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Lots of people complain about not meeting anyone but aren’t willing for whatever reason to put themselves out there. Nothing ventured, nothing gained.
Location: RI, MA, VT, WI, IL, CA, IN (that one sucked), KY
41,936 posts, read 36,962,945 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by ThisTown123
There is no such thing is "doing OLD right", there's no right or wrong way of doing it. There are too many moving parts and variables to consider. There's no end-all, be-all solution to this, with likely the exception of going out and meeting women in public where you can use your personality, charm, humor, or whatever, to demonstrate your personality..
This isn't an exception. One can use their words to do the exact same thing.
Quote:
Originally Posted by ThisTown123
A computer is too limiting and actually takes the enjoyment and fun out of getting to know someone..
No it doesn't. The computer just facilitates the first meeting. That's it. Then its like every other connection. And getting to know someone a little before the meeting through writing is enjoyable in its own right.
This isn't an exception. One can use their words to do the exact same thing.
You're 100% wrong. It's obvious that type written words aren't enough and conveying your personality in person via inflection, body language, voice tone, humor, etc. are BIG players in determining attraction. They are a big key to this and with online dating, a lot of that is taken away.
I think I may have even shared some time back about a man who was ignored online by a woman, that he bumped to in person at an event, turned on the charm and they became a couple. He mentioned to her that he DID in fact email on the dating site, and she goes, "Wow, had I known what you were like, I would've responded"
Location: RI, MA, VT, WI, IL, CA, IN (that one sucked), KY
41,936 posts, read 36,962,945 times
Reputation: 40635
Quote:
Originally Posted by ThisTown123
You're 100% wrong. It's obvious that type written words aren't enough and conveying your personality in person via inflection, body language, voice tone, humor, etc. are BIG players in deter mining attraction. They are a big key to this and with online dating, a lot of that is taken away..
Hey, just because you're not capable of writing a profile that conveys your personality and humor (if you have them) doesn't mean the rest of us can't. Plenty of people can, they meet and state, 'you're exactly what I expected from your profile'. Do you ever read (anything except stories about OLD sucking)? Written words can have personality, warmth, humor, tone, etc. All the things you listed above can be done via the written word as well, except body language.
The written word with OLD is jut to set up the first meeting. That's it. My partner and I would NEVER have met if it wasn't for OLD, we just wouldn't. LOOOOOAAADS of people can say the same thing; most couples I know would say just that.
Quote:
Originally Posted by ThisTown123
I think I may have even shared some time back about a man who was ignored online by a woman, that he bumped to in person at an event, turned on the charm and they became a couple. He mentioned to her that he DID in fact email on the dating site, and she goes, "Wow, had I known what you were like, I would've responded"
So proof positive right there.
No, just another third person story you heard/read, which in fact, even if true, means absolutely nothing since that interaction could and does go both ways. There are people that may have had a better chance meeting in person, and people that have a better chance meeting online.
Hey, just because you're not capable of writing a profile that conveys your personality and humor (if you have them) doesn't mean the rest of us can't. Plenty of people can, they meet and state, 'you're exactly what I expected from your profile'. Do you ever read (anything except stories about OLD sucking)? Written words can have personality, warmth, humor, tone, etc. All the things you listed above can be done via the written word as well, except body language.
Again you are wrong. I've done a very well crafted up profile and even an initial email that is crafted to whatever they had written in their profile and expounded upon that. So don't call me incapable. I'm far from it. I have gotten a handful of responsive, where they were very impressed with what I've written, but got the, "Sorry, but I don't think we would make a good match" or more bluntly, "I just don't find myself attracted" meaning physically. Some have expressed a height criteria they won't budge on or a full head of hair.
Other woman that had responded and engaged me in actual dialogue, I would found out they were just looking for an ego boost or attention a texting buddy if you will. They'd ghost once I'd mention meeting up.
So there's that to deal with if they DO respond and fake an interest. I'd actually eventually get 2 or 3 women to meet up with me in the course of a year. So those would be my success stories...to even get them to meet.
Quote:
No, just another third person story you heard/read, which in fact, even if true, means absolutely nothing since that interaction could and does go both ways. There are people that may have had a better chance meeting in person, and people that have a better chance meeting online.
True, but online dating there is much less success because of a woman with a filled inbox has many choices and you are but a number.
