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Old 07-08-2019, 09:31 AM
 
2 posts, read 229 times
Reputation: 10

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Here are a couple of clues
- one incident it was my birthday and she was very curious on my age and I was joking around not telling her which made her very interested. She really wanted to know and kept pressing and I told her. She said I look very good for my age and she said i look like im mixed with something. I am asian and she thought i was half white. I jokingly said i was black in a sarcastic way which she laughed.
- i went hiking one time and posted on my social media. she looked asked where it was at. I said next time i go ill invite ya. we talked about it again the next day and she says yeah we should go sometime, but I can't tell if it is 1 on 1 only or she wants to invite her friend since her friend was in the car when we talked about it

- i was at home and she was the first to text me to come over to campus for an event when i had other friends there who could have texted me first
- in a table with a bunch of people eating and she offered me some of her food cause she was feeling full when there were other guys around
- we talked about traveling and she said she wanted to go to california which is where I am from. It was just me and her talking about it then she included her friend who wanted to come as well which sucked. (i figured a girl will only ask to hang out if she has interest in you)

not so good
- i was leader for the day and i assigned her a role she didn't like she said thanks buddy in a sarcastic way from my experience when a girl calls you buddy it means she sees you as a friend
- Usually girls I can tell are interested things would just be effortless convo goes smoothly and all that. My convo with her not as much
- sometimes we sit across from each other and i can't catch her looking at me usually if someone likes you they will look at you


You can say just ask her out well if I do that and get burned it would suck cause class is very small and everyone will know about it and it would be really awkward cause I will have to work with her. I am in one of her groups so it would just be awkward for both of us. What do you guys think based on clues I gave.

Last edited by shyguy1994; 07-08-2019 at 09:43 AM..
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Old 07-08-2019, 09:36 AM
 
Location: Brentwood, Tennessee
43,600 posts, read 42,195,359 times
Reputation: 84010
Quote:
Originally Posted by shyguy1994 View Post
Here are a couple of clues
- one incident it was my birthday and she was very curious on my age and I was joking around not telling her which made her very interested. She really wanted to know and kept pressing and I told her. She said I look very good for my age and she said i look like im mixed with something. I am asian and she thought i was half white. I jokingly said i was black in a sarcastic way which she laughed.
- i went hiking one time and posted on my social media. she looked asked where it was at. I said next time i go ill invite ya. we talked about it again the next day and she says yeah we should go sometime, but I can't tell if it is 1 on 1 only or she wants to invite her friend

- i was at home and she was the first to text me to come over to campus for an event when i had other friends there who could have texted me first
- in a table with a bunch of people eating and she offered me some of her food cause she was feeling full when there were other guys around
- we talked about traveling and she said she wanted to go to california which is where I am from. It was just me and her talking about it then she included her friend who wanted to come as well which sucked.

not so good
- i was leader for the day and i assigned her a role she didn't like she said thanks buddy in a sarcastic way
- Usually girls I can tell are interested things would just be effortless convo goes smoothly and all that
- sometimes we sit across from each other and i can't catch her looking at me usually if someone likes you they will look at you


You can say just ask her out well if I do that and get burned it would suck cause class is very small and everyone will know about it and it would be really awkward cause I will have to work with her. I am in one of her groups so it would just be awkward for both of us. What do you guys think based on clues I gave.
Then I guess you'll never know.

Based on what you wrote, she's just flirting and might be mildly interested. But if you can't tolerate ANY risk at all, you won't have many fulfilling relationships.
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Old 07-08-2019, 09:48 AM
 
2 posts, read 229 times
Reputation: 10
Quote:
Originally Posted by BirdieBelle View Post
Then I guess you'll never know.

Based on what you wrote, she's just flirting and might be mildly interested. But if you can't tolerate ANY risk at all, you won't have many fulfilling relationships.
i would ask her but i think the consequences are a bit much atm. a lot of girls gossip in my program and if i fail then everyone will know about it. I just wanna know if she is interested or not
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Old 07-08-2019, 10:17 AM
 
Location: Brentwood, Tennessee
43,600 posts, read 42,195,359 times
Reputation: 84010
Quote:
Originally Posted by shyguy1994 View Post
i would ask her but i think the consequences are a bit much atm. a lot of girls gossip in my program and if i fail then everyone will know about it. I just wanna know if she is interested or not
It's really hard to know. But I wouldn't mess with asking her out if your classmates aren't really dating etc.

