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Old Yesterday, 06:04 AM
 
Location: Middle America
36,840 posts, read 42,160,518 times
Reputation: 50842

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My parents met at a bar in 1971. They were both out with friends, and the two groups started talking.

 
Old Yesterday, 07:44 AM
 
Location: Hockey Rulez, Texas
819 posts, read 265,034 times
Reputation: 1283
Quote:
Originally Posted by rya96797 View Post
and decides to report you for sexual harrassment/assault.
Just flirting with a woman in public - and if ya hit it off in a few minutes... Asking for her phone number, will NOT get you in trouble. Not to mention, there will be cameras in the store. Once again - I was not saying that you would walk up to a woman, and ask her for her phone number right away.

as for all the other recent follow up posts - why not try it. Hell, it doesn't cost anything. It's not like $150 to join an online dating site. Give it a shot. Be willing to adjust your approach as it goes. Ya never know. Nothing ventured, nothing gained!
 
Old Yesterday, 08:08 AM
 
14,492 posts, read 17,463,326 times
Reputation: 11291
If you are the type to ask this question, then I wouldn't advise you to do it, because you'll probably be too scared. The guys who have confidence would not ask a question like this. They would just do it and wouldn't think twice about it.
 
Old Yesterday, 08:42 AM
 
139 posts, read 27,651 times
Reputation: 302
Op, to be honest, if you interacted well with women in general you would never need to post a question like this. Fact is, most people who go to the store are there with a purpose, and rarely is it to give out their phone number. Now there ARE guys who interact with women very well, but I don't think in your case it would be a good idea to do what you're asking us.

Think about it like this, how many guys out of 100 do you think could just go to a store and randomly pull a crap ton of phone numbers? I'm sure there are a few, but MOST guys definitely couldn't! The guys that can have done this alot before aka playas
 
Old Yesterday, 08:55 AM
 
Location: Pittsburgh
22,681 posts, read 24,276,580 times
Reputation: 49302
Quote:
Originally Posted by PardonTheInterruption View Post
Op, to be honest, if you interacted well with women in general you would never need to post a question like this. Fact is, most people who go to the store are there with a purpose, and rarely is it to give out their phone number. Now there ARE guys who interact with women very well, but I don't think in your case it would be a good idea to do what you're asking us.

Think about it like this, how many guys out of 100 do you think could just go to a store and randomly pull a crap ton of phone numbers? I'm sure there are a few, but MOST guys definitely couldn't! The guys that can have done this alot before aka playas
That's the thing--it's not unheard of for people to flirt or strike up a conversation while running errands. But when these interactions are successful, it's because they're organic, they just happen and there's a level of social awareness. It's not because some dude is trolling the produce section or waiting outside Target like a panhandler asking every woman in sight if she wants to be his girlfriend.
 
Old Yesterday, 08:59 AM
 
12,553 posts, read 9,997,301 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by fleetiebelle View Post
That's the thing--it's not unheard of for people to flirt or strike up a conversation while running errands. But when these interactions are successful, it's because they're organic, they just happen and there's a level of social awareness. It's not because some dude is trolling the produce section or waiting outside Target like a panhandler asking every woman in sight if she wants to be his girlfriend.
Yes.
 
Old Yesterday, 09:11 AM
 
139 posts, read 27,651 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by fleetiebelle View Post
But when these interactions are successful, it's because they're organic
Yes, these are the type of guys I'm talking about (of which the op is not).The kind who naturally interact well enough with women that they could even do this at a Target. They don't post these questions. Don't do it op
 
Old Yesterday, 09:19 AM
 
8,224 posts, read 6,068,821 times
Reputation: 5843
Quote:
Originally Posted by somebodynew View Post
Not freaking out is a pretty low bar of desirable human reaction
Giving how people act these days, it should be considered a blessing. People in my area seem to think it's acceptible to walk up to someone, get in their space, stare at them and then ask an imappropriate question (Where do you live? for example) Kinda hard to not freak out at that, but admittedly possible.



