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Old 08-24-2019, 03:26 PM
 
Location: London, U.K.
2,953 posts, read 3,330,072 times
Reputation: 1620

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Quote:
Originally Posted by RbccL View Post
Itís not that all very attractive women are shallow. What the women you are attracted to have in common is they treat you kind of crappy. You are attracted to shallow golddiggers who happen to be very attractive physically, and treat you poorly.

I spent a couple of years being attracted to jackasses. Really attracted, then as the relationship moves along, there seems to be one stand out move or comment that makes me hit the brakes and exclaim: ďThis guy is such an arrogant ass! What am I putting up with this for?!Ē

Yeah, you can find someone who treats you poorly and is self centered. You can be selfish and find someone to treat poorly.

Maybe find someone you arenít attracted to, and encourage her to act like you donít matter, then youíll develop an attraction for her!

*Hint: Itís not all women, it just seems that way because youíre the common denominator. Fix you.

Haha. Women are never in the wrong right?

In my late teens/early 20s its true that the attractive women then didn't gold dig as such, they only wanted to know what I was doing (studying, workwise) and whether I drove. Now, they don't blurt it out right away, and are usually impressed i'm an architect. But after we date for a while and they realise architects don't make 6 figures until we're old they start giving me sh*t. It gets old fast.

 
Old 08-24-2019, 03:28 PM
 
Location: London, U.K.
2,953 posts, read 3,330,072 times
Reputation: 1620
Quote:
Originally Posted by moongirl00 View Post
It seems like you're still obsessed/in love with that first girl you dated. She is probably not necessarily more attractive than others, but with your rose colored glasses no woman can measure up to her.



Did you lose your virginity to her?

I've never forgotten, you don't forget your first love, I've dated other women like her since, but the spark has never been there.

No i didn't, that happened the year before.

Last edited by archineer; 08-24-2019 at 03:59 PM..
 
Old 08-24-2019, 03:33 PM
 
Location: Scottsdale, AZ
15,038 posts, read 12,466,891 times
Reputation: 26762
Quote:
Originally Posted by archineer View Post
[/b]
I admit I'm depressed as disability means either a loveless, sexless relationship or most likely singledom for the rest of my life. It depends on whether I recover or not. At the moment I'm focused on recovery.
Yeah, forget about women. You got bigger issues to deal with like your mental and physical health.
 
Old 08-24-2019, 03:49 PM
 
Location: London, U.K.
2,953 posts, read 3,330,072 times
Reputation: 1620
Quote:
Originally Posted by Auraliea View Post
Women like Jhene Aiko, Cassie, Tika Sumpter, etc are more appealing to me than her. But to each their own.
Better images. Though Brook looks quite different now to what she did in the 90s, probably had some work done.
Attached Thumbnails
Would you want to date a man who doesn't find you physically attractive?-screenshot-2019-05-12-03.41.02.png   Would you want to date a man who doesn't find you physically attractive?-5d0123a32500004e12dc80b2.jpeg   Would you want to date a man who doesn't find you physically attractive?-gettyimages-112482770-612x612.jpg  
 
Old 08-24-2019, 03:58 PM
 
Location: London, U.K.
2,953 posts, read 3,330,072 times
Reputation: 1620
Quote:
Originally Posted by Greg78 View Post
You know my stance for it I say go for it.

Speaking from experience a lot of these ehhh looking woman will just be happy to have a good looking guy to show off to their friends and boost their ego and will do whatever it take to keep you happy.
I've done it twice, so know what you're talking about. But I don't know if I could live with the total lack of physical attraction, unsatisfying sex and lack of spark/chemistry.

I know what it's like to be head over heels in love, so everything gets compared to that.
 
Old 08-24-2019, 04:09 PM
 
Location: Continental Europe
794 posts, read 161,565 times
Reputation: 1283
Maybe it's time to stop pining over a Kelly Brook lookalike from 20 years ago, and move on. You're into your 40s and if you were still with this person I'm sure the rose-coloured glasses would have come off already.
 
Old 08-24-2019, 04:20 PM
 
Location: London, U.K.
2,953 posts, read 3,330,072 times
Reputation: 1620
Quote:
Originally Posted by Carly1983 View Post
Maybe it's time to stop pining over a Kelly Brook lookalike from 20 years ago, and move on. You're into your 40s and if you were still with this person I'm sure the rose-coloured glasses would have come off already.
I have "moved on." Just never fell in love again.

But this is beside the point of the original question.
 
Old 08-24-2019, 04:35 PM
 
Location: Texas
10,168 posts, read 3,897,652 times
Reputation: 20583
Quote:
Originally Posted by Huckleberry3911948 View Post
Americans are fat
Itís hard to work around that
Generalization.
 
Old 08-24-2019, 04:37 PM
 
Location: Brentwood, Tennessee
44,017 posts, read 42,602,465 times
Reputation: 85122
Quote:
Originally Posted by archineer View Post
But this is beside the point of the original question.
It's not though.

You've spent nearly a quarter century comparing potential dates to someone else while effectively forgetting that you're leaving out a major part of the equation: you.

There's a psychological reason you "can't" find anyone else attractive enough, and it's YOUR problem to fix. There is a wide range of "attractive." It's like your own insecurities have narrowed that range for you in order to protect you from rejection.
 
Old 08-24-2019, 04:48 PM
 
Location: London, U.K.
2,953 posts, read 3,330,072 times
Reputation: 1620
Quote:
Originally Posted by BirdieBelle View Post
It's not though.

You've spent nearly a quarter century comparing potential dates to someone else while effectively forgetting that you're leaving out a major part of the equation: you.

There's a psychological reason you "can't" find anyone else attractive enough, and it's YOUR problem to fix. There is a wide range of "attractive." It's like your own insecurities have narrowed that range for you in order to protect you from rejection.
Why do women always do this? Men don't say one thing and mean another. Its as if you can't accept a man telling you he's not attracted to average looking women, as if you're personally insulted.

It's not psychological as such, I can't explain why. I looked at her back then and there was this certain spark that was there right off the bat (love at first sight as most put it, and we both felt it.) Other women, I've never felt that with before or since. It's not like I'm not open to it, or have only dated women I'm not attracted too, or women who aren't '10s'.

Nor have I "narrowed the range" it was never there in the first place.

Last edited by archineer; 08-24-2019 at 05:01 PM..
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