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what would you do if your other half forgot about your birthday? We are together just about 1 year, same sex relationship, and he forgot my birthday.
We have been through holidays, valentines, weekend getaways, etc...he has never forgot anything...we celebrated his birthday this past winter...
I felt hurt that he forgot and proceeded to leave the house to go get me a card and gift...I felt hurt that it was after the fact, but he still made an effort, but can't get passed it...Life is short, but it still upsets me.
Am I being unreasonable? Drama-King/Queen? lol What should he do to make it up to me? or was his efforts after the fact enough?
We are drama-free, this is the first real disagreement we have had...we both work hard and play hard so we don't believe in drama. We rather put that energy in playing a tennis game, swimming, traveling, spending time together etc...
Location: Visitation between Wal-Mart & Home Depot
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I see this as the single biggest issue with same-sex (male) couples: There isn't a woman in the mix to remind everyone of birthdays, anniversaries, social events, etc. etc. Gay or not, men are men from the day they are born and men forget sh*t.
I'm a birthday fool. I love birthdays - I expect (and it happens) a full birthday blow out each year even now approaching 40. LOL I love them, my family gets the same treatment. For someone to forget my bday would be hell to pay LOL
So, if your bday isn't that important to you and you haven't made it a big deal, then you can't complain that he forgot. If on the other hand you hooped and hollered about it for the past few weeks, then yes, be angry that he still forgot.
Don't expect much this early on in the relationship though and don't be hurt by it.
My husband never forgets my birthday or our anniversary because I always do a countdown for the entire previous month. We mark off the days on the calendar for four full weeks.
(I don't expect gifts or even a card, but I do expect to be treated like a princess that day. He makes the coffee in the morning, makes supper or orders out, cleans the kitchen, or whatever. )
Anyway, the point is, I'd rather have my special day than be mad at him for forgetting so I don't let him forget. If you'd rather he remember, then remind him. If you'd rather "test" his love and fight about it if he disappoints you, then just wait around to see if he remembers.
And if you plan to remind him next year, then you already know that you should just let it go this time.
My husband never forgets my birthday...but he does NOTHING to celebrate it either. That's worse, IMO!!
If you love him and he's a good match for you otherwise, then just take THIS year in good grace, and see it as a warning that NEXT year, you'll have to take matters into your own hands LOL.
In the past I've:
~ gone shopping for myself ahead of time, and then laid out the special supper, cake, balloons and whatever I wanted and bought myself (on his credit card obviously), wrapped and tied, on the table waiting for him to come home from work. I thought he'd be offended the first time--that was the idea LOL--but he was just relieved.
~ if I get ignored on a birthday, well FINE (huff) I just wait until the weekend, and TA-DA, he's alone with the kids while I go enjoy myself for a weekend away, pretending to be hurt and mortified over the birthday when really I'm just glad to get away for a few days
~ some years I actually plan a day out for us a few days ahead of time, claiming a doctor's appointment or something, then in the car I spring it on him: "By the way, it's my birthday, so we're off to have fun somewhere. Now drive." LOL One year we just went to the beach and had a wonderful day away: no money spent or presents, but at least I felt like my birthday was a special day.
That's the point, isn't it? It's not that we need a present, or any money spent on us, we just want a day where we feel special to someone we love. Of course it's an important day!! But men don't seem to be good at remembering this sort of thing...so remember for him, and help him out.
HAPPY BIRTHDAY, by the way!!!
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