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nohhhhh, your not, but the OP might be? I'm simply giving my opinions, ideas, conversation???? I'm not stating that you have to think like me...and I'm not forcing my views upon anyone, simply offering them, isn't what this forum is for?????? The asking for approval part just popped in my head...which to me, sometimes not all the time, when a poster posts a question as such, they are looking for approval for what they are doing.....or not
put that in your pipe and smoke it....
I think it's quite evident that the OP is not involved in this particular lifestyle, so, therefore, approval is not being sought. But, you are expressing an opinion and we all know what they say about opinions is, don't we?
I think there is a pattern with those in alternative marriages or lifestyles....they differ from the mainstream in the first place because they are not looking for "permission" from anyone outside their marriage anyway. They already feel accepted by their partner and within themselves so they don't need it from anyone else.
Those in mainstream marriages or lifestyles are doing what they do to be accepted by everyone around them and probably need "permission" to do anything outside of expectations set by society.
I think there is a pattern with those in alternative marriages or lifestyles....they differ from the mainstream in the first place because they are not looking for "permission" from anyone outside their marriage anyway. They already feel accepted by their partner and within themselves so they don't need it from anyone else.
Those in mainstream marriages or lifestyles are doing what they do to be accepted by everyone around them and probably need "permission" to do anything outside of expectations set by society.
I think there is a pattern with those in alternative marriages or lifestyles....they differ from the mainstream in the first place because they are not looking for "permission" from anyone outside their marriage anyway. They already feel accepted by their partner and within themselves so they don't need it from anyone else.
Those in mainstream marriages or lifestyles are doing what they do to be accepted by everyone around them and probably need "permission" to do anything outside of expectations set by society.
I'm not sure that I agree with this, while I do agree that the pattern is found in those that have alternative marriages or lifestyles in the sense that they differ from the mainstream in the first place. However, I believe that differing is within their views about the such moreso than the not seeking acceptance or approval.
Similarly, and speaking only for myself, I am in a mainstream marriage and lifestyle, not because I am seeking to be accepted by those around me nor because I feel the need to have societies permission to step outside of it. I am in it because it is what I believe in bottom line. It is not based on anyone's acceptance, in fact, there were many that believed and encouraged my husband to live together rather than get married. Some even refused to come to the wedding because they felt that we needed to live together first for X amount of time before getting married and based on their principles and beliefs refused to attend. This includes some family members mind you.
So I disagree that it would be based on seeking approval, acceptance or permission. I mean okay maybe for some, but I don't think it is as a general rule any more so than saying that those that step outside of the mainstream do it because they are confrontational personalities and love to rock the boat, in essence the more controversial the better (which is another rationale that I have heard).
I still think it's more of a comfort level issue and how people feel about certain things. I have a very adventurous spirit and will most certainly try something new...if, it's within my comfort level. Others aren't geared that way and are more comfortable living inside the box. Fortunately, for me, I am very comfortable with a wide range of things, sexuality being one.
I mean okay maybe for some, but I don't think it is as a general rule any more so than saying that those that step outside of the mainstream do it because they are confrontational personalities and love to rock the boat, in essence the more controversial the better (which is another rationale that I have heard).
Darn those open-minded and free spirit people. They are always looking for a fight.
Darn those open-minded and free spirit people. They are always looking for a fight.
LOL. That's the general notion for some people. However, I disagree with it. I truly believe that most people simply live their lives according to their beliefs, their views, their opinions, and what is comfortable for them, not because they are seeking approval, acceptance, permission, or to stir the pot so to speak. Though as with everything, there are those that do, I just don't think it's a general thing.
I think it's quite evident that the OP is not involved in this particular lifestyle, so, therefore, approval is not being sought. But, you are expressing an opinion and we all know what they say about opinions is, don't we?
I think there is a pattern with those in alternative marriages or lifestyles....they differ from the mainstream in the first place because they are not looking for "permission" from anyone outside their marriage anyway. They already feel accepted by their partner and within themselves so they don't need it from anyone else.
Those in mainstream marriages or lifestyles are doing what they do to be accepted by everyone around them and probably need "permission" to do anything outside of expectations set by society.
I can't agree with this, basically because if they did feel accepted and good about themselves, why indulge with someone else?
Secondly, those of us who were or are in marriages...well, let me reword that...I was loyal to my husband, it never occured to me, to run around...and I never really was a follower, therefore, acceptance by society wasn't an issue. Nor was needing permission...actually moved far away, therefore, I chose my new friends...
open marriage is sometimes for flakey liberal extremists or people that get bored easy...
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