want this to cause problems between us. What should I do?
TIA
What do "dates" mean?
Sounds like a stage 5 clinger, based on what you said after that statement, and it would be wise to clear it up soon. You shouldn't feel badly about not being attracted to him.
men are like dogs.... don't take much to wag our tails or want to hump your leg...
if you agreed to go on two dates.... then its on you....if you go on one date ...out of friendship even pity...that's one thing but going on two..... he's going to want to plan a weekend on a third date.
if you don't want him...then you need to set the record straight....its a dangerous game to act flirty and go on dates then wonder why does he like me??????
this is on you...not him...
Tell him right away. He’s not going to be happy as he thinks he’s in the sex zone, not the friend zone. And even that seems iffy. It sounds as if you don’t really even want to be friends with him so don’t understand how it got this far. In any event once he knows where he stands he’s probably not going to want friendship anyway.
Tell him right away. He’s not going to be happy as he thinks he’s in the sex zone, not the friend zone. And even that seems iffy. It sounds as if you don’t really even want to be friends with him so don’t understand how it got this far. In any event once he knows where he stands he’s probably not going to want friendship anyway.
We don't really know how far "this far" is. Maybe they went to lunch together at work, and he considers that a date, but she doesn't. Maybe he considers the office Christmas party, or a night bowling on the company team, to be date #2. We have no idea.
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