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06-28-2008, 07:58 PM
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make it happen
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Join Date: Mar 2008
1,760 posts, read 934,112 times
Reputation: 534
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I feel sick.....
I have been married for 14 years. Very happily married. For the most part my husband is wonderful and pretty much perfect, anyone would be happy to have him.
The problem is when he drinks. It has happened a few times in the past, he drinks a bit too much and gets very mean. It's hard to explain but he is completely unreasonable. I say boo and he flips out and starts screaming.
We realized it happened when he drank gin so he stopped and was fine for 13 years. This last year it has happened three times, he becomes this crazy person. The last time it happened he said he thought he should stop drinking all together. I thought that was a bit too much to ask, and we have been fine for awhile. Until tonight. It happened again. I am beside myself.
I told him if it EVER happened again that was it, we were over.....
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06-28-2008, 08:02 PM
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Senior Member
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Join Date: Aug 2006
14,948 posts, read 8,582,452 times
Reputation: 3830
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Quote:
Originally Posted by veuvegirl
I have been married for 14 years. Very happily married. For the most part my husband is wonderful and pretty much perfect, anyone would be happy to have him.
The problem is when he drinks. It has happened a few times in the past, he drinks a bit too much and gets very mean. It's hard to explain but he is completely unreasonable. I say boo and he flips out and starts screaming.
We realized it happened when he drank gin so he stopped and was fine for 13 years. This last year it has happened three times, he becomes this crazy person. The last time it happened he said he thought he should stop drinking all together. I thought that was a bit too much to ask, and we have been fine for awhile. Until tonight. It happened again. I am beside myself.
I told him if it EVER happened again that was it, we were over.....
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I am so sorry to hear how badly your night has gone 
You husband has a drinking problem. He can never drink again. Not a sip. Do not try to discuss this with him this evening - don't try to discuss ANYTHING with him right now. You don't feel unsafe right now do you?
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06-28-2008, 08:04 PM
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make it happen
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Join Date: Mar 2008
1,760 posts, read 934,112 times
Reputation: 534
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No I don't, thanks. I just feel incredibly sad. We started to talk, and as I am sure you know he was getting a bit crazy, so I stopped, walked away. That even made him angry....
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06-28-2008, 08:06 PM
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Senior Member
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Join Date: Aug 2006
14,948 posts, read 8,582,452 times
Reputation: 3830
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Quote:
Originally Posted by veuvegirl
No I don't, thanks. I just feel incredibly sad. We started to talk, and as I am sure you know he was getting a bit crazy, so I stopped, walked away. That even made him angry....
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He may begin to panic if he starts to sober up and realizes he has screwed up again. This is not the time to remind him of how you said it would be over if he did this to you again or he could get REALLY mean. Maintain a calm demeanor. As long as you feel safe and unthreatened, maintain a calmness and suggest perhaps he just go to bed and "sleep it off". |
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06-28-2008, 08:07 PM
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The barefoot babe
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Join Date: Oct 2007
Location: Orlando, Florida
8,814 posts, read 5,032,487 times
Reputation: 3386
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Stand your ground and insist that he stop completely. It wouldn't hurt to talk to someone about it and frankly I think he should be attending AA meetings. Its hard to deal with and there is no shame in asking for help.
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06-28-2008, 08:08 PM
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Senior Member
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Join Date: Aug 2006
14,948 posts, read 8,582,452 times
Reputation: 3830
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Lindsey_Mcfarren
Stand your ground and insist that he stop completely. It wouldn't hurt to talk to someone about it and frankly I think he should be attending AA meetings. Its hard to deal with and there is no shame in asking for help.
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Exactly - BUT, not tonight - TOMORROW. |
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06-28-2008, 08:09 PM
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Senior Member
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Join Date: Aug 2006
14,948 posts, read 8,582,452 times
Reputation: 3830
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He is an alcoholic - he can never drink again. Getting him to understand this may be tough, so some professional intervention may be necessary.
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06-28-2008, 08:12 PM
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1st Amendment, RIP!
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Join Date: Jul 2007
Location: Tucson
18,359 posts, read 8,383,618 times
Reputation: 5421
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Quote:
Originally Posted by veuvegirl
I told him if it EVER happened again that was it, we were over.....
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Don't make any hasty decisions you'll regret. LovesMountains is right - no decisions and talks tonight. You said he's overall a good husband, these incidents happen rarely, and he's willing to stop. |
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06-28-2008, 08:12 PM
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The barefoot babe
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Join Date: Oct 2007
Location: Orlando, Florida
8,814 posts, read 5,032,487 times
Reputation: 3386
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Quote:
Originally Posted by lovesMountains
Exactly - BUT, not tonight - TOMORROW.
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OH, most definetly NOT while he is drunk. In fact if it were me, I would probably just leave the house in order to avoid any verbal or physical confrontation while he is in that state. |
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06-28-2008, 08:13 PM
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Senior Member
Status:
"Smile!!! It doesn`t hurt much"
(set 15 days ago)
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Join Date: Feb 2008
Location: Tennessee
4,080 posts, read 1,490,301 times
Reputation: 2481
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I would wait until he sleeps this off and talk to him in the morning.
Some people just cannot drink. I cannot drink hard liquor. Everytime I do, I turn mean as well. Now, I`m ok if I drink my wine, or beer, but no hard alcohol, like JB, or tequilla, rum, vodka, etc.
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