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Old Today, 01:15 PM
 
8 posts
Reputation: 10

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I have been having a casual relationship with a woman for a while, mainly for the sex, since I don't really have the time for any other relationship activities. We might go out to dinner, to the movies, etc, on occasion.

Well, long sory short, she's pregnant and I was pretty furious when she told me. I have a bit of a hot temper and can be pretty crass when I'm in that state. She started crying and I got even more mad.

We've spoken again since then, I apologised but told her that she's surely aware that no good can come from that baby being born. My main focus is my career and nothing is getting in the way of that. I offered to pay for the abortion but she says it's easy for me to talk. That having an abortion is not like going for a coffee.

I mean, I understand that, but she must be able to understand my point of view as well, no? What can I do so that she gets that the an abortion is the only sensible choice?

P.S. I'm 34 and she's 27, if that matters.

 
Old Today, 01:21 PM
 
Location: In a place beyond human comprehension
7,638 posts, read 4,880,105 times
Reputation: 12538
Did you wear a condom?
 
Old Today, 01:21 PM
 
Location: Scottsdale, AZ
14,792 posts, read 12,249,791 times
Reputation: 26223
Her body her choice.
 
Old Today, 01:27 PM
 
690 posts, read 178,087 times
Reputation: 908
It’s all about you and what you want, huh.

If having a child is that big of a risk to your future then you shouldn’t have been having sex, much less unprotected sex. If you can’t take the chance, keep it in your pants.
 
Old Today, 01:33 PM
 
Location: Coastal Georgia
37,130 posts, read 45,641,400 times
Reputation: 61779
Time to grow up. Its called consequences of your actions. It’s her decision, and it’s great you are focused on the career, what with the child support and all.
 
Old Today, 01:36 PM
 
Location: Middle of the ocean
31,673 posts, read 19,975,978 times
Reputation: 45740
You have no say in the decision. Being an azhat is certainly not going to change her mind
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Old Today, 01:37 PM
 
57 posts, read 6,577 times
Reputation: 88
If you are having sex with someone of reproductive age, you must be prepared for the possibility of pregnancy (even if you take precautions, which can fail.) Just the way it is. As someone else mentioned, it's her body and her choice.

I wouldn't want to get an abortion either if I got accidentally pregnant (even though I'm not keen to have children.) I couldn't deal with the emotional consequences of doing it.
 
Old Today, 01:40 PM
 
Location: Pittsburgh
22,564 posts, read 24,148,016 times
Reputation: 48981
Was this a birth control failure? If you're that adamant about not having kids, maybe you should "just" have a vasectomy.
 
Old Today, 01:43 PM
 
5,169 posts, read 2,760,869 times
Reputation: 9475
Quote:
Originally Posted by JoshamTR View Post
I have been having a casual relationship with a woman for a while, mainly for the sex, since I don't really have the time for any other relationship activities. We might go out to dinner, to the movies, etc, on occasion.

Well, long sory short, she's pregnant and I was pretty furious when she told me. I have a bit of a hot temper and can be pretty crass when I'm in that state. She started crying and I got even more mad.

We've spoken again since then, I apologised but told her that she's surely aware that no good can come from that baby being born. My main focus is my career and nothing is getting in the way of that. I offered to pay for the abortion but she says it's easy for me to talk. That having an abortion is not like going for a coffee.

I mean, I understand that, but she must be able to understand my point of view as well, no? What can I do so that she gets that the an abortion is the only sensible choice?

P.S. I'm 34 and she's 27, if that matters.

Maybe next time pull out!


Also the choice is not yours it is hers and her body.
 
Old Today, 01:45 PM
Status: "Disagreeing is not the same thing as trolling." (set 12 days ago)
 
Location: Texas
9,548 posts, read 3,660,304 times
Reputation: 19582
You should have used a condom.

You cannot force someone to have an abortion.
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