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Old 08-15-2019, 03:25 AM
 
13,049 posts, read 10,112,525 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Metaphysique View Post
It depends on the woman.

But for me, as a first, second, third or whatever date, unless he was a high-earner and we really hit it off, it would eyebrow raising. I went on a few first or early dates where the date spent $100+ for the entire meal, but dropping even $200 for an entire meal is a rare event, for a special occasion, while in a long-term relationship.

However, Iíd be totally into visiting a three star Michelin restaurant in SF for a special occasion, even at $300 per person. Itís the overall experience, and at that level, world-class, itís an art form. So, yeah, Iíd definitely partake in the experience for a very special occasion.
I think I would spend the week before wondering what the heck you wear to a place like that. Would I wind up throwing down a ton of money just to not feel like an idiot when I walked in?

 
Old 08-15-2019, 05:28 AM
 
1,097 posts, read 686,071 times
Reputation: 3373
$200 per plate? So like, $400 total for 2 people? Do places like that actually exist? Because I can't imagine anyone wanting to go to a place like that voluntarily.
 
Old 08-15-2019, 07:20 AM
 
Location: Continental Europe
746 posts, read 149,896 times
Reputation: 1196
Quote:
Originally Posted by calipoppy View Post
I'm from LA and there are a LOT of men who spend money this way as their normal. They aren't bragging or flaunting their wealth. These men simply have the means to spend money in larger sums than the average. Some men have money while others do not...no need to judge either way. But I am not understanding the need to demonize men for spending their wealth however they desire. Its so weird to read the comments about the cost of a meal freaking some women out. One poster even saying that the guy is most likely a date rapist. This topic is sparking questions in my head about why so many women make ridiculous (and negative) assumptions about men based on simple gestures of traditional manhood.
It's not demonising, more saying, wouldn't be compatible with someone who spends that much on eating out. Nothing wrong with ruling out a relationship based on different values.
 
Old 08-15-2019, 07:24 AM
 
4,178 posts, read 1,791,724 times
Reputation: 8498
Quote:
Originally Posted by ChiGal7 View Post
$200 per plate? So like, $400 total for 2 people? Do places like that actually exist? Because I can't imagine anyone wanting to go to a place like that voluntarily.
There are MANY places that are more than $200 per person, like Alinea in the Chicago area. However, you are paying for a full experience with many tastings or courses, not just one main course. I havenít ever been to a place that charges $200 for one course. I have been to places where they might charge $200+ per person for everything, but you would get many courses and possibly a wine pairing with that. They are very special occasion places that are not at all appropriate for a first or second date. That said, my cousin and her husband LOVE these type of places and travel just to go to them, so it might be appropriate if you are that type of couple. I think that is how they got together in the first place. I donít know how often they go, but I would imagine they arenít just doing it for an average date.
 
Old 08-15-2019, 07:25 AM
 
10,733 posts, read 4,329,950 times
Reputation: 27073
Quote:
Originally Posted by calipoppy View Post
I am a woman and I don't negatively judge men of means for being men of means.
I judge by how showy they are with their wealth especially in the case of those who may not be as wealthy and would be intimidated, or, conversely, whether they freely spend money they don't have.
 
Old 08-15-2019, 07:28 AM
 
10,733 posts, read 4,329,950 times
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So can we clarify this "first date"?

Is this a date between two people who have never met and have no real way to know who the other person is - as in, OLD, where they've only exchanged texts, emails and phone conversations? OR, is this a first date of a couple who have known each other awhile and know they are very attracted to each other?

In the first case, where they are meeting for the first time, a very expensive dinner doesn't seem the way to go.

In the other case, where the woman would know a man's lifestyle and know that he can easily afford an extravagant dinner and this is his way of demonstrating how much he's interested in her and appreciates her company, it might be more appropriate. Especially if he (and even better if she) routinely dines in this way and would know the restaurant. In that case, going to a local very casual restaurant would be odd.
 
Old 08-15-2019, 07:30 AM
 
Location: Hartford CT
1,865 posts, read 2,070,132 times
Reputation: 3332
This is such a broad question, so as you can see you will get an array of answers. First of all is it a first date? And even if it is what are the ages of the people dating and how much money do they make? I personally know a couple that went to a restaurant that was very expensive on a first date, where that amount of money would be spent, but they also make a WHOLE lot of money, and it was no big deal to them. They eventually got married a year later. So I personally believe MOST people no matter where they live would not pay that much money on a first date, and the ones who do, more than likely wouldn't post about it here.
 
Old 08-15-2019, 08:01 AM
 
Location: East Coast of the United States
17,500 posts, read 19,758,404 times
Reputation: 13357
Quote:
Originally Posted by Ruth4Truth View Post
This is why questions like this are so pointless. They seem to assume women think alike. Such a waste of time. I can't help noticing, that the OP hasn't returned, to respond to my earlier question, about whether this is a sincere inquiry related to someone's real life situation, or just a topic he picked off a bro blog or discussion on Reddit.
People obviously do dine out at very expensive restaurants, right? So, it was a simple question about whether this was appropriate to do on a date.

Say that a man is attracted to a woman and wants to make her feel very special. That kind of a situation. For a man who makes a 6-figure income, spending a few hundred dollars on dinner for a special lady isn't that big of a deal.
 
Old 08-15-2019, 08:11 AM
 
Location: Wisconsin
17,314 posts, read 17,628,618 times
Reputation: 42343
Quote:
Originally Posted by ClaraC View Post
So can we clarify this "first date"?

Is this a date between two people who have never met and have no real way to know who the other person is - as in, OLD, where they've only exchanged texts, emails and phone conversations? OR, is this a first date of a couple who have known each other awhile and know they are very attracted to each other?

In the first case, where they are meeting for the first time, a very expensive dinner doesn't seem the way to go.

In the other case, where the woman would know a man's lifestyle and know that he can easily afford an extravagant dinner and this is his way of demonstrating how much he's interested in her and appreciates her company, it might be more appropriate. Especially if he (and even better if she) routinely dines in this way and would know the restaurant. In that case, going to a local very casual restaurant would be odd.
Well said.
 
Old 08-15-2019, 08:16 AM
 
Location: Canada
9,132 posts, read 8,433,430 times
Reputation: 19667
Quote:
Originally Posted by BigCityDreamer View Post
People obviously do dine out at very expensive restaurants, right? So, it was a simple question about whether this was appropriate to do on a date.

Say that a man is attracted to a woman and wants to make her feel very special. That kind of a situation. For a man who makes a 6-figure income, spending a few hundred dollars on dinner for a special lady isn't that big of a deal.
I think you'd make a woman feel special by knowing her and gearing your efforts toward something she'd like. That may or may not be pricey food, depending on the woman.
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