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about 3 years ago i graduated college midsemester and was going to move back home but my college roomy talked me into moving in with him, that didnt work out because we had a disagreement and of course i had to move. my nearest family was in knoxville and i was staying in cincinnati so the girl was seeing asked me to stay with her till the weekend and then i would go back to knoxville. well the night that i went over there we had sex with a condom that she provided because the ones i had she didnt like. i left 3 days later and i had barely laid foot in the state of tennessee and she started calling me and texting saying she was pregnant. of course my parents were getting pretty upset by the threatening messages on their answering machine and they changd the house number and i changed my cell number. i met my wife i kind of knew right away that she was the one and 6 months later we got married. the day of our wedding the girl that claims i got hr pregnant calls my wifes cell phone ( she got thenumber from a friend of mine in cincinnati) and asks to speak to " her babys daddy". my wife was floored and asked what was going on. of course at that point thee was still no baby so we were all sure she was lying or trying to pin someone elses kid on me. my wife conviced me to see an atorney and try to put a stop to this harrassment and of course that did no good. sept 12 005 she had a kid and claimed that kid was mine. the timing didnt add up because together my wife and i have two kids and it takes 40 weeks from your last period if i was listening right. i slept with the girl january 30 and she had this kid full term on sept 12
anyway she is on welfare and they forced a dna out of her and i think they screwed up because somehow it is my kid. this has really put a strain on my marriage and my wife says she wants a divorce and that i lied to her about the kid. she says she cant live the rest of her life with all of the drama and that i must have lied bout when i slept with the girl for the kid to be mine and that it makes her sick to even think about it. i dont know how to get over this because i dont want to lose my wife especially over a kid that i still dont believe is mine.
the dates add up and dna tests don't lie. just because you used a condom doesn't make you free of being a possible father. there could have something wrong (a hole) w/ it. i can understand the pressure on your wife. you should have told her about it when you first married her and then she wouldn't be put between a rock and a hard place, much like you are. if she told you she was pregnant, you should've made arrangements w/ her and figure out what you were gonna do. (abortion, adoption, etc.) it would've made your life a lot easier. if the dna test says it's yours, then you should start taking responsibility for it or the mother could sue you for not paying child support. you, your wife, and the other woman need to all sit down together (that'll cause a lot of stress, but it needs to happen) and work out a deal or something. don't mean to sound like a ***** or anything, just trying to help.
the state of ohio child support enforcement office sent me a summons and they mailed it to some lab in mississippi. she had hers and the kids done 4 monhs before mine and they also tested 4 other guys. btw i do pay support and i always have! i have never missed a payment and i provide health insurance for the kid and most of the time i have to wire her money for diapers because she doesnt have the money or a job. i send him christmas, birthday, and easter gifts every year and on the few occasions i have gotten to visit with him when i sent him back i have had nothing but trouble coming from his mom. the last visit two days after i took him home his mom filed a false police report stating that my wife physically abused him, and that all stems down to jealousy because he gave my wife a hug and a kiss and said he loved her before we left. i have two other kids both with my wife and my son is mean to them, he smacks them, kicks them, bites them and when you ask him why he says mommy told him to. i can tkinda see my wifes point about not wanting anything to do with this situation
you need to have a serioud talk w/ the mother and your little boy w/o her there. what she is doing is bull ****. i shouldn't make assumptions, now knowing her side. but form your point of view, that's bull ****.
Is anything your fault?
Look, its your kid. If his mother is a psycho, well then you shouldn't have slept with a psycho. If she turned into a psycho after you and your parents evaded her calls during her pregnancy ----- well, I can kind of understand her anger. Why is she mad now? Have you ever apologized to her for blowing her off while she was pregnant? For doubting the kid was yours?
Look, as another poster said --- man up! If she is a true psycho, then do the right thing by your son and sue for sole custody. If she is just mad at you and how you handled the situation, then man up again and apologize and do what you have to do to make life good for your son.
I would wish you luck, but I think your son needs it more.
Your ex is trying to use the baby as a way to get back into your life. Man up and be a dad to your baby, but there is no reason you have to be a couple with this woman. Think seriously about getting custody of your son. If your wife really loves you, she will forgive you and not divorce you. Chalk this up to being young and stupid, and not being smart with where you put your dick.
And yes, start taking more responsibility for your actions and stop putting the blame on everyone else.
My only other thought is that you got married too quickly and at still too young an age. Marriage is serious stuff and it's not like you were any good at your prior relationships. Just my opinion though.
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