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Old 08-09-2019, 11:21 PM
Status: "Make sure you include me in your manifesto" (set 14 days ago)
 
Location: Posting from my space yacht.
8,317 posts, read 3,251,653 times
Reputation: 14900

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Quote:
Originally Posted by Carly1983 View Post
Please don't derail the thread with the MGTOW stuff. Most of the intelligent men I know are already coupled up in a committed way.
I am also coupled in a committed way. This thread has already taken some strange turns though. It's not exactly off topic to point out that some very sane people might want nothing to do with this game.
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Old 08-09-2019, 11:23 PM
 
Location: Continental Europe
722 posts, read 133,994 times
Reputation: 1130
What strange turns were they...women discussing casual sex?
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Old 08-09-2019, 11:39 PM
 
177 posts, read 35,734 times
Reputation: 367
Shoooot, this thread has everything...casual sex about women in general...shifted to the op's situation...cat fights/minor skirmishes ;-)... insight from polyamorists and swingers...the occasional mgtow comment..and self-realization at the end. Yeah, this was a good one!
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Old 08-09-2019, 11:43 PM
 
Location: Continental Europe
722 posts, read 133,994 times
Reputation: 1130
Quote:
Originally Posted by PardonTheInterruption View Post
Shoooot, this thread has everything...casual sex about women in general...shifted to the op's situation...cat fights/minor skirmishes ;-)... insight from polyamorists and swingers...the occasional mgtow comment..and self-realization at the end. Yeah, this was a good one!
LOL. Glad you enjoyed it !
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Old 08-10-2019, 04:44 AM
 
21,053 posts, read 16,871,551 times
Reputation: 39392
Quote:
Originally Posted by Fifty Seven View Post
You said a lot in that short sentence. A succinct description of a problem that has infected our society from the inside out. And it's not just a man problem. These men don't exist in a vacuum.
Itís not always nor even usually that the men do not want commitment. In my case often they just didnít want it with me. Lets stay on topic.
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Old 08-10-2019, 05:05 AM
 
12,843 posts, read 10,070,758 times
Reputation: 16445
Quote:
Originally Posted by Fifty Seven View Post
You said a lot in that short sentence. A succinct description of a problem that has infected our society from the inside out. And it's not just a man problem. These men don't exist in a vacuum.
What is the actual problem? Throwing out the old rule book around marriage and relationships sounds like a good thing to me.
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Old 08-10-2019, 07:19 AM
 
656 posts, read 340,825 times
Reputation: 476
I think marriage benefits men more than women. Especially these days, its often the woman who does most of the housework, shopping, and child rearing, as well as contributing at least half of the household income.

Just from what Ive observed, men are becoming increasingly entitled and lazy. Now they want a beautiful wife who not only supports him financially but waits on him hand and foot and she has to look like a fitness model while doing it.

Maybe Im overgeneralizing but its what Ive observed.

Im willing to contribute half of whatever to a partnership, but during the courtship phases I just realized what they were seeking was not going to work out. They were too demanding.

MGTOW is an interesting concept. Frankly I find it a bit foolish for a man to opt for that if he thinks hes getting a better deal staying single. If hes doing it out of some progressive philosophy around social change then I can get behind that more.
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Old 08-10-2019, 07:29 AM
 
21,053 posts, read 16,871,551 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by moongirl00 View Post
I think marriage benefits men more than women. Especially these days, its often the woman who does most of the housework, shopping, and child rearing, as well as contributing at least half of the household income.

Just from what Ive observed, men are becoming increasingly entitled and lazy. Now they want a beautiful wife who not only supports him financially but waits on him hand and foot and she has to look like a fitness model while doing it.

Maybe Im overgeneralizing but its what Ive observed.

Im willing to contribute half of whatever to a partnership, but during the courtship phases I just realized what they were seeking was not going to work out. They were too demanding.

MGTOW is an interesting concept. Frankly I find it a bit foolish for a man to opt for that if he thinks hes getting a better deal staying single. If hes doing it out of some progressive philosophy around social change then I can get behind that more.
Statistically, the two groups who live longest are single women and married men. Single men die sooner than married men, but married women die sooner than single women. So the marriage benefit is to men in that area.

Regardless of differences. A. Most young men and women still want a life partner and kids, that hasn’t changed as much as people think. And B. IMO it benefits everyone to have a partner in life. The patients we get in rehab that don’t have anyone at home who will help them are more likely to never be able to go home. My honey and I both benefit in many ways having a partner from finances to time to simply one of us being better at different things the other can’t do (I can’t fix things, he is bad at organization so I do all the financial stuff.).

He did get totally screwed in his first marriage, and has lifetime alimony. Which screws me, too. That isn’t about women though or even marriage, that’s due to him being young and making a very poor choice of a bipolar woman who was not a nice person. Most people don’t paint all of any gender with such a broad brush that they will stay alone forever rather than commit again.

Finances though are a tough issue for any couple, and we had our share of issues. We both make decent money, but of course he has a lot that comes out of his for alimony, while I have a lot that comes out of mine for health insurance. We both contribute what we can. The bigger issues I think are around spending.,We had many fights that began with “why did you spend $37 at Popeyes when we need a septic system?” Or him taking his parents for dinner and choosing a place that cost $180. He didn’t have good financial role models and IMO has a poor person mentality about money, which keeps you poor. So we had a lot to work through. It’s not simply a matter of how much do we make and who contributes what.

Last edited by ocnjgirl; 08-10-2019 at 07:39 AM..
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Old 08-10-2019, 07:36 AM
 
656 posts, read 340,825 times
Reputation: 476
If I had a husband it would be nice if he did things like the yardwork, fiing taxes, and helped pay the bills etc. And he was a nice guy. Not to be sexist but yardwork and taxes are just my least favorite things to do. But our personalities would also need to mesh very well.

Ive been trapped in bad relationships before so I am just very wary of being trapped again. Just my experience.
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Old 08-10-2019, 07:44 AM
 
177 posts, read 35,734 times
Reputation: 367
Quote:
Originally Posted by moongirl00 View Post
I think marriage benefits men more than women. Especially these days, its often the woman who does most of the housework, shopping, and child rearing, as well as contributing at least half of the household income.

Just from what Ive observed, men are becoming increasingly entitled and lazy. Now they want a beautiful wife who not only supports him financially but waits on him hand and foot and she has to look like a fitness model while doing it.

Maybe Im overgeneralizing but its what Ive observed.
.
I think you are overgeneralizing and I think the above is sexist. If any guy on this board were to make similar statements like yours, he'd get called out by atleast 6 or 7 posters (you'd probably be one), so it's not ok for you to do it either.

I can only speak for myself; I work, I come home and cook (more than half of the time), I do the yard work every 2weeks, we divide tasks around the house and we BOTH are active in raising our child. A LOT of guys do this! (I'm not a rare breed).. just like every woman/wife is NOT perfect neither is evey guy. That statement was such a negative, provocative, overgeneralizing one that you actually sound like a MGTOW. I wonder if I'll be the one to get slammed for taking exception to your unfair remark
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