Location: RI, MA, VT, WI, IL, CA, IN (that one sucked), KY
41,936 posts, read 36,962,945 times
Reputation: 40635
Quote:
Originally Posted by ThisTown123
Again you are wrong. I've done a very well crafted up profile and even an initial email that is crafted to whatever they had written in their profile and expounded upon that. So don't call me incapable. I'm far from it. I have gotten a handful of responsive, where they were very impressed with what I've written, but got the, "Sorry, but I don't think we would make a good match" or more bluntly, "I just don't find myself attracted" meaning physically. Some have expressed a height criteria they won't budge on or a full head of hair.
Ok, well, if your inability to understand what I wrote is an indication of your writing, then no, I'm not wrong and you're proving my point. I never said anything about "well crafted". I'm sure your written English is just fine, but that's not what I'm talking about at all, if you actually read what I wrote or understood it, which you seem incapable of as well.
Quote:
Originally Posted by ThisTown123
Other woman that had responded and engaged me in actual dialogue, I would found out they were just looking for an ego boost or attention a texting buddy if you will. They'd ghost once I'd mention meeting up..
Because you aren't what they are looking for and time and time again you show no respect for other people's boundaries. It's scary how much you disrespect women's feelings and opinions. Thread after thread you indicate this with your statements along the lines of - 'If they met me in person, I'm sure we would have had a date' or 'I read her profile and we were a good match' (rough paraphrasing of sentiments you repeat often). I have zero doubt that your profile and communications are "well crafted" but lack energy and personality.
Quote:
Originally Posted by ThisTown123
So there's that to deal with if they DO respond and fake an interest. I'd actually eventually get 2 or 3 women to meet up with me in the course of a year. So those would be my success stories...to even get them to meet...
LOL.
Quote:
Originally Posted by ThisTown123
True, but online dating there is much less success because of a woman with a filled inbox has many choices and you are but a number.
You may be. I am not.
Quote:
Originally Posted by ThisTown123
Let's just agree to disagree.
No. Can't do that when you're speaking for yourself really and then trying to say it is the same for everyone.
One doesn’t need to “craft anything up”, just as they don’t craft up a personality IRL to meet people.
I just replied to someone who left me a message weeks ago. After I read his profile, I was more interested. When I looked at the rest of his pictures, I wanted to meet him. I started out with: “Sorry I missed your message. You and your dogs are adorable. I have a busy day, can we chat later?”
Had I seen him at a mixer and weeks later remembered and thought I should have tried to meet him, then what? The opportunity is already over.
And— he replied positively, not with some attitude of having been rejected or forgotten. There was nothing unique about his wording or pictures, just unique to me, what I would find attractive.
Location: RI, MA, VT, WI, IL, CA, IN (that one sucked), KY
41,936 posts, read 36,962,945 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by RbccL
Relax. Quit honing your craft.
Exactly. This isn't a craft, it isn't "game", its nothing like that if a person is trying to make genuine connections with individuals (not with women in general).
Exactly. This isn't a craft, it isn't "game", its nothing like that if a person is trying to make genuine connections with individuals (not with women in general).
Why should I "quit honing my craft" when a major reason some women get frustrated with online dating is the the fact they complain constantly about how they only get "Hey" or "Hi" or "Hey sexy" emails (I see the complaints right in their profile) and that's it? If anything I'm probably it makes me stand out better among the uneducated and articulated. In fact, I hear women say, "Please say more than just "hi" or "hey" in your email and show me that you can put together a proper sentence by demonstrating a halfway decent email".
Location: RI, MA, VT, WI, IL, CA, IN (that one sucked), KY
41,936 posts, read 36,962,945 times
Reputation: 40635
Quote:
Originally Posted by ThisTown123
Why should I "quit honing my craft" when a major reason some women get frustrated with online dating is the the fact they complain constantly about how they only get "Hey" or "Hi" or "Hey sexy" emails (I see the complaints right in their profile) and that's it? If anything I'm probably it makes me stand out better among the uneducated and articulated. In fact, I hear women say, "Please say more than just "hi" or "hey" in your email and show me that you can put together a proper sentence by demonstrating a halfway decent email".
And once again you completely miss the point, which I've tried to get across time and time again with a multitude of posts.
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