U.S. CitiesCity-Data Forum Index
Go Back   City-Data Forum > General Forums > Relationships
 [Register]
Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
View detailed profile (Advanced) or search
site with Google Custom Search

Search Forums  (Advanced)
Reply Start New Thread
 
Old 08-20-2019, 01:08 AM
 
344 posts, read 109,262 times
Reputation: 257

Advertisements

My ex boyfriend and I went out tonight. He had asked to talk and take me to dinner. At first I wasn't so nice as the break up, like most, was bad. He asked pretty quickly "do
you think we can hang out again?" I said I didn't know, you wanted to talk so I'm good just listening to you. It was the usual thing exes say, "I've changed", though he gave me examples of what he had been doing differently. It was impressive.
We had dinner, shared our food and he talked about a girl he had been hanging out with at work. Nothing happened and she had just gotten too busy for him he said. I told him he is the third ex this summer who has reached out. He said "it wasn't like that when we were together." It seemed to bother him but I told him the truth, at 40 years old, each was, neither has their life financially
together. He also said I never give compliments. I denied that and told him he looked good and I was happy about one of a change he had made. He did look good and I could see why I liked him in the first place though I do firmly remember the reasons for the end.

He asked if I wanted him to call in a day or two to go to a movie. I said yes. Just looking for feedback as the people close to me are also too close to the situation. What are his intentions? I did ask him and he said he'd like to take things a day at a time and see what happens. I intend to keep being open to other men, even to be more proactive in meeting men. But I am open minded to him too. I have some of the same fears, being too old for him and eventually he'd cheat because I wouldn't look as good as him and he could go back to bad (addict type) behavior. Thoughts?
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message

 
Old 08-20-2019, 01:17 AM
 
856 posts, read 474,200 times
Reputation: 830
"hang out again" is code for quacking hard.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 08-20-2019, 01:39 AM
 
344 posts, read 109,262 times
Reputation: 257
Quote:
Originally Posted by rya96797 View Post
"hang out again" is code for quacking hard.
No, I don't actually believe that is his intention. Not to say he's not open to it. But I don't think so.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 08-20-2019, 03:32 AM
 
Location: Brentwood, Tennessee
43,919 posts, read 42,522,667 times
Reputation: 84811
Quote:
Originally Posted by Idkeither View Post

No, I don't actually believe that is his intention. Not to say he's not open to it. But I don't think so.
LOL

Girl ... come on.

Is it this guy? The pots and pans guy?

Stay or go question

Or this one, the lying cheater whose mom cleaned his house?

Is he cheating we traded phones etc
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 08-20-2019, 05:12 AM
 
1,097 posts, read 686,824 times
Reputation: 3373
He sounds like a weirdo. I wouldn't bother talking to him, much less seeing him again if I were you. What would be the point? People can claim they've changed all day long, that doesn't make it true.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 08-20-2019, 06:15 AM
 
344 posts, read 109,262 times
Reputation: 257
Quote:
Originally Posted by BirdieBelle View Post
LOL

Girl ... come on.

Is it this guy? The pots and pans guy?

Stay or go question

Or this one, the lying cheater whose mom cleaned his house?

Is he cheating we traded phones etc
No pots and pans! I hate that guy. It is the other one, he never cheated on me. One of his changes is to be independent from his mom.

Yes, anyone can say they changed, I told him that of course.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 08-20-2019, 06:21 AM
 
Location: Brentwood, Tennessee
43,919 posts, read 42,522,667 times
Reputation: 84811
Quote:
Originally Posted by Idkeither View Post
No pots and pans! I hate that guy. It is the other one, he never cheated on me. One of his changes is to be independent from his mom.

Yes, anyone can say they changed, I told him that of course.
In my experience, exes are "ex" for a reason.

I wouldn't trust him on this.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 08-20-2019, 06:41 AM
 
344 posts, read 109,262 times
Reputation: 257
Quote:
Originally Posted by BirdieBelle View Post
In my experience, exes are "ex" for a reason.

I wouldn't trust him on this.
Thank you, No, I'm just watching to see if he's really changed. I know it's possible because I changed once years ago. I re read the old thread and somewhere in there I wrote he's very good at being nice and saying the right things when I'm mad. I know, of course, he was on his best behavior last night.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 08-20-2019, 06:57 AM
 
1,097 posts, read 686,824 times
Reputation: 3373
[.... he's very good at being nice and saying the right things when I'm mad. I know, of course, he was on his best behavior last night.[/quote]

So on top of all of his other (many) flaws, he's also really good at manipulating you, has done it before, and you always fall for his BS. The definition of insanity is to do something over and over and expect different results. This situation is not going to end up any different than before. Get off the merry go round!
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 08-20-2019, 07:01 AM
 
Location: In a place beyond human comprehension
7,756 posts, read 4,977,090 times
Reputation: 12767
OP, may I ask why you keep giving these guys the benefit of the doubt? What makes you think things will be any different? Genuine question.

Last edited by Auraliea; 08-20-2019 at 07:37 AM..
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
Please register to post and access all features of our very popular forum. It is free and quick. Over $68,000 in prizes has already been given out to active posters on our forum. Additional giveaways are planned.

Detailed information about all U.S. cities, counties, and zip codes on our site: City-data.com.


Reply

Quick Reply
Message:


Over $104,000 in prizes was already given out to active posters on our forum and additional giveaways are planned!

Go Back   City-Data Forum > General Forums > Relationships
Follow City-Data.com founder on our Forum or

All times are GMT -6.

2005-2019, Advameg, Inc. · Please obey Forum Rules · Terms of Use and Privacy Policy · Bug Bounty

City-Data.com - Archive 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18, 19, 20, 21, 22, 23, 24, 25, 26, 27, 28, 29, 30, 31, 32, 33, 34, 35 - Top