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Old Yesterday, 12:09 PM
 
Location: In a place beyond human comprehension
7,711 posts, read 4,936,773 times
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Ugh...so cringy...

I don't think most people who have organic natural relationships did any calculating or planning like this....they just spontaneously talked to people by being able to properly read situations and social cues. OP you're doing way too much in my eyes.....

There isn't really a right way or good way to explain it. It's more of an intuition type of thing.

 
Old Yesterday, 12:27 PM
 
8,224 posts, read 6,068,821 times
Reputation: 5843
Quote:
Originally Posted by RbccL View Post
^^^Omg, that was perfect! There’s a guy like that right here...

[Snip.]
There's quite a few in my town.

Last edited by PJSaturn; Yesterday at 11:52 PM..
 
Old Yesterday, 12:44 PM
 
Location: northern New England
2,531 posts, read 1,105,543 times
Reputation: 9823
OP, there are places people go to meet other people - bars, Meetup groups, online dating. It can be very annoying to be approached when you are shopping, getting coffee, picking up your dry cleaning, etc.



Picture a female that you find very unattractive (for whatever reason). She hits on you as you are getting out of work. Next day, another female you want nothing to do with approaches you in the grocery. After a while it would get tiresome, right? I am not saying YOU are unattractive, I am trying to get you to see what unwanted approaches are like.
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Old Yesterday, 01:19 PM
 
Location: (six-cent-dix-sept)
4,622 posts, read 2,357,665 times
Reputation: 2861
Quote:
Originally Posted by rya96797 View Post
It happens enough. And it mostly depends on the woman's perception. If it's a guy that's pretty good looking, makes reasonably smooth approaches, etc. she is more willing to accept or at least not outright reject the advances and call the cops.

On the other hand, what it if was a "weird" looking awkward ugly guy that wasn't smooth and made her feel uncomfortable? then of course the woman would "strike out in anger" or call security. The intent of the guy in both situations might be the same, but perception of the woman matters most on how well those advances would be received.
regardless of looks, i think if someone is talented with charisma and charm then it wont be awkward.

but half of us have below average personality so it will be awkward.
 
Old Yesterday, 02:26 PM
 
753 posts, read 450,814 times
Reputation: 660
Quote:
Originally Posted by stanley-88888888 View Post
regardless of looks, i think if someone is talented with charisma and charm then it wont be awkward.

but half of us have below average personality so it will be awkward.
well, there's been studies that show that women are very picky when it comes to physical attraction, which is mostly what you're offering when making cold approaches in front of a store. I think the statistic was they rated 80% of men unattractive. on the other hand, if you're a showstopper, then you wont have any issues, BUT if that were the case, the OP wouldnt have to start a thread about talking to random women in malls
 
Old Yesterday, 02:33 PM
 
753 posts, read 450,814 times
Reputation: 660
Quote:
Originally Posted by TJenkins602 View Post
Nothing wrong with a conversation while shopping. I'm personally the last person to initiate a conversation anywhere. I personally do not see how meeting someone at a grocery store can work. But I'm not going to brand anyone desperate, weird, pervert just because they said "Hi" to me or struck up a brief conversation. I'm a grouch and I see value in human interaction. As long as they keep it casual.

I also mentioned "talking is ok, ulterior motives to hit on or date is not. "

So yeah i agree, nothing is wrong with light conversation, should the opportunity arise. But attempting to parlay "good morning" into a sexual advance is weird.
 
Old Yesterday, 03:03 PM
 
995 posts, read 280,590 times
Reputation: 2790
Quote:
Originally Posted by Silverlight04 View Post
I mean how would I approach a random girl I find attractive shopping in target ? What would I need to say and if I asked them for their phone number or if they would like to be my girl friend would they be turned off ?
Why would someone who knows nothing about you except that you're some random dude who walked up to them and liked their looks, want to be your girlfriend???

As others have said, why not get to know people and know whether you actually want them to be your girlfriend? Otherwise you're just going to be back on here complaining that there are no good women, when you're making your choices based on looks rather than personality.


Quote:
Originally Posted by Sydney123 View Post
So OP... yes it is perfectly acceptable to approach a woman in a public place like Target.
With the caveat that it is also perfectly acceptable for her not to want to stop what she's doing to chat to a stranger, especially one who's trying to get in her pants.


Quote:
Originally Posted by Silverlight04 View Post
Well sometimes when I am at target walking through those walk path ways and there are like groups of teens/early 20s girls together some of them look at me so I’m assuming they think I’m attractive because they are eyeing me
Or... maybe... they are just looking at a person walking by. If every person my eyes happened to pass over thought it was because found them attractive, I wouldn't be able to go anywhere.

I'm kind of afraid now to ask how old you are... hopefully also a teenager.


Mod cut.

Quote:
Originally Posted by rya96797 View Post
I also mentioned "talking is ok, ulterior motives to hit on or date is not. "

So yeah i agree, nothing is wrong with light conversation, should the opportunity arise. But attempting to parlay "good morning" into a sexual advance is weird.
Agreed, but the impression I get in the world is that men don't make "light conversation" with women-- if they're talking to one, it's because they're trying to get with her, and they wouldn't just "make friendly conversation" with a woman they weren't interested in.


Quote:
Originally Posted by Silverlight04 View Post
I’m trying to find the best way to approach a lady at target, if I were in the women’s shoe section and I saw a cute lady looking at shoes could I say something like those shoes are very beautiful and they would look great on you?
Why would you? This is all I can think of when you suggest that: https://youtu.be/BNi7SjgxQQI?t=32

Last edited by PJSaturn; Yesterday at 11:54 PM.. Reason: Orphaned and off-topic.
 
Old Yesterday, 03:11 PM
 
12,553 posts, read 9,997,301 times
Reputation: 16254
Is there no one even the slightest bit concerned about the women who this dude is likely to creep the heck out?
 
Old Yesterday, 03:20 PM
 
753 posts, read 450,814 times
Reputation: 660
Quote:
Originally Posted by K12144 View Post

Agreed, but the impression I get in the world is that men don't make "light conversation" with women-- if they're talking to one, it's because they're trying to get with her, and they wouldn't just "make friendly conversation" with a woman they weren't interested in.

i think it really depends... situations where you might end up talking to other men or women and not be weird is situations where you're waiting, like in checkout lines or in aisles regarding certain products. I think the assumption that if a dude talks to you, he's definitely interested sexually is a pretty dangerous one.

On the other hand, if by "light conversation with women", you mean guys like the OP following women around attempting to pick them up, then yeah your impression is accurate. lol
 
Old Yesterday, 03:24 PM
 
Location: Canada
9,109 posts, read 8,396,110 times
Reputation: 19594
Quote:
Originally Posted by somebodynew View Post
Is there no one even the slightest bit concerned about the women who this dude is likely to creep the heck out?
Of course not, because it's all about how he feels, to heck with how women might feel.
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