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Old Yesterday, 08:41 AM
 
3 posts, read 448 times
Reputation: 10

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So here is the situation. I work at a coop and for harvest we have part time help that comes in and runs the scales. Well long story short they hired a girl and we hit it off from hour one of meeting her. After getting to know her for a week I find out sheís a lesbian but really isnít a lesbian ( got into a situation with another girl and got too deep and the rest is history) she broke up with her girlfriend as soon as she started at the coop. Well after a couple of weeks of working with her and talking one night I decided to ask her on a date after she was teasing me why I like her. She said Iím not in the right head place to go on a date and itís not fair to you if I did. Give me some time to figure things out. She said eventually she is wanting to get back into a heterosexual relationship. I need help what do I do or what does this mean?
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Old Yesterday, 08:45 AM
 
Location: State of Transition
78,771 posts, read 70,607,687 times
Reputation: 76746
It means she needs time to process the breakup and the relationship, before she moves on to another potential relationship. This is common for anyone; heterosexual or not. In the meantime, continue enjoying her company at work. She seems to like you, because she was teasing you about liking her. This is a good sign. Just be patient.
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Old Yesterday, 08:51 AM
 
Location: Brentwood, Tennessee
43,308 posts, read 41,880,675 times
Reputation: 83205
Quote:
Originally Posted by AgGuy View Post
So here is the situation. I work at a coop and for harvest we have part time help that comes in and runs the scales. Well long story short they hired a girl and we hit it off from hour one of meeting her. After getting to know her for a week I find out sheís a lesbian but really isnít a lesbian ( got into a situation with another girl and got too deep and the rest is history) she broke up with her girlfriend as soon as she started at the coop. Well after a couple of weeks of working with her and talking one night I decided to ask her on a date after she was teasing me why I like her. She said Iím not in the right head place to go on a date and itís not fair to you if I did. Give me some time to figure things out. She said eventually she is wanting to get back into a heterosexual relationship. I need help what do I do or what does this mean?
It means no thanks, forget about it. She just said it in about 5 different indirect ways in order to soften the blow.

People can be very flirty at work. It doesn't always mean they're into you.
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Old Yesterday, 09:11 AM
 
Location: State of Transition
78,771 posts, read 70,607,687 times
Reputation: 76746
Quote:
Originally Posted by BirdieBelle View Post
It means no thanks, forget about it. She just said it in about 5 different indirect ways in order to soften the blow.

People can be very flirty at work. It doesn't always mean they're into you.
Wow. We have night-and-day takes on this situation. Could I be that far off?

IDK, OP, but either way, she's going to be there at your workplace regularly, so you'll find out eventually, if she's interested in you that way, or not. It's frustrating when you really hit it off with someone, but they don't reciprocate your feelings. Like, how often does it happen, that anyone really hits it off with someone?

Let us know if her demeanor changes toward you, after you two had that talk.
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Old Yesterday, 09:24 AM
 
Location: Florida
19,817 posts, read 19,910,927 times
Reputation: 23221
She still likes girls better for now
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Old Yesterday, 09:31 AM
 
Location: Brentwood, Tennessee
43,308 posts, read 41,880,675 times
Reputation: 83205
Quote:
Originally Posted by Ruth4Truth View Post
Wow. We have night-and-day takes on this situation. Could I be that far off?
Naaah, but either way sheís not a good partner for the OP because she doesnít know what she wants, and that can only mean torture for him.

To me, though, she was pretty clear that she was declining while still trying to maintain an amicable relationship for work.
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Old Yesterday, 09:47 AM
 
3 posts, read 448 times
Reputation: 10
After we talked about that she was still really flirty and was teasing me about how I am old school on asking her on a date face to face and we continue to talk off and on. I was out of the office one day here last week and she left me some notes on my desk as well. We just finished up harvest so she is done for the summer and will be heading back to her teaching job here soon.
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Old Yesterday, 09:54 AM
 
Location: Brentwood, Tennessee
43,308 posts, read 41,880,675 times
Reputation: 83205
Sounds like that’s that.
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Old Yesterday, 10:01 AM
 
3 posts, read 448 times
Reputation: 10
What do you mean by that?
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Old Yesterday, 10:12 AM
 
Location: Brentwood, Tennessee
43,308 posts, read 41,880,675 times
Reputation: 83205
Quote:
Originally Posted by AgGuy View Post
What do you mean by that?
She declined your invitation to go out, and she's heading back to her other job. So sounds like it's all over anyway.
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