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Old 07-22-2019, 04:30 PM
 
Location: Colorado
12,008 posts, read 7,400,896 times
Reputation: 21633

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Quote:
Originally Posted by Carly1983 View Post
Yes, they were escorts, mostly middle class women, not in the US.

In my view, the problem is misogyny that exists in society because some of the abuse my clients described was of the vile misogynistic kind. Some men don't get to sleep with the people they want to, and so they want to pay for sex. OK. But the problem is that society shames women who are overtly sexual or who have sex for money, and so those men who pay for sex might believe that the people who offer sexual services are not worthy of respect, and so they think they can get away with bad behaviour and abuse.

At the same time, there's no way I'd want my nieces or young female family members to consider the sex industry as a worthwhile occupation (simply because I do think sleeping with strangers for money affects one's mental health in a variety of ways) and so I'm not sure I'd want it be quite so accepted in society.

Incidentally, I have a male friend who offers erotic massages (to women) for money, he has never been treated with disrespect or experienced abuse at the hands of his female clients.
I've seen that "yoni massage" thing, I want to know how in the hell that is legal in states where prostitution is illegal. Kind of makes me angry, honestly. Like you can get away with acting like it's somehow not sexual for a woman to get her genitals fondled, even to orgasm, because female sexuality is just SUCH a non-thing that doesn't exist.

Pshaw!! NONSENSE.

See if I had a female relative who wanted to do some kind of sex work, I would really like to have a serious conversation with her. I'd want to know that she is not beset by shame ideology (believe it or not, it's totally possible for a woman to shed this and leave it behind. I have!) I would want to know how she is being safe, and if she is in a place where it is legal, what other sorts of black market elements (drugs? guns? violence?) she might be coming into contact with. What measures are there so that if a "John" gets out of line, he is removed from the premises? Like if all of these things were right, it wouldn't be nearly as bad.

There is a documentary out there where a female couple (bi, I'd assume?) both work in this Nevada brothel, and they talked about all of the safety measures, the standards and expectations, some of the challenges. I really enjoyed it. I don't remember where I found that, though...

I guess what I'm saying is that while I did not imagine that the industry was free of this kind of unfortunate stuff, I feel like it shouldn't HAVE to be that way. I know people in other parts of the industry for whom it ISN'T that way.

 
Old 07-22-2019, 04:38 PM
 
7,638 posts, read 3,002,418 times
Reputation: 12603
Quote:
Originally Posted by TashaPosh View Post
He didn't go to see a dancer.....or the poker.....or the whiskey. That's *silly*.... he went to support his good friend who is getting married.....he's best man & it would be rude not to.
Quote:
Originally Posted by TashaPosh View Post
Lol...Yess! A *public* gentleman's club so they can watch a dancer....or play poker & drink too much whiskey is not prostitutes.....that's a different subject! If someone's Bf or husband spends time with prostitutes, that's a bigger problem than him just supporting his friend getting married.....
But if he didn’t go to this party for any of “that” what did they do, go bowling?
 
Old 07-22-2019, 04:42 PM
 
Location: So Cal
14,795 posts, read 10,839,492 times
Reputation: 14279
I suppose a stripper providing sex acts for money would technically be called a prostitute, or at least stripper/prostitute, but it definitely happens at some bachelor parties, and bachelorette parties, especially home parties.
 
Old 07-22-2019, 05:04 PM
 
Location: New to Bay Area
1,237 posts, read 287,626 times
Reputation: 1108
Quote:
Originally Posted by RbccL View Post
But if he didnít go to this party for any of ďthatĒ what did they do, go bowling?
He went to support his best friend for getting married...because he's the best man. Ofc they drank too much whiskey & watched girls dance.....but I was saying that it wasn't the main reason for going to the club which he wouldn't do if it wasn't for a bachelor party. A bachelor party is in honor of the guy getting married.........just like if I go to a bachelorette party it's in honor of the bride........it's a tradition to celebrate & he went to support his friend, as he should. It would be rude not to.......
 
Old 07-22-2019, 05:09 PM
 
Location: New to Bay Area
1,237 posts, read 287,626 times
Reputation: 1108
Quote:
Originally Posted by SeaOfGrass View Post
I suppose a stripper providing sex acts for money would technically be called a prostitute, or at least stripper/prostitute, but it definitely happens at some bachelor parties, and bachelorette parties, especially home parties.
If your Bf or husband is going to have sex with a prostitute ...in any setting.. there are *lots* more problems in the relationship than just a bachelor party...
 
Old 07-22-2019, 05:43 PM
 
7,638 posts, read 3,002,418 times
Reputation: 12603
Quote:
Originally Posted by TashaPosh View Post
He went to support his best friend for getting married...because he's the best man. Ofc they drank too much whiskey & watched girls dance.....but I was saying that it wasn't the main reason for going to the club which he wouldn't do if it wasn't for a bachelor party. A bachelor party is in honor of the guy getting married.........just like if I go to a bachelorette party it's in honor of the bride........it's a tradition to celebrate & he went to support his friend, as he should. It would be rude not to.......
Oh! I misunderstood and thought you posted he didnít do any of that.
 
Old 07-22-2019, 05:55 PM
 
Location: Brentwood, Tennessee
43,631 posts, read 42,225,424 times
Reputation: 84061
Quote:
Originally Posted by RbccL View Post
Oh! I misunderstood and thought you posted he didnít do any of that.
Ahem, it was a gentleman's club, not a strip club.
 
Old 07-22-2019, 05:55 PM
 
Location: So Cal
14,795 posts, read 10,839,492 times
Reputation: 14279
Quote:
Originally Posted by TashaPosh View Post
If your Bf or husband is going to have sex with a prostitute ...in any setting.. there are *lots* more problems in the relationship than just a bachelor party...
I agree. I'm just saying that it happens for sure.

I've had male relatives tell me what the groom-to-be, and others, were doing with the stripper(s), and even they thought it was totally uncool. My one (married) brother was ashamed of his friend, the groom-to-be, for doing it. So, obviously, just because your man goes, it doesn't mean he's doing anything, but that's what's happening at some (a lot?) of them.
 
Old 07-22-2019, 05:59 PM
 
697 posts, read 329,028 times
Reputation: 1469
I married a mature man.
 
Old 07-22-2019, 06:56 PM
 
Location: New to Bay Area
1,237 posts, read 287,626 times
Reputation: 1108
Quote:
Originally Posted by RbccL View Post
Oh! I misunderstood and thought you posted he didnít do any of that.
No.....the thread is bachelor parties...(or bachelorette) & I was saying it had nothing to do with prostitution...
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