New way for victimless cheating? (wife, movies, married, women)

[dreamofmonterey]

It seems that alot of married men and women probably also can now use IM and cybersex; it is a substitute, and safe way to cheat...I know a friend who will never leave his wife, has three kids and thinks that the cybersex is not cheating, he has been doing this for 3 years now and says at least he isn't "really cheating".

What does everyone here think, what is your take, have you experienced this?

[sierraAZ]

Originally Posted by dreamofmonterey

It seems that alot of married men and women probably also can now use IM and cybersex; it is a substitute, and safe way to cheat...I know a friend who will never leave his wife, has three kids and thinks that the cybersex is not cheating, he has been doing this for 3 years now and says at least he isn't "really cheating".

What does everyone here think, what is your take, have you experienced this?

What do you mean by cybersex? Those ridiculous devices (came across them once, but forgot their name...) you plug into the computer or just plain getting verbally turned on and taking care of yourself?

[dreamofmonterey]

well, not just that (webcam), the person I know texts, emails, sends pictures (even family pics-lol) to various women, likes the ego boost of having tons of emails.....

It seems a whole new ballgame.

[sierraAZ]

Originally Posted by dreamofmonterey

well, not just that (webcam), the person I know texts, emails, sends pictures (even family pics-lol) to various women, likes the ego boost of having tons of emails.....

It seems a whole new ballgame.

Well, I can only say whoever enjoys being with such people can have them. I'd rather not see a man for the rest of my life then put up with somebody like this.

[yankeegirl313]

Of course it is cheating! I think its pretty pathetic myself, but to each their own.

[cpg35223]

Victimless my foot. If you're having hot conversations with somebody who isn't your spouse or significant other, it's only a matter of time before you'll want the real thing. I've known people who started out with it being "harmless" and wound up messing up their lives--and good.

Here's my theory on that stuff. Would you have the same conversation with your SO standing next to you? If not, then you're saying things that you really shouldn't.

[ellie]

Yep, cheating. Anything that requires that much effort (and probably expense) is definitely cheating.

[Chowhound]

Originally Posted by cpg35223

Here's my theory on that stuff. Would you have the same conversation with your SO standing next to you? If not, then you're saying things that you really shouldn't.

This is exactly what I was going to say

[optiflex]

New? They had cyber sex back in the early 90's
IM's? Ben Franklin was writing/recieving suggestive letters,,,well, I think the declaration of independance had traces of one of his love letters on it!
You might as well call flirting cheating.What about love scenes in movies? What if your reading the bible and you imagine the accounts of psalms, is that cheating...lol

[beowulf7]

It depends on how you define "cheating". Some women think if you look at another woman, it's called cheating. (One of my friend's ex was supremely paranoid and jealous like this - he eventually had to break off the relationship.) And some women, like Hillary Clinton, only consider it cheating if your husband goes all the way with another woman.

I'm somewhere in between. I think it's cheating when physical contact is involved. (Therefore, IMO, Bill Clinton was cheating when he was blown by a whale.) However, sending flirty IMs and e-mails is not cheating.