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Old Yesterday, 11:38 AM
 
12,344 posts, read 13,582,660 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by AgGuy View Post
After we talked about that she was still really flirty and was teasing me about how I am old school on asking her on a date face to face and we continue to talk off and on. I was out of the office one day here last week and she left me some notes on my desk as well. We just finished up harvest so she is done for the summer and will be heading back to her teaching job here soon.
She’s right. You are way behind the times.

I saw a drunk older guy hand a gal a piece of paper. He said his phone number is on it. I about laughed out loud. Who does that?

I saw two kids in their twenties and one wanted the others Snap Chat. She laid her cell phone on his for a second and there you go.

You don’t ask people on a date. You ask if they wanna hang out sometime.

At any rate she enjoyed your company but nothing more. Move on.
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Old Yesterday, 12:29 PM
 
Location: State of Transition
78,771 posts, read 70,607,687 times
Reputation: 76746
Quote:
Originally Posted by AgGuy View Post
After we talked about that she was still really flirty and was teasing me about how I am old school on asking her on a date face to face and we continue to talk off and on. I was out of the office one day here last week and she left me some notes on my desk as well. We just finished up harvest so she is done for the summer and will be heading back to her teaching job here soon.
Watch your FB page, or whatever social media presence you have. You never know; she might message you after she gets back to her regular life.

That's me, ever the optimist!
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Old Yesterday, 01:22 PM
 
695 posts, read 179,043 times
Reputation: 910
Quote:
Originally Posted by Ruth4Truth View Post
Watch your FB page, or whatever social media presence you have. You never know; she might message you after she gets back to her regular life.

That's me, ever the optimist!
Hell no. She said no, she gave “It’s not you, it’s me” excuses, she’s leaving soon. Friendzoned orbiters are optimists who stalk the open avenues of communication for any sign that the woman is interested. Better to be a realist: anything less than an enthusiastic “Yes!” means no. I’ve been rejected just about every way you can be rejected...I’ve been ghosted, told “No thanks,” been stood up, ignored, blocked, told that she’s too busy to get together (multiple times over the course of more than a month), told that she wasn’t interested in the event I was inviting her to, been told that she wasn’t looking to date then (translation: “I’m holding out for someone better than you,” who came along a few weeks after I asked her). I’ve gotten “Let’s just be friends” and “You’re like a brother to me.” In the end the only thing that they all really meant was “No, not you.”

There should be no holding out hope for an eventual “Yes” in dating if the initial answer was something different. There are only two possible answers in dating...a decisive “Yes” that results in successfully meeting her for a date, and everything else. “Everything else” is a “No”. And if the answer is “No,” forget her and move on. To do anything else is to set yourself up in the no-man’s-land of the friendzone, hoping that she’ll “come around.”
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Old Yesterday, 02:01 PM
 
1,200 posts, read 356,010 times
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She knows you like her. If she decides she is interested, she'll get back to you on it. Meanwhile, don't wait around. Ask out other young women.
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Old Yesterday, 02:17 PM
 
325 posts, read 84,824 times
Reputation: 665
Quote:
Originally Posted by AgGuy View Post
After we talked about that she was still really flirty and was teasing me about how I am old school on asking her on a date face to face and we continue to talk off and on. I was out of the office one day here last week and she left me some notes on my desk as well. We just finished up harvest so she is done for the summer and will be heading back to her teaching job here soon.

This flirty behavior is after she turned down your date, and now she is playing cat/mouse. She is the cat, you are the mouse she is toying with. It's great fun for her. You have permission to flirt back- whatever a woman does to you, you can do back to her. So start having fun teasing her back, but not any stronger then she teased you.

For example, if she said "asking for a date in person, how old school!"

I'd tease her back, "yea, it's how your dad and mom got together, and everyone else in the past 1 million years of human history"

Or I might tease back and say "how sad, you've never been asked on a real date? how sad"

What was in the notes, something personal, or about work?

Last edited by james112; Yesterday at 02:35 PM..
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Old Yesterday, 03:41 PM
 
Location: State of Transition
78,771 posts, read 70,607,687 times
Reputation: 76746
Quote:
Originally Posted by At Arms Length View Post
Hell no. She said no, she gave “It’s not you, it’s me” excuses, she’s leaving soon. Friendzoned orbiters are optimists who stalk the open avenues of communication for any sign that the woman is interested. Better to be a realist: anything less than an enthusiastic “Yes!” means no. I’ve been rejected just about every way you can be rejected...I’ve been ghosted, told “No thanks,” been stood up, ignored, blocked, told that she’s too busy to get together (multiple times over the course of more than a month), told that she wasn’t interested in the event I was inviting her to, been told that she wasn’t looking to date then (translation: “I’m holding out for someone better than you,” who came along a few weeks after I asked her). I’ve gotten “Let’s just be friends” and “You’re like a brother to me.” In the end the only thing that they all really meant was “No, not you.”

There should be no holding out hope for an eventual “Yes” in dating if the initial answer was something different. There are only two possible answers in dating...a decisive “Yes” that results in successfully meeting her for a date, and everything else. “Everything else” is a “No”. And if the answer is “No,” forget her and move on. To do anything else is to set yourself up in the no-man’s-land of the friendzone, hoping that she’ll “come around.”
How can I argue with this? Especially combined with BirdieBelle's take on it?

Still, I like E-Twist's answer best:

Quote:
She knows you like her. If she decides she is interested, she'll get back to you on it. Meanwhile, don't wait around. Ask out other young women.
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Old Today, 01:07 PM
 
Location: (six-cent-dix-sept)
4,551 posts, read 2,324,089 times
Reputation: 2813
Quote:
Originally Posted by AgGuy View Post
After we talked about that she was still really flirty and was teasing me about how I am old school on asking her on a date face to face and we continue to talk off and on. I was out of the office one day here last week and she left me some notes on my desk as well. We just finished up harvest so she is done for the summer and will be heading back to her teaching job here soon.
Quote:
Originally Posted by BirdieBelle View Post
Sounds like that’s that.
Quote:
Originally Posted by AgGuy View Post
What do you mean by that?
Quote:
Originally Posted by BirdieBelle View Post
She declined your invitation to go out, and she's heading back to her other job. So sounds like it's all over anyway.
for some reason, this reminds of henry and delilah in firewatch.
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