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When I started seeing this guy someone said to me “you will be posting him a lot on here” well something to that affect.
Well that person you were right.
Here is a another thread about him.
And this time I am dead confuse and upset and kinda **** with myself due to how I handled things.
So basically
So on Saturday evening when I got home from work around 11pm I messaged him , I assumed he was sleeping because he had long day work too. So I just slept, in the morning Sunday when I got up I saw he wasn’t sleep, he actually messaged me back.
Then I send him good morning message, and told him I assumed he was sleeping.
I went about my day, I had evening work on Sunday as well.
He didn’t reach out or reply to me all day but he messaged me when I finished work.
He apologised for not replying sooner and he made what seemed like a joke, “sorry I didn’t reply to your morning worship message”
I was feeling kinda lively, I send him rolling eyes emojis, and said “apology not accepted And “morning worship?!”, well I’m never gonna say that again”
It was kinda a joke I didn’t mean anything by it.
I received nothing on Sunday night.
Monday went and night.
Yesterday afternoon I called him.
He messaged me back instead of calling me back.
He normally calls me back when He misses my call.
He apologised for missing my call and asked how I was.
I replied “never”
He then asked “is everything okay”
“I said everything is fine with me”
I then wrote a long message explaining why I called but I deleted it - so I am not sure if he saw it or not.
Since then nothing.
We normally see each other on Tuesday or Wednesday.
So he didn’t ask to me on Tuesday and normally he would ask to me Wednesday on Tuesday and he hasn’t done that.
What do I do now.
I didn’t want to end things like if they were gonna end.
We were friends first and I would’ve liked to maintain.
But why is he being like this or am I overreacting.
He has been bit distant lately, for example he has been taking longer to reply back to me or reach out to me.
It’s 2 am here UK and I can’t sleep.
I can’t believe this is happening to me.
So after I gave him piece of my mind last night.
And ended things with him
He got back to me this morning with a voice note - he started off by saying - “let me explain myself” well his explanation were full of excuses, exactly what a guy would say says when he is not interested in a woman.
How he is just warned out by work, having stressful life with family, he is having financial issues.
He says he is not upset with me at all, but he just didn’t feel like talking these last few days and needed time out. I have not reply.
He has not said he wanted to stay with me or anything. He said nothing about the status of our relationship.
And that's a good thing. Now, stop looking for one. Take a nice long break and get good with yourself.
And don't start dating again until you are ready to communicate directly, clearly, and honestly rather than through passive-aggressive texts. As you can see, that doesn't work.
Location: RI, MA, VT, WI, IL, CA, IN (that one sucked), KY
41,936 posts, read 36,962,945 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by CapsChick
And don't start dating again until you are ready to communicate directly, clearly, and honestly rather than through passive-aggressive texts. As you can see, that doesn't work.
If he wants to end things, why can’t he just say so.
The same reason why you couldn't just say what was bothering you when he asked. Y'all are terrible at communicating.
I don't understand this hesitancy to share what you're feeling or thinking with the person you're dating. You can bump uglies but you can't say "My comment was intended as a joke but maybe you thought I was serious" or "I was confused when you said/did x"?
Expecting someone to "just know" how you're feeling or thinking is setting them up for failure, and setting yourself up for more hurt feelings. Just tell them.
I don't recall your previous posts about this relationship but I'm wondering why you come across as so on edge, you seem to be waiting for him to show you that he isn't perfect and once he did you started this game playing.
You don't have to tough all the time. If you're upset that he didn't message then message him and say "heya, you didn't message this morning, i always look forward to hearing from you." You need to soften up a little, let him in on the inner workings of your mind. You wont come across as needy if you are a bit more open with the fact that you want to hear from him.
If this relationship is over, its lessons that can be carried into future relationships.
Expecting someone to "just know" how you're feeling or thinking is setting them up for failure, and setting yourself up for more hurt feelings.
Exactly.
Hoping that hints and saying the opposite of how you really feel, just so you can see if he can figure it out is high school girl games. Its not romantic, nor is it mysterious. If that type of thing excites you, you are in for a lifetime of disappointment. And you set yourself up for it with this guy, and the predictable result happened.
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