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Old Today, 01:03 AM
 
111 posts, read 35,397 times
Reputation: 124

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So I recently got back together with an ex. We had been on an off before and got back together. I did go no contact for over a year because I wanted to forget him. But he got back in contact with me and we started hanging out again. The only thing is that he has only hung out at my place(no sex) a few times and watched movies. Maybe a handful of times. We haven't gone on any dates and he rarely even contacts me between time we hang out. He has asked me to contact him any time, but yet he doesn't. He was the one that came to me and yet won't even make time to see me when I ask. He is always busy. We haven't had sex yet, but he has brought it up. How can I get the man to see this is not how I want to be treated!
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Old Today, 01:29 AM
 
Location: Scottsdale, AZ
14,808 posts, read 12,262,507 times
Reputation: 26252
He’s only there for sex.
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Old Today, 03:21 AM
 
4,798 posts, read 1,445,323 times
Reputation: 6592
Quote:
Originally Posted by hawaiiancoconut View Post
Hes only there for sex.
They're not having sex.

She didn't contact him for over a year.

OP, I'd guess he's being cautious at this point. He probably isn't busy. I'd say he doesn't really trust you right now, and he wants to see if you're going to disappear on him again. And even though he wants to be back together with you, I'd bet he is angry with you for not talking to him for over a year. It's difficult to jump right back in as if nothing happened.

Quote:
Originally Posted by JaneMeyer View Post
How can I get the man to see this is not how I want to be treated!
You treated him poorly. Have you apologized?
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Old Today, 03:55 AM
 
Location: Fuquay Varina
4,575 posts, read 6,654,180 times
Reputation: 11350
There is a reason people are exes. They should stay that way.
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Old Today, 06:16 AM
 
3,788 posts, read 3,004,141 times
Reputation: 7563
Quote:
Originally Posted by JaneMeyer View Post
How can I get the man to see this is not how I want to be treated!
Stop allowing it. You're free to not participate.
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Old Today, 06:24 AM
 
Location: a primitive state
9,884 posts, read 20,175,831 times
Reputation: 12422
If he’s not putting out, you need to find someone who will.
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Old Today, 06:28 AM
 
111 posts, read 35,397 times
Reputation: 124
Quote:
Originally Posted by redplum33 View Post
They're not having sex.

She didn't contact him for over a year.

OP, I'd guess he's being cautious at this point. He probably isn't busy. I'd say he doesn't really trust you right now, and he wants to see if you're going to disappear on him again. And even though he wants to be back together with you, I'd bet he is angry with you for not talking to him for over a year. It's difficult to jump right back in as if nothing happened.


You treated him poorly. Have you apologized?
Actually he disappeared on me. I didn't. I tried to stay in contact with him but he was breadcrumbing me. So I just stayed away and did not contact.
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Old Today, 06:29 AM
 
Location: USA
17,827 posts, read 8,894,085 times
Reputation: 13356
Quote:
Originally Posted by JaneMeyer View Post
Actually he disappeared on me. I didn't. I tried to stay in contact with him but he was breadcrumbing me. So I just stayed away and did not contact.
He's doing it again. Don't participate. Find someone that respects you and your time.
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Old Today, 06:40 AM
 
Location: Brentwood, Tennessee
43,366 posts, read 41,900,880 times
Reputation: 83321
Quote:
Originally Posted by JaneMeyer View Post

How can I get the man to see this is not how I want to be treated!
Finally stop messing with him once and for all.
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Old Today, 08:04 AM
 
Location: SoCal again
16,082 posts, read 12,851,076 times
Reputation: 31423
Quote:
Originally Posted by JaneMeyer View Post
Actually he disappeared on me. I didn't. I tried to stay in contact with him but he was breadcrumbing me. So I just stayed away and did not contact.
Awwwe, that is cruel. And he is doing it again!! Kick him to the curb.

He only wanted you back because he likes the chase. If he REALLY wanted you, you would not be here, wondering.
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