Girlfriend went on lunch date with guy - is this wrong? (woman, single)
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Ive been living with my current gf for 8 years. Our relationship is kinda stale and I work long hours... 8am-10pm six days a week. I dont make much money but I oay the rent and bills. She currently does not work due to getting laid off last month.
Thru a mutual friend, she met a man our age (late 30s) and they have been texting. She told me she was going to have lunch with him at a local spot and discuss a job position. They met for lunch and here is how it went down (just take this as true)... they sat down, and chatted for 2 hours before even ordering food. Then after the food came, they chatted for another 3 hours. They really hit it off, and never discussed a job. Since then they have been texting and she told me she is going to lunch again with him. He is not anything attractice but he makes mid six figures, has a beautiful house, etc. And he is single.
Im not too happy about this situation and just had some questions/looking for advise.
1. If you were in my situation and your sig other went to lunch with a person of the opposit sex who she just met, and it turned into 5 hours of chatting at the table, would you be pissed?
2. Was what she did disrespectful to the relationship?
3. How should I go about approaching her about this?
She was up front with you about the lunch and how it came out. She was also apparently truthful about meeting up again, texting, and how much they have in common. Sounds like she respects your relationship enough to do so. You admit your relationship is "stale", you don't seem to have time for it, and doesn't sound as if you care all that much. What are you trying to be outraged about, her honesty? Seems like past time to show/tell her you want to keep something alive. She may or may not want the same. Don't rest on your modest laurels about just paying the bills. Its not the money, the house, or physical attractiveness. Your competition is the personal connection and attention. Something you may no longer offer. I wouldn't wait too long.
Last edited by Parnassia; 05-26-2019 at 03:27 AM..
How would I feel? Disrespected, of course. But I believe my GF would avoid any appearance of improprieties.
5 hours to “discuss”’a job “position” without mentioning anything about it, followed by texting to set up another meal date to discuss a job that was never mentioned the on the first 5 hour meeting? Lmao get real! I know what position she wants to be in Lol.
Hypergamy! Salute!!
Last edited by hawaiiancoconut; 05-26-2019 at 03:42 AM..
Come on, dude, lighten up. I am meeting a guy next week (who btw has a fiance) for the exact same reason. Except I do plan to discuss the job. You do realize that career networking is a thing, right? It can be much similar to regular socializing. You have to feel things out and be natural, not just some cold robotic opportunist. Being a "good fit" is huge.
Ive been living with my current gf for 8 years. Our relationship is kinda stale and I work long hours... 8am-10pm six days a week. I dont make much money but I oay the rent and bills. She currently does not work due to getting laid off last month.
Thru a mutual friend, she met a man our age (late 30s) and they have been texting. She told me she was going to have lunch with him at a local spot and discuss a job position. They met for lunch and here is how it went down (just take this as true)... they sat down, and chatted for 2 hours before even ordering food. Then after the food came, they chatted for another 3 hours. They really hit it off, and never discussed a job. Since then they have been texting and she told me she is going to lunch again with him. He is not anything attractice but he makes mid six figures, has a beautiful house, etc. And he is single.
Im not too happy about this situation and just had some questions/looking for advise.
1. If you were in my situation and your sig other went to lunch with a person of the opposit sex who she just met, and it turned into 5 hours of chatting at the table, would you be pissed?
2. Was what she did disrespectful to the relationship?
3. How should I go about approaching her about this?
3 years ago, you mentioned "Me and her father are going to sit her down for a serious talk."
Now you have an 8 year girlfriend who's meeting a man.
And your name implies your're female.
Are you afraid your girlfriend is switching to men?
Do your husband and 3 kids know about this 8-year relationship with a woman? How do they feel about it? I would think their opinion is more valuable than a bunch of Internet strangers.
Spend more time paying attention to your relationship.
As mentioned above, she was honest with you.
Honesty is great...she may be telling the OP very honestly that they went back to his place next! ...so much for honesty.
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