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Old Yesterday, 11:12 PM
Status: "Mr. C's ❤️" (set 6 days ago)
 
Location: Pacific Northwest
1,553 posts, read 695,751 times
Reputation: 3123

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Quote:
Originally Posted by Blondie19 View Post
I really did not care about being official to be honest...maybe i start to care ?
After a year of seeing each other, I'd certainly want to know where we stood as a couple, if only to know if I was wasting my time or not.

If you're only interested in something casual, then it really doesn't matter.

 
Old Yesterday, 11:16 PM
 
29 posts, read 200 times
Reputation: 10
Well.he says he loves me but yes his age worry me..thats why i ignored him in the beginning.It was not love at first sight.i should have a talk with him sometimes...as you guys stated i know he is not ready for marriage or anythung....im not either.At least i d like to know if we gona keep being a secret.Secret is fine for a while.It can get old though
 
Old Yesterday, 11:19 PM
Status: "Mr. C's ❤️" (set 6 days ago)
 
Location: Pacific Northwest
1,553 posts, read 695,751 times
Reputation: 3123
Quote:
Originally Posted by Blondie19 View Post
He was not in the room at that moment.I told him and he was upset.That was when we first started to date.I was upset too...and we both agreed to keep it private...maybe its time to talk about it again ?
Yes, it's definitely time for another conversation about it.

The bond between you two should be stronger than the criticism against it. Both of you should have confidence in yourselves as a couple... otherwise, why bother being together at all?
 
Old Yesterday, 11:20 PM
 
Location: Middle America
36,698 posts, read 41,969,946 times
Reputation: 50609
My BFF from childhood got married at 39 to a 20-year old dude. They're now 42 and 23 with an almost year-old baby. I was dubious, and didn't meet him till I was in their wedding, but once I met him, I was less skeptical. It can happen.

BUT...he was always all-in on the relationship, from the start. It wasn't hidden, wasn't a secret, it was always official and exclusive, he didn't have a bunch of female peers he didn't want to know he was dating somebody, etc.

For me, being a woman pushing 40 and in a "secret" relationship would get really old, really fast.

The age may be an eyebrow-raising factor to some/most...but really, the biggest red flag here is the fact that he wants to keep the "relationship," such as it is, on the downlow.
 
Old Yesterday, 11:56 PM
 
29 posts, read 200 times
Reputation: 10
Definetely need to have a talk.We bump into each other 3 or 4 times per day.we in same office space...he sure loves lots of attention from men n women.But thats not the point...is that we need to know what we doing.
 
Old Today, 12:19 AM
 
16 posts, read 2,395 times
Reputation: 44
You are old enough to be his mom. It's going to be a tough road to take this on. People will judge you. To each their own but I would not want to deal with someone at that age. Is he still living at home???? Personally I think he is just experimenting, and enjoys attention from others so he's not committed to you.
 
Old Today, 03:59 AM
 
29 posts, read 200 times
Reputation: 10
He is living at home
 
Old Today, 04:02 AM
 
668 posts, read 318,373 times
Reputation: 1406
Oedipal relationship?
 
Old Today, 04:04 AM
 
29 posts, read 200 times
Reputation: 10
I see some of people right here in this forum already judging
 
Old Today, 04:27 AM
 
3,793 posts, read 3,006,882 times
Reputation: 7601
Quote:
Originally Posted by Blondie19 View Post
I see some of people right here in this forum already judging
If you don't want your situation judged, then yes, you are in the wrong forum. I don't know of any judgment-free zones on the internet.
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