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Old 07-28-2019, 11:09 AM
 
476 posts, read 92,479 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Azureth View Post
33. Never had a relationship before, and apparently I've been told I come off as "creepy" a lot of the time, and I don't know why, I've never say inappropriately touched a woman except when I was in HS and cut a girls hair (made a topic about it).
If I remember that thread correctly, you came across as someone who had very limited grasp of personal boundaries or why violating these can bear consequences. It was also suggested to you that you should seek professional help to assist you in figuring out why your actions may come across as inappropriate or, as you say here, 'creepy'.

Now I don't know if you are genuine or not, if you have Autism or if you have AMC, or both, or none. Whatever your reason is for asking these 'would a woman date <insert condition> questions, the answer, for the most part, would be 'it depends'.

A tip, though, if you are on a spectrum... Asking these general questions will not help you figure out the opposite sex or the rules of the game. Everyone is different and you cannot anticipate these differences in advance. The trick is in learning how to adjust, which is why you'd need professional help and not a bunch of nobodies, no matter how well-meaning, on some internet forum.
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Old 07-28-2019, 11:40 AM
Lou
 
283 posts, read 113,205 times
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Azureth, have you been properly diagnosed with ASD?

If you're in the US, check with your county's Intermediate Unit. They might offer or know of programs for adults with ASD who want to improve their relationship skills.
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Old 07-28-2019, 12:32 PM
 
4,935 posts, read 1,575,892 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Azureth View Post
33. Never had a relationship before, and apparently I've been told I come off as "creepy" a lot of the time, and I don't know why, I've never say inappropriately touched a woman except when I was in HS and cut a girls hair (made a topic about it).
Oh okay. I just asked because I am autistic as well, so I wondered how long you have been trying for. I tried getting dates since high school, but never succeeded and when I hit 23 about, very slowly but surely, tI got better, and things started coming around.

I researched and read books like Double Your Dating, and They Mystery Method: How To Get Beautiful Women Into Bed, and those helped a lot. I would highly recommend those books.
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Old 07-28-2019, 08:18 PM
 
Location: Forest bathing
1,648 posts, read 982,056 times
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Our daughter is 31 and I suspect she is on the Autism spectrum. She is highly intelligent but is prone to occasional outbursts and lacks social awareness. She was seeing a guy who is super smart but had some peculiarities like singing out loud with nonsense words or would have to be told step by step how to do the simplest task. My daughter and I are alike in that respect. He was not interested in an intimate relationship so she said good bye.

She dated an electrician for awhile but he wanted marriage and kids but she didn’t. He liked her bluntness; she pulls no punches.

Now, she is seeing a guy who is different but not on the spectrum as far as my untrained eye can see. He is a musician and cartoonist and goofy in a likable sort of way. They share several interests but the relationship is young.

So, if you want to date, find someone like yourself. My daughter kept to herself for some time until she figured out that her life was in her hands.
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Old 07-28-2019, 08:36 PM
 
7,563 posts, read 2,986,891 times
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I wonder how many of us have “passed” on someone who was autistic, without knowing it? Like we tried to chat for awhile, and something didn’t go very smoothly, strange choice of words, long awkward pause...I think it may be better to go ahead and explain yourself, a person may be more understanding of your communication style.
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Old 07-28-2019, 10:53 PM
 
Location: St. Louis
9,612 posts, read 17,231,598 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by RbccL View Post
I wonder how many of us have “passed” on someone who was autistic, without knowing it? Like we tried to chat for awhile, and something didn’t go very smoothly, strange choice of words, long awkward pause...I think it may be better to go ahead and explain yourself, a person may be more understanding of your communication style.
I was wondering the exact same thing last night. I was trying to talk to a man one night and he seemed extremely interested but then he never asked me out and I was confused by that and then years later he posted something on Facebook about being on the spectrum. It’s not always obvious and I was surprised I didn’t catch it because I was teaching special ed at the time. He always loves everything I post on FB.
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Old Yesterday, 08:33 PM
Status: "Life is amazing." (set 17 hours ago)
 
Location: Central Florida
349 posts, read 453,101 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Azureth View Post
33. Never had a relationship before, and apparently I've been told I come off as "creepy" a lot of the time, and I don't know why, I've never say inappropriately touched a woman except when I was in HS and cut a girls hair (made a topic about it).
Sorry the persons giving you feedback about the "creepy" stuff haven't been more helpful. Not having met you, I can imagine you just behave according to a different set of rules, that are just outside social norms. I'm dating a guy that I suspect is somewhere on the autistic spectrum. He definitely is overly anxious in social settings, and will really say some awkward things to his friends. But he's brilliant, highly intelligent, and one of the kindest souls I've ever met, so if you can work that angle, you may find just what you're looking for.
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Old Yesterday, 10:34 PM
 
1,230 posts, read 369,171 times
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Haven't you asked this before?
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Old Today, 05:13 AM
 
12,482 posts, read 9,973,117 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Azureth View Post
Would you, and generally, do you think guys with it have much of a chance finding a woman?
Autism? Sure. Someone motivated to "find a woman"? Hell no.
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Old Today, 05:55 AM
 
691 posts, read 325,580 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by chessimprov View Post
I think to hear that stigma of "no" automatically is awful. Just because a person is socially awkward doesn't mean they can't take care of themselves. There are people who are very successful, yet are on the spectrum and some people are probably undiagnosed.

Part of the reason people on the spectrum have a harder time is because people have preconceived notions that anyone with a label is not dateable. Having a physical disability of a prosthetic leg, depression, maybe bipolar or maybe anxiety depending on the interactions with those people with others, seem to be more acceptable. Higher functioning forms of autism should be on this list at the very least, but I don't feel that is the case because people don't want to understand it.

"Nerds" are becoming more the rave, and ironically, a significant number of autistic people could fall under such a realm.


Seriously? Thanks for the general admonishment......

I am very social.....I cannot handle introverts. In a way, they are socially awkward.

I don't like to watch sports....I did not date sports fans.

Choosing a mate is a personal choice in their abilities, attributes, etc.

I “understand” Asbergers, Autism, depression, bi-polar etc. And the various spectrums. It is a no for me. (I have family members who struggle with these.). I am sympathetic with the struggles but I am also realistic in how I want to live my life. My father had undiagnosed manic depression. Older brother is undiagnosed Asberger.
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