And just walking up asking for numbers, of course that's not going to get anywhere. I'm pretty sure that's not what the OP meant (hopefully).

Striking a casual conversation in the grocery store leading to the possibility of number exchanges is better
 
Old Yesterday, 09:20 AM
 
Location: Pittsburgh
22,681 posts, read 24,276,580 times
Reputation: 49302
Quote:
Originally Posted by PardonTheInterruption View Post
Yes, these are the type of guys I'm talking about (of which the op is not).The kind who naturally interact well enough with women that they could even do this at a Target. They don't post these questions. Don't do it op
I'm a naturally awkward person myself, but I really feel for these guys (and it's usually guys, don't @ me) who seem like they've gotten to adulthood without interacting successfully with other human beings. And it's not just about asking women out. I get the sense that they're not just bad with women, they're awkward with people in general. I wonder how they are at work, or with their friends and family.
 
Old Yesterday, 09:23 AM
 
764 posts, read 198,256 times
Reputation: 1023
Quote:
Originally Posted by somebodynew View Post
Life pro tip. MOST women don't walk around waiting to be "approached" by guys. Most women want to have *something* in common with the guys before the thought of going out with them even crosses their mind. My daughter learned at the ripe old age of 13 that boys will ask her out just because she is pretty. They don't know jack about her. What kind of music she likes. What she likes to do for fun. Many of us don't LIKE the fact that the only thing that a guy considers is whether or not she has an owner... um, husband or boyfriend.

Most of us, when making the big exciting trip to Target to acquire a man, are actually not. We are there to get our housewares, our cleaning supplies. I can tell you what I am thinking when it happens to me. Because, despite what one guy is saying up thread, it does happen. And quite a lot. I am pushing my cart with my groceries. And a guy asks me what I am doing? I look at him for a second as if he lost his mind. Um, pushing my groceries to my car where I will unload them. Can I help??!! No, (um) thanks. I have arms. And hands. What are you doing tonight? This is where I start to get annoyed. And want to reply something like ... well not punching you in the face since I am going to do that right here, right now. Of course I don't say that. I smile and say something benign like, none of your business. Or I might be snarky and say, picking my teeth. I love picking my teeth. I have actually said something like, I am going to bang the **** out of my **** buddy. I love it when we get together. He can do such amazing things with his mouth.

Men. Stop. Just Stop. If you don't have a life, get one. A girlfriend is not magically going to get one for you.

I was chatting with a guy from OKC. When I asked him what he liked to do for fun, he said he never really did anything but work. When he gets a woman, he wants the woman to light up his life. Think about that. What FUN! I cannot WAIT to take on the responsibility for lighting up someone's life! Giving them the wild and cray idea to go DO SOMETHING.

Just no.
Bingo. Even under the best circumstances that can arise from a chance encounter out in public...an organic, pleasant, friendly conversation in which the woman feels completely at ease...the chances that she wants a man to ask her out are very, very slim. More likely she just wants to be spoken with like a human being, to have a nice interaction with a fellow person without the conversation being a prelude to a pass at sex or a relationship. Politeness and friendliness are not signs of interest. The chances that she would want to date a guy because she had a nice friendly conversation with him...or even two, three, four friendly conversations with him over a period of time...are slim-to-none, and if she does, she’ll drop him overt signals.

Women go to the store to shop, they go to work to work, they go to bars and clubs with friends so they can hang out with friends, they go to focus activities like painting, athletic, or dance groups to participate in those activities, they go to church to worship, they’re at the airport or riding the bus to get from place to place, they’re at the restaurant to have a meal, they’re at the pool or beach to swim. Guys are the ones who go to places like that with ulterior motives of finding and meeting women with the intention to date them. If you have the urge to ask a woman out in public chances are very good that you wouldn’t be the first guy to do so...if they wanted a boyfriend, they almost certainly have one already. They don’t want to be asked out by guys simply by existing in a place. It’s fine to talk to them (as long as you’re talking to them as part of normal socializing...meaning, talk to anyone and everyone, not just attractive women). Not okay to ask them out.
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