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Old Today, 02:27 PM
 
Location: North State (California)
41,226 posts, read 3,144,510 times
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If she is a very light smoker & you could not detect it on the first 8 dates, maybe it doesn't really matter.
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Old Today, 02:35 PM
 
Location: Santa Monica, Ca
7,130 posts, read 3,970,468 times
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Maybe..... someone else left the cigarettes.
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Old Today, 02:37 PM
 
Location: Brentwood, Tennessee
44,051 posts, read 42,618,966 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by evening sun View Post
If she is a very light smoker & you could not detect it on the first 8 dates, maybe it doesn't really matter.
I agree.

If she doesn't smell like cigarettes, my only concern would be does she smoke in the house and in the car?

Will smoke breaks be part of your routine?

(Plus the health concerns but that's a moot point.)
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Old Today, 02:38 PM
 
Location: North Beach, MD on the Chesapeake
34,130 posts, read 42,598,869 times
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I'm still processing "I froze when I saw them".
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Old Today, 02:45 PM
 
12 posts, read 5,282 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by evening sun View Post
If she is a very light smoker & you could not detect it on the first 8 dates, maybe it doesn't really matter.



I've been brought up in a family were none of us smokes so its quite difficult for me to accept even if its a small amount. I don't think I could shake this feeling but I understand what your saying.

I think more importantly its a health concern, I don't want the person that I am having a relationship with to be harming themselves like this. Also habits tend to become more server over time especially in times of stress.
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Old Today, 02:46 PM
 
7,094 posts, read 2,556,862 times
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I'm a smoker. People often tell me they don't smell it on me. But yeah...I'm a smoker.


If some guy told ME it was a deal breaker, I'd stick my hand out and say "Well, it was nice knowing you."


OP, you know you can't make her quit. You've acknowledged that. The only question is if you can live with it or not.
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Old Today, 02:53 PM
Status: "Make sure you include me in your manifesto" (set 27 days ago)
 
Location: Posting from my space yacht.
8,342 posts, read 3,274,536 times
Reputation: 14952
Quote:
Originally Posted by North Beach Person View Post
I'm still processing "I froze when I saw them".
Well to be fair, they were sitting right next to her MAGA hat.
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Old Today, 02:54 PM
 
Location: Santa Monica, Ca
7,130 posts, read 3,970,468 times
Reputation: 17118
Quote:
Originally Posted by Sassybluesy View Post
I'm a smoker. People often tell me they don't smell it on me. But yeah...I'm a smoker.


If some guy told ME it was a deal breaker, I'd stick my hand out and say "Well, it was nice knowing you."


OP, you know you can't make her quit. You've acknowledged that. The only question is if you can live with it or not.

Smokers..( like cat owners) are often nose blind to just how much they stink.
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Old Today, 02:55 PM
 
Location: Brentwood, Tennessee
44,051 posts, read 42,618,966 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Gamblor View Post
I've been brought up in a family were none of us smokes so its quite difficult for me to accept even if its a small amount. I don't think I could shake this feeling but I understand what your saying.

I think more importantly its a health concern, I don't want the person that I am having a relationship with to be harming themselves like this. Also habits tend to become more server over time especially in times of stress.
If that's the case, then end it sooner rather than later.
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Old Today, 03:19 PM
 
Location: Florida
20,041 posts, read 20,139,818 times
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I'm older than dirt and don't have any health problems and don't smoke more in 'times of stress' and find often that people don't know that I smoke because I take extra care...but will tell you … even though it might not be true for her, though I doubt it...that the more comfortable she becomes with you the more relaxed she will probably become about.... the more she might feel you'll accept it because you want to keep seeing her..... so the more of an issue it might become.
If you can't accept her as a smoker, cut it off now.
Exception to that is if she agrees to quit and does so successfully for many weeks.
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