Welcome to City-Data.com Forum!
U.S. CitiesCity-Data Forum Index
Go Back   City-Data Forum > General Forums > Relationships
 [Register]
Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
View detailed profile (Advanced) or search
site with Google Custom Search

Search Forums  (Advanced)
Reply Start New Thread
 
Old 05-24-2008, 11:47 PM
 
10 posts, read 42,914 times
Reputation: 22

Advertisements

Met a once in lifetime woman in Febuary. When we met she told me she was separated, no kids, married for 1 year and begining the divorce proceedings. We had a great relationship for two months. We saw alot of each other and hade a great time. One day I did not hear from her despite trying to contact her a few times. She then emailed me a confession stating that the emotional rollercoaster she is experiencing from the divorce is overwhelming and needs a break from our relationship to decide if she can continue with it. I told her that I would respect whatever decision she made and wished her the best. I have not contacted her at all since then and have resigned to never hear from her again. I have opened up to the possibility of new relationships and decided to move on with my life, but she is allways in my heart and mind. Should I make an effort to keep in touch or wait 'til she contacts me if ever?
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message

 
Old 05-24-2008, 11:50 PM
 
Location: Tucson
42,831 posts, read 88,162,128 times
Reputation: 22814
Quote:
Originally Posted by ARQUIMEX View Post
Should I make an effort to keep in touch or wait 'til she contacts me if ever?
Wait. It's a very taxing time for her.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 05-25-2008, 08:40 AM
 
27,344 posts, read 27,397,752 times
Reputation: 45894
My brother went through some pretty tough times too. Last girlfriend he dated for almost a year turned out to be married...and she finally told him on a Christmas day that she'd been sneaking around behind her husband all that time and things were getting too 'heated up' to risk getting caught. Funny, she told him she'd never been married. They called it quits from there. It really devastated him though because he really thought the world of her. Thank gawd they were never caught because I dont think the gun laws out there in Texas are as strict as anywhere else...and how was he to know (but try explaining that to the husband)!
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 05-25-2008, 09:08 AM
 
Location: Sunny Florida
7,136 posts, read 12,673,848 times
Reputation: 9547
Move on with your life. If she wants to contact you she will. If you know her birthday send her a card to let her know you're thinking of her , If not, wait until Christmas and send a card then if she's still on your mind.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 05-25-2008, 09:34 AM
 
Location: In the sunshine on a ship with a plank
3,413 posts, read 8,837,664 times
Reputation: 2263
I think for your own good you need to move on and let her remain in your past. Someday it won't hurt and you'll look back with fondness and maybe appreciation for her honesty.

But if you hang on- even in a little way, like intending to send a card or reaching out on a specific date, you're not letting it stay in the past and you will therefore be unable to open yourself to a new, healthier, and potentially more successful relationship. That would be unfair to whomever you may meet, but it would also be grossly unfair to you.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 05-25-2008, 09:54 AM
 
Location: Wu Dang Mountain
12,940 posts, read 21,622,832 times
Reputation: 8681
Quote:
Originally Posted by pirate girl View Post
I think for your own good you need to move on and let her remain in your past.
Totally agree.

Carrying extra baggage around is tiring and distracting, and it's hard to load up on new bags when your arms are already full.

Learn from the past, live in the present, don't worry about the future.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 05-25-2008, 11:34 AM
 
Location: Tucson
42,831 posts, read 88,162,128 times
Reputation: 22814
Quote:
Originally Posted by SifuPhil View Post
Totally agree.

Carrying extra baggage around is tiring and distracting, and it's hard to load up on new bags when your arms are already full.
I disagree in this case. If he's willing to wait some, she may very well come back after she unloads some bags.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 05-25-2008, 11:42 AM
 
Location: Somewhere out there...
3,663 posts, read 8,665,618 times
Reputation: 3750
Quote:
Originally Posted by ARQUIMEX View Post
Met a once in lifetime woman in Febuary. When we met she told me she was separated, no kids, married for 1 year and begining the divorce proceedings. We had a great relationship for two months. We saw alot of each other and hade a great time. One day I did not hear from her despite trying to contact her a few times. She then emailed me a confession stating that the emotional rollercoaster she is experiencing from the divorce is overwhelming and needs a break from our relationship to decide if she can continue with it. I told her that I would respect whatever decision she made and wished her the best. I have not contacted her at all since then and have resigned to never hear from her again. I have opened up to the possibility of new relationships and decided to move on with my life, but she is allways in my heart and mind. Should I make an effort to keep in touch or wait 'til she contacts me if ever?
Wait..........she may not be sure if she wants this divorce.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 05-25-2008, 11:46 AM
 
Location: Tucson
42,831 posts, read 88,162,128 times
Reputation: 22814
Quote:
Originally Posted by asitshouldbe View Post
Wait..........she may not be sure if she wants this divorce.
You're right. That's a possibility, too.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 05-25-2008, 01:29 PM
 
Location: Wu Dang Mountain
12,940 posts, read 21,622,832 times
Reputation: 8681
Quote:
Originally Posted by sierraAZ View Post
I disagree in this case. If he's willing to wait some, she may very well come back after she unloads some bags.
So he should sit in the corner with big puppy-dog eyes and wait...how long? A week? A month? A year? What's the cut-off point in "waiting some"?

What if she NEVER comes back? All that time wasted...

What if, after 3 months, she DOES come back, but she isn't the same person? People change...
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
Please register to post and access all features of our very popular forum. It is free and quick. Over $68,000 in prizes has already been given out to active posters on our forum. Additional giveaways are planned.

Detailed information about all U.S. cities, counties, and zip codes on our site: City-data.com.


Reply
Please update this thread with any new information or opinions. This open thread is still read by thousands of people, so we encourage all additional points of view.

Quick Reply
Message:


Over $104,000 in prizes was already given out to active posters on our forum and additional giveaways are planned!

Go Back   City-Data Forum > General Forums > Relationships
Similar Threads

All times are GMT -6. The time now is 08:26 AM.

© 2005-2024, Advameg, Inc. · Please obey Forum Rules · Terms of Use and Privacy Policy · Bug Bounty

City-Data.com - Contact Us - Archive 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18, 19, 20, 21, 22, 23, 24, 25, 26, 27, 28, 29, 30, 31, 32, 33, 34, 35, 36, 37 - Top