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Either you're a person who respects social boundaries or you aren't.
If you go after this woman just because you think she's flirting with you, then you aren't even a friend because a friend wouldn't do that. A friend would respect her relationship and her BF.
There is a LOT to think about here, and yes, the co-worker thing is a big deal too.
But it's not the most important factor for you to consider.
It is a deterrent. But she isn't married. Relationships are important. But people are in relationships to see who they want to be with.
Flip the roles...if you were in the committed relationship and the person moving in on your partner had this same mindset, would you be cool with that?
I'm a bisexual man. Most people "on the street" would not be able to tell that about me, as I'm not stereotypically gay or anything.
With that said, my "gaydar" can often pick up a gay man instantly. I went to a drive through of a place I don't normally frequent last week. The young man handing me the food set my gaydar off instantly. If I had gone inside, I would have tried talking to me. I just smiled and went on.
My way of thinking for same sex relationships when person isn't "out" or even acknowledging their homosexual desires is similar to water finding an outlet.
A possible threeway relationship? I'm sure her boyfriend wouldn't mind his woman getting down with another woman. You should totally go for it. It could benefit all three of you.
I'm a bisexual man. Most people "on the street" would not be able to tell that about me, as I'm not stereotypically gay or anything.
With that said, my "gaydar" can often pick up a gay man instantly. I went to a drive through of a place I don't normally frequent last week. The young man handing me the food set my gaydar off instantly. If I had gone inside, I would have tried talking to me. I just smiled and went on.
My way of thinking for same sex relationships when person isn't "out" or even acknowledging their homosexual desires is similar to water finding an outlet.
There seems to be an epidemic of food servers and random workers secretly adoring CD posters.
So what? She sounds like a trouble maker and a philanderer who could be two-timing her boyfriend all the time for all you know, and you're getting suckered too. You aren't being smart and mature or thinking ahead of the heart-breaking consequences of getting involved with a philanderer, whether you work with them or not.
The fact remains that if you get involved in an intimate personal relationship with a co-worker (of any gender and sexual preferences, it makes no difference what they are and nobody cares anyway) that is a conflict of interest that will get you fired really fast.
Or if you misinterpret the co-worker's cues and intentions, say the wrong thing, make the wrong move in front of witnesses and then you get accused of interference or harassment on the job - you'll soon be getting fired and looking for another job. Like lickety-split. Your co-worker won't lose her job, you will.
Your interference and conflict of interest with a co-worker and getting fired for it won't look good for your future job prospects. You'll get pegged as a trouble maker yourself and you wouldn't get a referral from any employer that fires you for that kind of thing. Do you want that on your employment record?
Hmmmm... You look like a bad decision.. come on over here.
I haven't even hooked up with someone in 5 years.
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Update your resume.
