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Old Today, 01:47 PM
 
488 posts, read 310,156 times
Reputation: 350

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Quote:
Originally Posted by Ruth4Truth View Post
Check to see if he wears a ring next time you see him, OP. That could take care of it.
I will if I see him again. I doubt I will unless I get pulled over again, but that was the first time I got pulled over in 10+ years so unlikely to happen.

 
Old Today, 02:17 PM
 
166 posts, read 28,810 times
Reputation: 297
Hope it's not too nosy to ask, and no need to answer if you don't wish to, but I'm wondering how this guy started to stalk you and how you met him just out of curiosity.
 
Old Today, 02:25 PM
 
Location: Colorado
11,936 posts, read 7,347,669 times
Reputation: 21442
OP might already be typing a response, but hey...moongirl, if you're not yet responding... Consider using the "blog" feature to explain the story and posting a link to that here, or people can just go to your profile and find it. I don't know if you've gotten in trouble for that or not. But I did when I was having a complicated time around the point my ex and I broke up. It was the first time I ever got in trouble around here, and it felt really awful considering how badly I needed to be able to talk about things. I didn't realize then, but we do have a blog feature where it's ok to put that stuff. That would have been a better choice.

You can also do this to avoid your threads continuing to get locked. The blogs don't always get a ton of traffic, but what's nice about them... I believe you can delete your entries if one day you decide you don't want all of this "out there." You can't do that in the threads. And if any of us wonders how you're doing, we can check there and find out. Even when I was absent in general from the site forums, I did occasionally post in the spirit of "hey guys, I'm not dead, just in case anyone is wondering."

Just an idea.
 
Old Today, 02:26 PM
 
488 posts, read 310,156 times
Reputation: 350
Quote:
Originally Posted by Carly1983 View Post
Hope it's not too nosy to ask, and no need to answer if you don't wish to, but I'm wondering how this guy started to stalk you and how you met him just out of curiosity.
I havent wanted to say too much about this, protecting my identity. He first came to know of me through my media presence. We never dated or met. Just from knowing my name he tracked down my address through ways that I dont know how, came 2000 miles to show up at my house after I told him I would call the cops on him if he did.
 
Old Today, 02:27 PM
 
488 posts, read 310,156 times
Reputation: 350
Quote:
Originally Posted by Sonic_Spork View Post
OP might already be typing a response, but hey...moongirl, if you're not yet responding... Consider using the "blog" feature to explain the story and posting a link to that here, or people can just go to your profile and find it. I don't know if you've gotten in trouble for that or not. But I did when I was having a complicated time around the point my ex and I broke up. It was the first time I ever got in trouble around here, and it felt really awful considering how badly I needed to be able to talk about things. I didn't realize then, but we do have a blog feature where it's ok to put that stuff. That would have been a better choice.

You can also do this to avoid your threads continuing to get locked. The blogs don't always get a ton of traffic, but what's nice about them... I believe you can delete your entries if one day you decide you don't want all of this "out there." You can't do that in the threads. And if any of us wonders how you're doing, we can check there and find out. Even when I was absent in general from the site forums, I did occasionally post in the spirit of "hey guys, I'm not dead, just in case anyone is wondering."

Just an idea.
This is an excellent idea.
 
Old Today, 02:31 PM
 
166 posts, read 28,810 times
Reputation: 297
Quote:
Originally Posted by moongirl00 View Post
I havent wanted to say too much about this, protecting my identity. He located me through my media presence. We never dated or met. He tracked down my address through ways that I dont know how, came 2000 miles to show up at my house after I told him I would call the cops on him if he did.
OMG. Travelling 2000 miles! Ah OK, I take it from your response you are some kind of public figure or well known in some field/industry. I understand about protecting your identity!
 
Old Today, 02:37 PM
 
488 posts, read 310,156 times
Reputation: 350
Quote:
Originally Posted by Carly1983 View Post
OMG. Travelling 2000 miles! Ah OK, I take it from your response you are some kind of public figure or well known in some field/industry. I understand about protecting your identity!
I am not a famous person or celebrity, but with enough info I could be found if I started going into details. But it was through me publishing stuff that he found me. He was one of the people consuming the media I was publishing (its not porn).
 
Old Today, 02:48 PM
 
488 posts, read 310,156 times
Reputation: 350
So at first he basically wrote a fan email (dont even know how he got that email). Said he loves what I do etc. I responded politely. Then he started blowi.g me up....20 or 30 emails per day I just ignored them. After 3 months of that I replied and told him he is stressing me and sorry but a relationship is not in the cards. Then he just contined escalating the harassmemt, calling my parents, threatening to go to their houses, threatening to "expose" me, finding my address etc. I got police involved and a TRO after about 2 or 3 months of that. This all began over 2 years ago.


.
 
Old Today, 02:55 PM
 
8,098 posts, read 6,026,484 times
Reputation: 5745
Quote:
Originally Posted by Carly1983 View Post
OMG. Travelling 2000 miles! Ah OK, I take it from your response you are some kind of public figure or well known in some field/industry. I understand about protecting your identity!
You don't really have to be a public figure or a famous celebrity to attract someone who is obsessed. When someone takes an obsession with you, it says more about the obsessed person than the one who is being pursued.


I often read about what people who are stalked go through. Among the things they are told is that "it's a compliment", or it means that they are "Oh so awesome that the stalker just couldn't get enough." A lot of people who have been stalked do not really see themselves as all that special and are often perplexed as to what the stalker could see in that person.

Also, there is usually an imbalance in the mind of a stalker. Yes, celebrities are more likely to attract those types. But with the internet and social media, you could be easily found and anything on you can trigger a stalking circumstance.
 
Old Today, 02:57 PM
 
8,098 posts, read 6,026,484 times
Reputation: 5745
Quote:
Originally Posted by moongirl00 View Post
So at first he basically wrote a fan email (dont even know how he got that email). Said he loves what I do etc. I responded politely. Then he started blowi.g me up....20 or 30 emails per day I just ignored them. After 3 months of that I replied and told him he is stressing me and sorry but a relationship is not in the cards. Then he just contined escalating the harassmemt, calling my parents, threatening to go to their houses, threatening to "expose" me, finding my address etc. I got police involved and a TRO after about 2 or 3 months of that. This all began over 2 years ago.


.
I am so glad that action is being taken against this person. But of course, this is not over yet.
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