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Old 08-03-2019, 11:54 AM
 
44 posts, read 27,332 times
Reputation: 124

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Quote:
Originally Posted by ellie View Post
You know, some brain meds can also make you feel dead inside. Itís almost as oppressive as the depression they are meant to treat.

Youíve spent the last year going through the proper motions to move on from your last relationship and youíve gotten good responses from the women youíre dating. There are two things going on: emotionally you havenít healed yet and the meds, if youíre still taking them, are reducing both your libido and enthusiasm.

Damned if you do, damned if you donít. Have you talked to your doctor about changing your prescription? There are some that can boost your mood and restore your drive.

If youíre otherwise healthy, add weight training and cardio to your treatment plan. Building muscle increases your testosterone level, or so Iíve been told...haha. The cardio will clear out the mental cobwebs and allow you to burn away some of your anger and remorse. Maybe you need to get out in nature and yell at some rocks or go on a fast.

And quit drinking/smoking for a bit. You need your health for the long haul.
I've changed prescriptions several times, quit smoking a year ago, rarely drink, and I try to work out regularly. That's why I am starting to get desperate and even a little scared: I've gone through all the proper motions, but I'm not improving as much as I'd hoped.
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Old 08-03-2019, 11:56 AM
 
44 posts, read 27,332 times
Reputation: 124
Quote:
Originally Posted by beckycat View Post
Maybe you just aren't ready? It sounds like you still aren't over your ex. I know you want to move on but you first have to get over your ex and work on yourself. Give yourself time to grieve. Are you depressed? Are you still in therapy? What does your therapist say?
That's why I thought a year would be "enough time to grieve." And yes, I am depressed, though I have some good days on occasion.
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Old 08-03-2019, 12:10 PM
 
Location: a primitive state
9,909 posts, read 20,233,799 times
Reputation: 12481
Quote:
Originally Posted by Boddicker View Post
I've changed prescriptions several times, quit smoking a year ago, rarely drink, and I try to work out regularly. That's why I am starting to get desperate and even a little scared: I've gone through all the proper motions, but I'm not improving as much as I'd hoped.
Wow, yeah. Good work. I donít know. Traveled any?
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Old 08-03-2019, 12:19 PM
 
Location: Kaliforneea
1,290 posts, read 963,971 times
Reputation: 2162
it may take years, to figure it out bro
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Old 08-03-2019, 12:33 PM
 
904 posts, read 236,548 times
Reputation: 1572
Quote:
Originally Posted by ellie View Post
Wow, yeah. Good work. I donít know. Traveled any?
This. New travel adventures have a way of purging the mind. A group trip where things are preplanned with exciting sights and activities that consume your attention might help. Might also help you forge a bond with someone.
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Old 08-03-2019, 01:14 PM
 
455 posts, read 82,071 times
Reputation: 847
You sound depressed and you do not sound ready to date. Lack of libido is a signal. You need some time to feel your old self again. I don't think dating will help you at this stage.
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Old 08-03-2019, 01:15 PM
 
455 posts, read 82,071 times
Reputation: 847
Quote:
Originally Posted by Boddicker View Post
That's why I thought a year would be "enough time to grieve." And yes, I am depressed, though I have some good days on occasion.
Grieving doesn't happen on your timeline, it has its own timeline.
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Old 08-03-2019, 01:16 PM
 
455 posts, read 82,071 times
Reputation: 847
Quote:
Originally Posted by Boddicker View Post
I think you are right, but I was always hearing that a new relationship would help me get over the previous one.
That's called being on the rebound. Focus on you.
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Old 08-03-2019, 01:49 PM
 
Location: State of Transition
79,144 posts, read 71,197,645 times
Reputation: 77279
Quote:
Originally Posted by Boddicker View Post
I think you are right, but I was always hearing that a new relationship would help me get over the previous one.
This is bad advice. For one thing, those rebound relationships rarely last, and who wants to be someone's rebound? That's not a nice thing to do to somebody.
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Old 08-03-2019, 02:25 PM
 
1,224 posts, read 1,363,289 times
Reputation: 1923
You say that you loved each other and parted amicably. Have you considered a long distance relationship with her?
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