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Old 07-03-2008, 09:05 PM
 
Location: Tucson
42,843 posts, read 54,877,880 times
Reputation: 22812

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Thatís right, friends. I background my dates

I may not have figured out how to find Mr. Right, but I can assure you that information about Mr. Wrong is everywhere. You just have to know where to look.

And Iím not just talking to the ladies. Guys, weíve got closets, too. With a little work, you can get past her shoes and wardrobe to see if any skeletons are rattling around.

Right about now, some of you are probably thinking Iím just a little creepy. Call it whatever you like. I call it peace of mind. It helps me sleep a little better at night knowing Iíve done my very best to make sure Iím not dating a (insert your favorite word for a dirtbag here).


STLtoday - The Data Diva says: Check your date out before you go out (http://www.stltoday.com/stltoday/news/special/infozone.nsf/story/941EDB500315A33F862574570069F35F?OpenDocument - broken link)

I absolutely agree with the lady. Arizona has excellent and free public databases. Tucson is a transient place, but if somebody has lived here for a while, there's a lot to learn about his/her life. How about your states? What do you think about it?

Oh, now I remember I have an example, too. I'm a member of a social group in town. It's really a social and not singles group, but obviously most people ARE single. Two out or four or five guys I checked had restraining orders against them. 'nuff said!
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Old 07-03-2008, 09:07 PM
 
Location: southern california
50,278 posts, read 47,627,816 times
Reputation: 41668
dating is like buying a house only much more expense. and there are no disclosure laws whatsoever.
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Old 07-03-2008, 10:26 PM
 
123 posts, read 234,024 times
Reputation: 96
Geeze i find her article too extreme

we might as well hire a PI before going out with that guy.

Private Investigator, this is where he lives. Can you please find out whether

1) he brings a different woman home each night
2) whether he has a drinking problems
3) does he hang out at stripper joints and stuff

blablabla. after digging all the above dirt, only then i will go out with him

i say, we do research on the guy through his friends, try to understand him from his FB profile perhaps and then understand him from the first few dates.

Our parents and grandparents for that matter, didnt do all that database search and I think they were even better at relationships than us..
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Old 07-03-2008, 10:33 PM
 
Location: Tucson
42,843 posts, read 54,877,880 times
Reputation: 22812
Quote:
Originally Posted by princ3ss06 View Post
Our parents and grandparents for that matter, didnt do all that database search and I think they were even better at relationships than us..
I know... but they didn't live in our weird world, either...
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Old 07-03-2008, 10:45 PM
 
Location: columbia, mo
51 posts, read 57,193 times
Reputation: 24
and finding a date on craigslist is like playing russian roulette
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Old 07-03-2008, 10:51 PM
 
Location: Oxford, OH
1,463 posts, read 2,370,419 times
Reputation: 816
I'm always amazed when people get serious really fast before they really get to know the person. I think you need to see how they treat their families, talk about their ex, their attitude about work, how they handle money, how they use their free time, etc. And unfortunately that just takes time. People can sure keep up an act for the short term...
Don't marry someone you can live with, marry someone you can't live without.
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Old 07-03-2008, 10:53 PM
 
1,730 posts, read 3,039,704 times
Reputation: 850
I think SierraAZ has made an excellent point, and I recommend it highly. And I also recommend that most women read "Ann Rule's books. Do not assume anything. There is tremendous violence against women today, and women need to know who they are dating, to make sure he is not a psychopath/sociopath. If you watch Nancy Grace, 48 hours, 20/20, Greta Van Susteren, and Primetime, you will get an idea of what I am talking about. Women need to know, not only that he maybe married, with four children, and still living with his wife, but that he does not have a POLICE RECORD FOR DRUGS, ALCOHOL, OR VIOLENCE!!!!!!!!!!! Ladies, please, check the true-crime section at Border's or Barne"s and Noble bookstores.
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Old 07-07-2008, 10:06 AM
 
13,779 posts, read 17,033,491 times
Reputation: 7254
If I were dating in this day and age I would be checking prospective dates out too! Yet another reason for me to stay married
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Old 07-07-2008, 10:19 AM
 
25,275 posts, read 27,405,587 times
Reputation: 34558
I think people who pay attention to a woman who calls herself the Data Diva should have their heads examined.

Look. It's very simple. If you want to vet somebody, then use your own antenna. Look how he/she treats other people (Especially the waiter at a restaurant because, in six months, that's how he/she will be treating you). Parse how they talk about themselves and their pasts. And run away from people who want to commit to a relationship by the second date.

But checking somebody's particulars out online is just a little bit creepy, and it says a lot more about you than it does about the person in question.
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Old 07-07-2008, 10:31 AM
 
Location: Tucson
42,843 posts, read 54,877,880 times
Reputation: 22812
Quote:
Originally Posted by cpg35223 View Post
I think people who pay attention to a woman who calls herself the Data Diva should have their heads examined.
Who said it is not the point. I just happened to see this article. Could've posted the same without referring to it.
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