I get that it would seem awkward, but you have to have the confidence to not care about that. I'm not saying you have to go for it, but at least recognize that it's only awkward if you make it that way. You can't care if they talk about you.

You have to have some self-confidence that there's nothing wrong with asking out someone who seems to be interested. If they're too immature to deal, that's on them.

It's just a difficult time overall. Hang in there
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Old Today, 08:29 AM
 
Location: (six-cent-dix-sept)
4,618 posts, read 2,354,239 times
Reputation: 2856
when i was in college something similar. we had a small study group of like 6 or 8 of us would hang and share homework. i was chummy with some girl. i asked her out when we were alone. she wasnt with it. it was awkward with the group for a day. we all stayed friends til graduation.
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Old Today, 08:39 AM
 
12,529 posts, read 9,988,871 times
Reputation: 16204
Quote:
Originally Posted by shyguy1994 View Post
i would ask her but i think the consequences are a bit much atm. a lot of girls gossip in my program and if i fail then everyone will know about it. I just wanna know if she is interested or not
Asking someone out and having them say yes is not an accomplishment. It is conversation.
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Old Today, 10:10 AM
 
Location: (six-cent-dix-sept)
4,618 posts, read 2,354,239 times
Reputation: 2856
Quote:
Originally Posted by stanley-88888888 View Post
when i was in college something similar. we had a small study group of like 6 or 8 of us would hang and share homework. i was chummy with some girl. i asked her out when we were alone. she wasnt with it. it was awkward with the group for a day. we all stayed friends til graduation.
Quote:
Originally Posted by BirdieBelle View Post
It's really hard to know. But I wouldn't mess with asking her out if your classmates aren't really dating etc.

I get that it would seem awkward, but you have to have the confidence to not care about that. I'm not saying you have to go for it, but at least recognize that it's only awkward if you make it that way. You can't care if they talk about you.

You have to have some self-confidence that there's nothing wrong with asking out someone who seems to be interested. If they're too immature to deal, that's on them.

It's just a difficult time overall. Hang in there
when i asked for her number, she asked why would you want it for !. and i said something like so we can hang out and stuff. she gave me a weird look and she was silent the rest of the ride home. the next day, the other girls asked if i liked her; so, awkward. but we laughed my way out of it.
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Old Today, 12:15 PM
 
Location: Austin
943 posts, read 421,920 times
Reputation: 1177
Is this thread for real? She obviously likes you based on what you've written. She's probably wondering why you aren't getting it
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Old Today, 12:26 PM
 
100 posts, read 30,139 times
Reputation: 164
Quote:
Originally Posted by stanley-88888888 View Post
when i asked for her number, she asked why would you want it for !. and i said something like so we can hang out and stuff. she gave me a weird look and she was silent the rest of the ride home. the next day, the other girls asked if i liked her; so, awkward. but we laughed my way out of it.
She obviously told her friends she thinks you like her. What did you answer?

So she knows you like her! Ask her out now. She could say no. If she does, you do not need to feel weird, as long as you don't keep stalking her.

Believe it or not, that how people do dating. Sometimes, they get a yes, sometimes, its a no. If it's a no, and she is NOT mature about it, she is a jackass.

She might say yes and you might have a great time.
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Old Today, 12:49 PM
 
6,793 posts, read 2,447,917 times
Reputation: 15592
Quote:
Originally Posted by shyguy1994 View Post
i would ask her but i think the consequences are a bit much atm. a lot of girls gossip in my program and if i fail then everyone will know about it. I just wanna know if she is interested or not

You can play this slow. Next time you two talk, say something like "Let's go grab a cup of coffee and hang out a little bit." That's pretty non-committal. If she's feeling it, she'll say yes, or if she can't for some reason, she'll suggest another time to get together.


IF you two DO hang out for a cup of coffee or whatever, and she's really chatty and flirty, assume she's into you, and say something like "Hey, you know what would be fun to do? We should go do blah blah blah." Still fairly non-committal.


The way you describe her, she seems pretty nice and friendly. Why would you assume she'd gossip and talk negatively about you later? She doesn't seem the type.
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